Tuesday, 18 November 2008

MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER




Why do bloggers blog?

A friend asked me this question today. (Yes, I still have the odd one, and believe me some are really odd).

Some do it for the best of reasons, and, I suppose some do it just because they can. Maybe some do it so that they can expose their lives to others, hoping that “others” will think that their lives are interesting.

Some do it out of arrogance, thinking that they know best and their viewpoint is the only one that matters.

But does it really matter why? Isn’t it the different points of view that can be opined, or all the information that can be given or received that matters?

Blogging enables people to communicate it enables discussion, and a chance to join together against the things that really irritate us, or things that are wrong.

I know why I blog, I do it to keep sane, I do it because I want to get a message out to people and perhaps just maybe make a tiny difference to this tortured world and all the tortured souls in it.

It’s good fun, it’s fulfilling and it’s really great to kick “the Powers that Be” in the knackers as often as I can, and I can truly say that I enjoy it.

This friend then asked me, why don’t you use your own name?

This was a bit more difficult to answer, I had a quick think, and I suppose the answer is: -

It is my armour, it enables me to say the things I say without having to be me, I think Medical bloggers use another “identity” because of fear of reprisals from the “Powers that Be”, other people may use another name because they are “damaged” in some way and don’t want people who know them see their souls.

Very few people know who Angus really is, but I trust them to keep the secret, until I am ready to “come out”.

I certainly have two personalities, I have “ME” and “ANGUS”, “ME” is damaged, damaged by the death of my wife three years ago, which in my opinion was needless, damaged by the attitude of the consultant, and of the senior management of the hospital, damaged by the piss poor attitude and lack of skills and understanding of the Healthcare Commission.

“Me” doesn’t really give a shit if I live or die, to “ME” life is over, I died three years ago, and the body is just a biological shell, the psyche has retreated into a corner, and is waiting to fade away.

But from the “darkness” another “ME” arose, it was nameless and shapeless at first, but slowly the anger, and the desire for “justice” moulded the new “ME” and “Angus” was created.

When I am Angus I can stand back and look at things from a totally different perspective, Angus can do things that “ME” can’t, because he cares, and can say what he wants without fear of reprisal he can try to alter peoples perception of “authority” to try and explain what is happening to the poor, the old, the disadvantaged and the sick (Superman suit is going on).

Angus of course is me, “WE” are the same person, but two different aspects of one personality, I know that angus is not real, but as him I can carry on and try to redress the injustices and the arrogant attitudes and the greed and thoughtlessness of life and certain people.

Multiple Personality Disorder? I don’t think so, I am fully aware of my two “parts” not bonkers then? That is a matter for those with “Proper Training” to say, if they really gave a shit, which they don’t. There, you see another reason for Angus.

When I am “ME” I carry on, I do the shopping and all the other things that “normal” people do, but Angus is a bit different, and perhaps that is why I blog, to get away from the mundane existence that seems to pervade society at the moment, all the bad news and misery that is thrust down our throats.

Angus? I love him, he is the best thing to happen to “ME” in three years, and along with Angus has come new friends, caring people who I have never met, but I know care about “Angus” and “ME”, and with care and perseverance “Angus” will hopefully be around for many years to come, as long as there is a need for him, and people keep reading “his” blogs.


Angus Dei, and proud of it.

1 comment:

Liz said...

Seems the best reason for blogging to me.