Wednesday, 21 October 2009

Auntie Knows best; Show off; Famous last words; the power of the biscuit and Blimey!





Sod the weather; I give up, bit late today because I had to reply to a Numpty comment on Angus Dei Politico usual pilchard attitude.

Today is Swine Flu Vaccination day, amid all the controversy and scares it has finally arrived.

Seriously ill hospital patients and the health staff caring for them will be the first of 14m people in the "priority group" to be given the jab.

From next week GPs will begin inviting people with health problems, damaged immune systems and pregnant women to come forward for immunisation.

Medical chiefs urged everyone in the priority group to have the vaccine.

The government has yet to decide whether the rest of population will be immunised, although enough doses have been ordered.

If you want it, have it but the slightly creepy thing is “The government has yet to decide whether the rest of population will be immunised” don’t we get a choice then?

This is a bit old (5 November 2008) but shades of Ryanair?; Jet2 has apologised for charging an amputee who wanted to take a spare pair of prosthetic legs on holiday an additional £10 each way.

Mick Skee, 47, of Wardley, Gateshead, lost both legs after contracting meningitis two years ago.

He wanted to take a spare pair of false limbs on his holiday to Majorca next May but Jet2 told him he would have to pay a surcharge.

The airline has now refunded the money, and said it had changed its guidelines.

Jet2 also said it was allowing Mr Skee to fly for free on the holiday by way of an apology.

Wide bodied and legless-the plane that is not Mr Skee.


First up:




Not content with mucking about with nursery rhymes the BEEB has a site that tells us how to live where you can sort your weight out and find information on a myriad of complaints, click the link it is actually quite good.

To sate the needs of my female fans (I was unaware that I had any fans at all) here are several pictures of the stages of man.








Fu Bingli, a kung fu master from China, has proved he has the strongest fingers in the world.

Bingli – who has been studying martial arts for 32 years since the age of just seven – can stand upside down supporting himself on just one index finger.

On Monday he scooped the Guinness world record for completing 12 press ups on just one finger of his right hand.

"I've been training since I was seven years old and my index finger has as much strength in it as most people's entire body," said Fu of Lianyungang, eastern China.

Wonderful, I can manage twelve stands up from the sofa, as long as I have a rest after each one.

99-year-old George Geeson could be Britain's safest driver.

After 84 years of driving he has never had a speeding ticket or caused an accident during nearly one million miles at the wheel.

Mr Geeson got his licence at the age of 15 in 1925 driving a Model T Ford and bought his first car, a Wyllis-Overland Whippet, 10 years later for two pounds and ten shillings (£2.50).

He has owned dozens of cars and motorbikes in 84 years of driving and has no trouble on the roads despite never having to sit a formal driving test.

Mr Geeson, a grandfather-of-three, has only ever been involved in one accident - when another motorist shunted into the back of him in the pouring rain in 1958.

Mr Geeson a former garage owner, of South Witham, near Grantham, Lincs. said his driving motto is safety first and he had always been careful to observe the law.

He said: ''I have always said to myself if I stay on the right side of the law I've no reason to be scared of anyone or anything.

''We used to think that 60mph was very fast but now people seem to drive at 100mph and that's too fast for me.

''I've always been careful. Even the one accident I did have was down to somebody else."

Well done George, so if you are travelling up the A1 and the Peugeot 106 in front is doing seven MPH give him a wave as you pass him.

Council workers are given advice on how to eat biscuits safely in the latest example of health and safety rules taken too far.

One council has even claimed to have supervised tea breaks for safety reasons.

The tea and biscuit policies were disclosed in a survey about accidents caused by biscuits which was sent out as a joke by a biscuit company.

The fictitious 'British Biscuit Advisory Board' was created as part of a £3m marketing campaign by Fox's biscuits.

National television advertisements and billboards highlighted its campaign to 'educate the public about responsible biscuit choices and promote safer biscuit eating practices'.

A spoof 'workplace biscuit risk assessment test' - written in bureaucratic Health and Safety language - was created and issued to 5,849 council workers across the UK.

A total of 813 over-cautious council employees clicked through to the online survey and 437 worried workers actually took the time to complete it.
According to the Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents, 400 people a year in Britain had to be treated in Accident and Emergency departments for biscuit-related accidents. These included 'somebody falling over while reaching for a biscuit', someone slipping on a chocolate biscuit on their stairs and various people choking on biscuits.

However, a spokesman urged councils not to panic about biscuit-related injuries and suggested people should just use common sense.

A total of 441 primary councils were targeted by the survey. Of the 5,849 workers sent the survey 1,556 were in human resources departments and 516 worked in health and safety.

Crumbs!


And finally:



A Somerset man has created a psychedelic hearse to offer funky funerals to the hippy generation.


Matthew Shuter, 54, says he saw a gap in the market with the 'baby boomer' generation now reaching their later years.
So he bought a Daimler hearse and had it covered in a funky psychedelic pattern.

Mr Shuter, who lives near Taunton, said: "The Woodstock generation is now dying out. They really lived a colourful life - they wouldn't want to go to their funeral in a boring black hearse."

As well as funerals Mr Shuter says the unusual vehicle is perfect for festival goers, or beach bums who need a way to transport their surfboards.

He said: "I had the idea while I was at Glastonbury this year. I noticed there are lots of flower power camper vans out there in all sorts of shapes and sizes.

"It doesn't just have to be used as a hearse - it's a brilliant surfing vehicle and requires minimum adaption to take a surfboard in on the rollers."

But Mr Shuter does not intend to pursue his unusual business idea himself. He plans to auction the psychedelic hearse on eBay.

I bid two daisies and an aspidistra


Angus

AnglishLit

Angus Dei-NHS-THE OTHER SIDE

Angus Dei politico







3 comments:

James Higham said...

That top B&W photo under font of Knowledge - I'm trying, Angus, I'm trying but I've only been back four sessions.

angus said...

Me too James, at least that's what people keep telling me.

CherryPie said...

I wonder how much money he will get for the hearse...