Showing posts with label I love Blogger. Show all posts
Showing posts with label I love Blogger. Show all posts

Thursday, 24 January 2013

S'now recession: Irish leccy: “Hurry Up and Die”: la saleté françaises: Jet surfing: and some “funny” dummies.

More lack of warm than you could shake a set of long johns at, masses of white fluffy/scrapey scrapey stuff, minimum amounts of atmospheric movement and fuck all solar stuff as usual at the Castle this morn, just returned from the stale bread (£1.45) gruel (94ps per tin) and his Maj’s food run dahn Tesco, bought yet another “charity” fake pound coin for the pay me or stagger around with a basket trolley thingy (so far I have lost two) and his Maj is back to his old loony self.

And alien reptile in disguise George (I don’t have to worry about my gas bill) Osborne is lining up his excuses for his piss poor “management” of broke Blighty’s economy.
Apparently disruption caused by heavy snowfall across Britain could see the UK slip back into recession once again, in what would be an unprecedented setback for the economy.
Back in 2010 Osborne blamed the snow for the UK economy's poor performance in the final quarter of 2010 and he will probably do it again this year.
According to Global Insight's chief UK and European economist Howard Archer "Given the UK's ability to grind to a halt with even a flake, the snow has come at a very brittle time for the UK economy, adding to the headwinds that it is already battling against as it tries to avoid a triple-dip recession,"
2012 saw the double-dip recession begun in October 2011 continue for the first half of the year, before the three months to the end of September 2012 registered growth of 0.9% boosted by the Olympic Games.

Oh good, it was worth the twenty billion for the jumpy, runny, throwy, swimmy thing then......


Allegedly UK and Irish ministers will today sign an agreement that could see some of the world's largest wind turbines built across the Irish midlands.
Stretching more than 600 feet (180 metres) in the air, the towers are set to generate energy for millions of UK homes from 2017.
The UK government says the Irish power is a cheaper form of renewable than offshore wind.
Under the plan, a number of companies are seeking to erect hundreds of wind turbines across the boggy midlands of Ireland. The power generated would be transferred to the UK via undersea cables that would join the grid at two points in Wales.
One of the developers, Element Power, says the plan would save UK consumers around £7bn over 15 years compared to other renewable sources.
The developers also say that thousands of jobs will be created in Ireland and the economy as a whole will benefit.
But concerns are now growing that the turbines needed to provide the power will be of a size and scale not seen in Britain or Ireland before.
"They will be spread around 40 clusters in five counties," said Element Power's Peter Harte.
Because the bog lands are relatively windless, the company behind the scheme says they will need to stretch high into the sky to catch sufficient wind to generate power.

That’s Irish.....


The Japanese finance minister Taro Aso, who also serves as the deputy prime monster, had been in office little more than a month when he insulted Japan’s elderly on Monday, calling those who can no longer feed themselves "tube people,” and claiming that treatment for just one patient close to death can cost the government “tens of millions of yen” a month.

He reckons that he would refuse any treatment meant to prolong his life and “I would wake up feeling increasingly bad knowing that [treatment] was all being paid for by the government,” he said during a meeting of the national council on social security reforms. “The problem won’t be solved unless you let them hurry up and die.”

He obviously hasn’t learnt much since we kicked their arses back in 1945.

A new full course menu of dirt-inspired items at Tokyo French restaurant Ne Quittez Pas will set you back 10,000 yen or $112.
According to Japanese news site Rocketnews24, the chef at the restaurant once won a high profile cooking contest with his dirt sauce, so a full menu of soil-infused courses was apparently the next logical step. The dirt is a special black soil from Kanuma, Tochigi Prefecture and has been tested for safety and purity (yeah right).
The first course is a potato starch and dirt soup served in a shot glass rimmed with salt, and is reportedly way better than it sounds. Apparently it doesn’t have “a dirty flavour at all.”
The second course of salad with dirt dressing “tasted so little of the earthiness I was expecting that I’d kind of forgotten about that ingredient,” writes the reviewer.
And for the main course, “aspic made with oriental clams and the top layer of sediment, and a dirt risotto with sautéed sea bass and burdock root.”
Dessert is dirt ice cream and dirt gratin followed by dirt mint tea that reportedly looks like puddle water.

