Show George the money: Ostrich boomers: Big balloon: Big bog: Nailed dahn in Bulgaria: and Diet glasses.

The usual at the Castle this morn-damp, drear and dodgy, I see that the jubbly thing is finally orf the TV-almost and the world can breathe a sigh of relief.

During lulls in the skywater I popped out to the garden and snapped some more roses that have bloomed, and then retired to the nice warm study.

 

And the interweb thingy is behaving rather badly this non-bank holiday Wednesday.

 Shit for brains Son of a B......aronet and alien reptile in disguise

George (the pills aren’t working at all) Osborne has come up with yet another Piss Poor idea, apparently he wants to use Britain's army of small savers to boost the country's growth prospects.

Knob head has told Treasury officials to find ways to persuade savers to transfer billions of pounds held in bank accounts, building societies and investment funds to new government "growth bonds".

The money would be invested in infrastructure projects such as toll roads, green energy and house building.

Projects that could benefit from the idea include extending London Underground's Northern line to Battersea, a new Thames crossing, toll roads alongside some of the busiest sections of motorway, and significant investment in housing stock. Ministers’ point out that contraction in the building trade led to the double-dip recession.

Oh no it fucking didn’t, it was the lack of money in people’s pockets because of the exorbitant VAT rates, tax on go juice, rising food Leccy and gas prices, spiralling unemployment, wage freezes and the total inability of the Piss Poor Policies Millionaires Club Coalition to realise that the less we have in our pockets the less we will spend.

A bunch of inept, inexperienced, in the money wankers....

Meanwhile, according to “experts”

People in their 60s are “burying their heads in the sand” when it comes to their health, doctors warn.

Allegedly the “sorry to bother you doctor” culture means many are risking their health, found the study, published to coincide with the Diamond Jubilee.

The Department of Health poll found a third of those in their 60s put off going to see their GP in the hope that a problem would just go away.

Almost two-thirds (62 per cent) thought health problems were “inevitable” in one’s 60s - an attitude that was particularly prevalent among men, with 71 per cent thinking so.

One in 10 said they would rather not know if a problem was serious - even though doctors have much more success if they diagnose life-threatening conditions like heart disease and cancer early.

Ministers are now working on a new initiative for Change4Life, its healthy lifestyle campaign, aimed specifically at older people.

Or is it that it takes about a week to get an appointment with your GP, and when you finally get to see him/her all they do is nag you about smoking, drinking and becoming a vegetarian because the PPPMCC insists?

Left to the home of the gasbag and the land of surveillance

 The U.S. Army is expected to test launch a new-generation surveillance blimp designed to float above warzones, intercepting communications and monitoring people on the ground below.

Up to three so-called “Long Endurance Multi-Intelligence Vehicles” were commissioned by the Army in 2010 as part of a $517 million deal cut with defence and aerospace manufacturer Northrop Grumman. The 300-foot-long, unmanned, helium-filled airship, Grumman claims, will “shape the future” of the military’s intelligence-gathering capabilities—adding a new dimension to its existing fleet of surveillance aircraft by providing a “persistent unblinking stare” from the sky.

A prototype LEMV is set to take off sometime between June 6 and 10 from New Jersey's Joint Base McGuire-Dix-Lakehurst before heading to Florida to be fitted with “a custom-designed gondola containing the blimp’s cameras and radios,” according to Wired. If the trial run on domestic soil is successful, it is thought the airships will then be sent to Afghanistan.

Wonderful; $517 million on something that could be brought dahn with a bow and arrow, a crossbow, a rifle or a missile because the bleedin thing only travels at the speed of a three legged tortoise...

East to the land that allegedly doesn’t glow anymore

Someone with radiation poisoning is building the biggest public restroom in the world, set on a plot of land measuring 200 square meters, and costing US$125,000.

They say that a 6.5-foot wall will shield women from prying eyes and that there is also a curtain they can use to further protect themselves while in the glass-encased toilet.

Surrounded by flowers and plants, the flowery fresh scent will be all that remains after you have used the toilet.

According to an official from the Tourism Promotion Department in Ichihara City, the extravagant toilet enclosure and its picturesque surroundings were created as a tourist attraction at next year’s Ichihara City Art Festival, a government-led initiative to “help improve the area through the renovation of public facilities with the help of arts.” 

Rubbery; we chaps however will be banned as it is for “ladies” only.

Left a fair way and up more than a whimsy

According to Bozhidar Dimitrov, head of the National History Museum in the Bulgarian capital Sofia, two skeletons from the Middle Ages have been discovered near the Black Sea town of Sozopol.

"These two skeletons stabbed with rods illustrate a practice which was common in some Bulgarian villages up until the first decade of the 20th century," said Mr Dimitrov.

Widespread superstition led to iron rods being hammered through the chest bones and hearts of those who did evil during their lifetimes for fear they would return after death to feast on the blood of the living.

In 2004, archaeologist Petar Balabanov unearthed six nailed-down skeletons at a site near the eastern town of Debelt.

He said the pagan rite also was practised in neighbouring Serbia and other Balkan countries.

People believed the rod would pin them down to prevent them from leaving their graves at midnight and terrorising people as they slept, the historian explained.

 

Unfortunately it didn’t work because they all moved to Blighty and now call themselves the ‘Coalition’.

And finally:

Back over to the land where radiation isn’t affecting people at all

Goggles that trick the wearer into thinking the plain snack in their hand is a chocolate cookie, or make biscuits appear larger have been unveiled in Japan, offering hope to weak-willed dieters everywhere.

Researchers at the University of Tokyo have developed devices that use computer wizardry and augmented reality to fool the senses and make users feel more satisfied with smaller -- or less appealing -- treats.

On one device goggle-mounted cameras send images to a computer, which magnifies the apparent size of the cookie in the image it displays to the wearer while keeping his hand the same size, making the snack appear larger than it actually is.

In experiments, volunteers consumed nearly 10 percent less when the biscuits they were eating appeared 50 percent bigger.

They ate 15 percent more when cookies were manipulated to look two-thirds of their real size.

Users can set the device to their favourite taste so they think they are eating a chocolate or strawberry-flavoured cookie.

Hirose says experiments so far have shown 80 percent of subjects are fooled.

The team has no plans as yet to commercialise their invention, but would like to investigate whether people wanting to lose weight can use the device.

Err no.......

That’s it: I’m orf to get some willow glass

And today’s thought:

Olympic ostrich

Angus