Tuesday, 18 December 2012

I give up

Or rather I didn’t; some two weeks and quite a few dark things ago I had an aberration, and decided that after forty five years I would give up the nicotine thingies.

Having absolutely no will power, and being allergic to the patch do-dahs and finding that the E-fag things are about as much use as a floppy on a porn set I had a word with the nice people dahn at the Tesco chemical dept and they “persuaded” me that the best way to go was a whatsit called Tampax Champix which I could start on immediately without having to go and see my general medic.

So orf I went home to the Castle Champix in hand and an appointment in a week’s time with an “advisor”.
I tried to read the "instructions" but as they were the size of a roll of wallpaper I lost the will to read about halfway dahn the second paragraph and unfortunately never made it to the "side effects" bit.

I started the next day on the little white ones, and after about half an hour the nausea started, then the headache, then the indigestion, then the dizziness, by day five I was confined to bed, bucket in hand, the room spinning, head throbbing, stomach heaving and joints aching, but I said to myself “self it will be worth it”.

On day eight I started on the blue ones-double amounts of nausea, dizziness, headache, constipation, bad dreams and urine production dahn to zero but I said to myself “self it may be worth it”.

By day ten I was still in the four poster, room spinning, head about to explode, stomach empty of all sustenance, nightmares, not a piss in days and then it happened, I started to go blind, I kid you not, the world slowly became fuzzier and fuzzier and then disappeared, so I said to myself “self it isn’t worth it”.

So I stopped the Tampax Champix ten days ago and have only just managed to find my left handed brain cell and regain a partial set of the alphabet, still have a whimsy of falling dahn and lying in vomit, still knackered, but I am now able to pee and eat. 

So I have given up-giving up, and as I sit here on the sofa with a nice cup of milky coffee and a smoke watching his Maj galloping around the garden I realise that there are far worse things in life than smoking.

But while in my vomit soaked, head bursting, spinning, arid bed I did come up with a few alternative pressies for those who may not be your favourite people.


The Ex-box

The Wee

And the Eye-pad.







Bernard said...

I don't think it is a good idea to 'throw in the towel' on giving up Angus.
I know it's easier said than done, but my blog friend Foody is now having to suffer the consequences of being married to a life long smoker.
Now it's up to you if you read the bit on the end of this link, as it is about what many smokers fear.
It may however encourage you to have another try, perhaps a different method? But please don't give up trying. :)
ps Could it be, that it reacted badly with any other medication?


A K Haart said...

Welcome back, I wondered what you were up to.

I suspect the stuff you tried is at least as risky as smoking - possibly worse as you've already survived forty five years.

Angus Dei said...

After the last 3 weeks I am definitely giving up giving up this year, orf to see thr general medic on the morrow-we shall see.

Checked with the chemistry dept dahn Tesco-no contra-indications:(

Cheers AK

Here's to the next 45 years:)

blackdog said...

Silly old sod. I would have thought by now that you might have realised that Big Pharma doesn't do benign (drugs that is). Varenicline is a nasty molecule and has caused a few problems, as just like nicotine it's a nicotinic agonist, which means it mimics ACh. There are lots of side effects (should have read the leaflet), most of which you seem to have had in short order.

At least you did not suffer the fate of some who promptly ended it all, perhaps because of the side effects or actually as one of them. So that's a relief then. Half life is about 24 hrs so you should get back to normal soon, but really there's not a lot you can do other than cutting down slowly and then stopping. There isn't really an easy way to stop; I've cut down hugely but not quite stopped yet.

Please don't do this again. Champix has not been a huge success so far as the patient is concerned, although it has made a lot of loot for Pfizer. It's only a partial agonist so it's success as a smoking cure was unlikely to be good. Remember in the US it carries a 'black box' warning about mood changes and suicidal tendencies.

Pity you don't drink, a little helps, but I suppose you'd become addicted to that as well!

CherryPie said...

One of my TU colleagues, a smoking addict gave up immediately after a chest infection.

My Dad gave up smoking, no meds, just cold Turkey. If you get your head in the right place you can do it! A bit like me and my shedding a few pounds (which I haven't quite managed ;-) )

So the bottom line is you can give up smoking and I can shed those few pounds. We just have to decide that is what we will do and keep focused on the goal.

Woodsy42 said...

I tried various ways over the years, the only one that worked was to to just stop. I started again 12 years later because I found I missed the relaxation of an after dinner ciggy and missed the choice of 'treat' behaviour.
I am convinced that the (supposed)addictive effects are mostly irrelevent and very minor. The drugs companies talk it up to brainwash people that it's hard and thus sell stuff to you. In reality it's mostly a behavioural addiction not a chemical one. Stopping is no harder than stopping biting your nails or stopping having sugar in your tea. You just need the mindset.

banned said...

I like smoking and have never attempted to stop; having said that I would never encourage anyone else to take it up if only because it merely funds our spendthrift robber government.

Angus Dei said...

Ta very much Blackdog, I really am too trusting:)

Thanks CherryPie:)

Woodsy42, stopped sugar and biting my nails years ago, seems this tobacco thing is a bit more difficult:)

Like your thinking Banned:)