Oh num fucking num, still they could feed it to the non dying old farts I suppose.


The inventors of a jet-propelled surfboard so they are struggling to keep up with demand.
The Jetsurf is a cross between a surf board and a jet-ski and can reach speeds of 40mph.
The flat carbon fibre board has a 100cc engine attached to the back and features a 2.5 litre fuel tank.
Users stand upright on the board and use their body weight to steer it from side to side like a surfer would.
The craft sucks in water from the front and shoots it out behind, helping it to build up speed very quickly.
Meanwhile, an electronic leash which is attached to the surfer's wrist acts as both a throttle and an emergency kill-cord.
It was developed by and the company says it is struggling to keep up with demand for the £7,000 product.
Technician Ben Gibson said: "It handles like a surf board and the weight of it isn't much more than a kite board or a surf board.
"Out of all the sports out there it is actually closest to snowboarding, as you are not getting pulled around or waiting for waves like on a surf board.
"We make 20 boards a month, all handmade, and constantly have a waiting list for them."

Sort of defeats the object doesn’t it....

And finally: 

Here are a few pics of “funny” dummies:



And today’s thought:



Wednesday, 23 January 2013

The Grain train: Academic Twats: Toilet hostages: Three arses and an ass: Naked in the snow: Burning Brunost: and la puanteur françaises.

Lots of lack of warm, much less atmospheric movement, loads of frozen skywater and limitless amounts of lack of solar stuff at the Castle this morn, didn’t post yestermorn because of a “medical emergency”: his Maj decided to test out Newton’s law of plummeting fruit and fell out of the master bedroom window, he landed OK but smashed his face on a stone pot on the way dahn-blood, snot and drool in bucket loads.
Worried that he might have broken his jaw I got him dahn the Vets for a check up, and apart from a bloody nose and a “painkiller jab” he survived, and after giving the nice man £36 we went home and spent the day sleeping on the four-poster. 

This morn he is eating, doing his business and chasing invisible things around the garden, and apart from a slight limp from the jab is just about back to his “normal” self.

And Lovely Blogger has finally sorted out the IE picture upload thingy.


As he rambled on about Gord knows what with a bit about the EU and the next election, problem is I phased out after about three minutes and went to make a cup of coffee.

Anyone know what he actually said-or meant?


Is that five multinational company’s control 90 per cent of the world’s grain trade, charities called for fresh action to crack down on tax avoidance by global corporations, claiming that the lives of 230 young children could be saved every day if firms paid their proper dues in the nations where they operated.
The new campaign challenges U-Turn Cam to take the lead in championing measures to stop tax-dodging by companies, prevent farmers from being forced off their land and ensure western nations live up to their promises on aid.
More than 100 charities and faith groups led by Oxfam have formed the largest coalition of its kind since the Make Poverty History campaign eight years ago. They are being backed by the billionaire philanthropist Bill Gates and civil rights activist Archbishop Desmond Tutu.
Allegedly five multinationals – ADM, Bunge, Cargill, Glencore and Louis Dreyfus – control all but ten per cent of the world’s grain supplies.



Leading ‘academics’ have told Patrick McLoughlin, the Transport Secretary that pay as you drive road charging should be introduced to tackle congestion and cut carbon emissions.
In an open letter they warned that ploughing more money into Britain’s road network will only generate more traffic.
Signed by 32 leading transport academics including Prof. David Banister of Oxford University and Prof. Peter Mackie of Leeds, the letter called for a radical rethink of strategy by Whitehall.

Here we go again, a load of tossers that exist in their ivory towers in a city that hates motors think they know how to save the world by pricing motorist’s orf the road.
There are many solutions, one of which is to charge “normal” road tax for the first car registered at an address, charge double for the second car, triple for the third and so on, this would make people think twice about stocking up on transport and may even reduce the piss poor parking problems we all suffer from both at home and out and about.

