Friday, 14 September 2012

Royal Norks-allegedly: Taking the piss: still taking the piss: El Sluggo: Funnel Web hunters wanted: Dead end voting: and Plane daft.

Loads of atmospheric movement, not a lot of lack of cold, even less solar stuff and much less skywater at the Castle this morn.
I think I may have to give up this blogging thing, the old brain cell is seriously on the blink, can’t remember words, forget to do the spell check, forget to add labels, forget what I was going to ramble about, forget to reply to comments, forget to visit/comment on other bloggers and sometimes I forget to blog at all...

 Now what was I saying?

And even more allegedly Will’s bird got her headlights out on the terrace of a guest house during a brief holiday she enjoyed with the tall bald bloke in France last week.
The couple were staying in Provence at a chateau owned by Lord Linley, the Queen's nephew, ahead of their Diamond Jubilee tour of south-east Asia and the South Pacific on behalf of the Queen.
And surprise, surprise it seems that a naughty person with a camera snapped the royal norks-allegedly.
The magazine's French website showed an image of its new front cover with a heavily pixilated image of a woman with dark hair, it claims is the Duchess, in a bikini apparently about to remove her top.
William and Kate were told about the allegations this morning before they visited they Assyakirin Mosque and had also looked at the images on the website.
Speaking about the royal couple a source said: "They're saddened their privacy has been breached - if it has been breached."
The source stressed it could not confirm if the pictures were of Kate as they appeared to have been taken with a long lens and were pixilated.

So what’s all the bleedin fuss about then?


Apparently the Piss Poor Policies Millionaires Club Coalition has managed to splurge £500 million on private schools for the orfspring of diplomats and military personnel in the last three years.
Ministers last year backed down on plans to scrap the allowance, which costs the taxpayer more than £21,000 per child, as part of public sector spending cuts. Instead they promised to cut the bill through "efficiencies". But research by the Bureau of Investigative Journalism has revealed that the cost of the perk has increased by nearly ten per cent since 2009 and last year stood at £203m across three departments.
The privilege, known as the Continuity of Education Allowance (CEA), exists to support children whose parents work for the government overseas. It covers the costs of schooling abroad and in the UK, but the majority, at least £99m each year, is spent on fees for expensive British boarding schools.
Public schools where the state has subsidised places include Marlborough College, Tony Blair's old school Fettes College and Roedean.
By far the biggest bill for private schooling comes from the Ministry of Defence (MoD), which funded more than £189m of school fees last year. All ranks are eligible for the perk but, because families have to make a contribution of a least 10 per cent, it is overwhelmingly taken up by officers.
Despite promises to make savings on the scheme the total bill has actually risen by £16m since 2008/9 – in part caused by new tax arrangements. It comes at the same time as the Army is in the process of axing 20,000 posts because of budget cuts.

Greedy, arrogant, self centred bastards....

A council chief criticised by ministers for collecting an "unacceptable" £420,000 pay-off has been awarded a senior new job cutting waste in Whitehall.
Katherine Kerswell was last night accused of riding the government "job merry-go-round"; after it emerged she is the new director-general of civil service reform at the Cabinet Office.
Her salary will be £142,000 for the role, which ministers have struggled to fill since April 2011.
The 49-year-old was awarded the new job almost a year after leaving Kent County Council with a £589,000 pay package, including her salary and the hefty pay-off. She had been in the job just 16 months before taking redundancy.
Francis Maude, the cabinet office minister, said she would be leading the Coalition’s plan to improve the civil service set out in June.
“I want to see a Civil Service that is flatter, faster, more digital, more unified, with better capabilities and performance management, focused on outcomes not process, with modern terms and conditions, and which is more enjoyable to work for,” he said.

 No wonder she is fucking laughing...


The Spanish slug, that can grow up to 15cm long, is thought to have arrived in salads during the summer – and has already spread as far west as Wales
Giant Spanish slugs that invaded Britain are mating with native ones to create a mutant super slug capable of wreaking crop havoc.
They are also threatening to wipe out local species with new diseases and ­parasites or by simply devouring them
Sylvia Locke, 72, from the Amman Valley in Wales, has seen several in her garden. She said: “We caught them eating snails. It was gruesome.
“Our dog caught one it was so big I thought it was a mouse.”

Saw one meself yestermorn but I managed to deal with it by hitting it with half a brick-cheaper than slug poison.


The Australian Reptile Park wants new recruits in the hunt for funnel web spiders.
The tourist attraction has sent out an SOS to residents across the coast for funnel webs, particularly males, which are milked for their venom used to create anti-venom.
"Usually at this time of year we have been inundated with people bringing in funnel webs, because we have experienced that warmer weather mixed with spring showers which is what they like, but it's been quite dry for the last few weeks so sightings are down," Australian Reptile Park operations manager Tim Faulkner said.
The spiders are milked once a week and it takes about 70 milkings to create a single dose of anti-venom.
If you see a funnel web and want to catch it, Mr Faulkner said it's best to use a glass container.
"We tell people if they feel comfortable collecting them either use a stick or a utensil to help scoop them up and into the glass container, and don't panic ... they won't chase you," he laughed.

Sod that....


Apparently officials in Texas are sending out about 1,800 letters marked "VERIFICATION OF VOTER STATUS."
What you're supposed to do, within 30 days is contact county elections officials and tell them you are not dead.

According to
Rich Parsons, director of communications for the Texas Secretary of State's office.
More than 13 million people are registered to vote in Texas, and 76,990 of them were found to be on the "potentially deceased" list. The total includes strong matches (meaning the registered voters name, Social Security number and date of birth were exactly the same as a potentially deceased person) and weak matches (in which some but not all of the elements paired up, maybe a few digits of the Social Security numbers were off).
All of the names were sent to voter registrars across the state. Tarrant County Elections Administrator Steve Raborn says about 4,000 of them came to his office.
Raborn says people in his office searched the list, eliminated many of the weak matches, removed clearly identifiable strong matches from the voter registration rolls and last week mailed letters to about 1,800 people whose life-or-death status was uncertain.
By law, those who don't respond within 30 days will be removed from the voter rolls, although if they show up to vote in the Nov. 6 election they'll still be allowed to cast a ballot and their votes will be counted.

My brain hurts...

And finally:


A US man is trying to sell his damaged plane online - after landing it upside down in a storm.
The seller, named only as Jim on the Craigslist, wants the equivalent of £10,000 for the 1968 Cessna 172 H.
In the listing, Jim explains in his own way how the plane came to look like a turtle flipped on its back.
"It started out as a bad hair day, ya know kinda windy, got called out to plow, course here in DV (Death Valley) we plow gravel off the road, anyway must have had a twister come thru so I spent the afternoon flipping my plane," he admitted.
Jim goes on to list the extensive list of damaged parts that potential buyers may wish to consider before lodging a bid.
They may be consoled that the plane, currently at Furnace Creek airport in Death Valley, California, has at least now been turned the right way up. 

Must be worth £10, 001 by now then...


And today’s thought:
Worth £21,000 of anyone’s money



1 comment:

A K Haart said...

Don't give up the blogging!! We need your quirky take on daily news - it's an essential antidote to all the pap.

I'd lend you my brain cell, but I'll need it later on when Grandson asks me lots of probing questions about Tom and Jerry.