Hundreds of Chinese factory workers angry about strictly timed bathroom breaks and fines for starting work late held their Japanese and Chinese manager’s hostage for a day and a half before police broke up the strike.
About 1,000 workers at Shanghai Shinmei Electric Company held the 10 Japanese nationals and eight Chinese managers inside the factory in Shanghai starting Friday morning until 11.50 p.m. Saturday, said a statement from the parent company, Shinmei Electric Co., released Monday.
It said the managers were released uninjured after 300 police officers were called to the factory.
A security guard at the Shanghai plant said Tuesday that workers had gone on strike to protest the company's issuing of new work rules, including time limits on bathroom breaks and fines for being late.
"The workers demanded the scrapping of the ridiculously strict requirements stipulating that workers only have two minutes to go to the toilet and workers will be fined 50 Yuan ($8) if they are late once and fired if they are late twice," said the security guard, surnamed Feng.

Good for them, especially the more mature workers as it can sometimes take more than two minutes just to “get going” when one is an old fart...


Three thieves who tried to burgle a shop had to abandon the raid - when their getaway donkey made too much noise.
The trio had to ditch their ill-gotten gains in the early hours break-in in Colombia after the donkey started braying and alerted police.
The group had stolen rum, oil, rice, cans of tuna and sardines from a shop in the tiny town of Juan de Acosta, reports Noticias Caracol.
They planned to load the goods onto ten-year-old donkey Xavi, which they had stolen earlier, and make their escape.
But it let out a series of 'hee-haws' and the trio decided to ditch the animal, which was still carrying the stolen items, and make good their escape.
Shop owner Fabio Orozco said: "They came through the roof to rob. They took rum, rice, everything."
The donkey was detained in the town police station for 12 hours until owner Orlando Olivares was notified and came to collect him.

Better than a burglar alarm, and it mows the lawn as well....


A new craze has emerged-getting naked in the snow, it all started when care worker Leanne Myers, 40, stripped to her undies to pose for a picture playing guitar in the snow with 25-year-old neighbour Danielle Smith.
In a bid to cheer up workmates Leanne posted the picture on a Facebook page she set up called “Wiltshire, let’s get naked in the snow!”
She also invited friends to strip off for their own goose-bump photos in the snow - and 250 people have taken up the challenge in just three days.
Leanne, from Durrington, Wilts, said yesterday: “It is totally amazing, I really had no idea it would take off like this.
“People have really embraced it, and a lot of the pictures are of friends of friends, but now there’s some coming in from people I don’t know.
“I’ve had interest from Abu Dhabi and America and people messaging me saying ‘we’re not in Wiltshire, can we send in a pic?’
“They are welcome from anywhere, as long as they are kept tasteful.”

Bugger, knew there would be a snag...


A truckload of burning cheese has closed a road tunnel in Arctic Norway for the last six days.
Some 27 metric tons of flaming brown cheese (Brunost), a Norwegian delicacy, blocked off a three-km (1.9 mile) tunnel near the northern coastal town of Narvik when it caught fire last Thursday. The fire was finally put out on Monday.
"This high concentration of fat and sugar is almost like petrol if it gets hot enough," said Viggo Berg, a policeman.
Brown cheese is made from whey, contains up to 30 percent fat and has a caramel taste.
"I didn't know that brown cheese burns so well," said Kjell Bjoern Vinje at the Norwegian Public Roads Administration.
He added that in his 15 years in the administration, this was the first time cheese had caught fire on Norwegian roads.

That looks something like my toilet deposit this morn, mind you if a bakers van crashed into it they could have Norwegian rarebit....

And finally:

A stinking cloud of gas has been hanging over large areas of England after a leak at a French chemical plant, sparking thousands of calls to emergency services.
The sulphurous stench - likened to rotten eggs - is said by officials to be completely harmless.
But police in Kent, Sussex and Surrey began to receive floods of calls from concerned residents on Tuesday morning - and by afternoon there were reports of the unwelcome whiff in Oxfordshire and as far north as Northampton.
The gas, called mercaptan, was accidentally leaked from a factory in the northern city of Rouen and before long had drifted over the English Channel.
It is sometimes added to natural gas to alert people to gas leaks
The National Grid, which would normally deal with up to 10,000 calls countrywide in a day, had received an "unprecedented" 100,000 calls by 2pm.
The stench was reported as far north as Northamptonshire
Sussex Police said: "The smell is from an additive to the gas which has an unpleasant aroma but is not toxic and there is no danger to the public."
The Health Protection Agency (HPA) said the gas had diluted since entering the air over England, and, although it may cause some people to feel slightly sick, it will dispel naturally.

I blame the French obsession with garlic...


And today’s thought:
Orf the menu