Showing posts with label bananas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bananas. Show all posts

Wednesday, 21 November 2012

Eastern promise: No satellite for crims (maybe): Airbag with a “car” inside it: Choccywoccy choo-choo: Facing the cameras: and The International Banana Club Museum.

More than a drizzle of skywater, less than 60 watts of solar stuff, much less than a Sandy of atmospheric movement and a definite lack of lack of cold at the Castle this morn, the saga of the study has finally ended, all I have to do now is sort out the three bin bags of “useful stuff” I have put to one side.


Allegedly the Conservatives and Liberal Democrats have taken more than £18,000 in donations from Huawei, a controversial Chinese company accused of posing a threat to US national security.
Apparently Huawei's UK arm paid more than £8,600 to send executives to a networking event at the Conservative Party conference, in the same week US politicians said its technology should be blacklisted from American government systems.
The company also paid £10,000 to the Liberal Democrats to sponsor a reception at its conference in Brighton.
Fuckwit U-Turn Cam has it seems secured more than £850,000 from donors who attended private lunches, dinners and parties at Number 10 and Chequers between April and June 2012. The Prime Minister has also hosted a dinner at Highclere Castle, the setting of television drama Downton Abbey.
Huawei, which denies any link to the Chinese state or posing any security threat, says it attended all three party conferences, including the Conservative business dinner in Birmingham.
A Conservative spokesman said the donation had been “fully and transparently declared to the Electoral Commission”.
“Huawei attended a dinner for which, under Electoral Commission rules, a proportion of the price paid was required to be declared,” he added.
A spokesman for the Liberal Democrats said: "The Company has donated to all three political parties, in our case sponsoring a reception at party conference. The donation was declared and approved by the Electoral Commission meaning it met all the criteria set down for political donations."

Oh well, that’s alright then...


All prisoners in England and Wales ‘could’ be banned from watching channels such as Sky Sports in their cells, a government minister has indicated.
Offenders in private prisons are able to access pay-TV channels for a small weekly fee, but inmates in publicly run jails can only watch free-to-air ones.
The latest figures available, for December 2009, show that 4,070 prisoners in contracted-out jails had access to such channels in their cells - about 40% of inmates who were then held in private jails.
Since then the number of private prisons in England and Wales has risen to 14, while the prison population has also increased.
The security firm G4S - which runs six prisons - said prisoners did not enjoy an automatic right to TV in their cells.
"The provision of in-cell TVs... is a privilege which has to be earned," a spokesman said. "Poor behaviour will result in its removal."

Oh well, that’s alright as well then-I can’t afford Sky stuff....


Hiroshima University-affiliated startup business Humanix has recently revealed a three-wheel electric vehicle, called iSAVE YOU, which is covered with an airbag-like cushion material that springs back to its original form after absorbing impacts.
And you could own one for a mere 790,000 yen ($9,740 USD).
Professor Tsutomu, president of Humanix, told Japanese magazine Sponichi Annex that “the car will be perfect for our rapidly aging society and that there are already many requests for it from the elderly and disabled.” The cushions covering the vehicle are made of a tent fabric and sponge, and will absorb shock waves in case of an impact, protecting both the passengers and pedestrians. The iSAVE YOU can run up to 30 km on a single charge and can be recharged from any regular household electrical outlet.

The iSAVE YOU vehicle can be registered as a Trike (a bicycle with a light side-car) and it only requires a single, simple (almost free) inspection and registration procedures at the Light Motor Vehicle Inspection Centre rather that the regular, instead of the regular “Shaken” registration which costs over 100,000 yen ($,1000+).

Spiffing, can’t wait, sooo excited….


Created by master chocolatier Andrew Farrugia, from Malta, this edible train model has set a new Guinness World Record the longest chocolate structure in the world. It measures a whopping 34 meters in length and features every detail of a classic steam-powered chuff-chuff.
Unveiled at the “Brussels Chocolate Week”, in Belgium’s capital city, this tasty masterpiece had everyone drooling. Made of 2,755 pounds (1250 kilos) of the finest Belgian chocolate, donated by chocolate brand Belcolade, this 34-meter-long steam train replica took Maltese chocolate artist Andrew Farrugia a painstaking 784 hours to complete.

Wonder how long it would take to eat it?


At least one law enforcement agency in San Diego is currently using software developed by FaceFirst, a division of nearby Camarillo, California’s Airborne Biometrics Group. It can positively identify anyone, as long as physical data about a person’s facial features is stored somewhere the police can access. Though that pool of potential matches could include millions, the company says that by using the “best available facial recognition algorithms” they can scour that data set in a fraction of a second in order to send authorities all known intelligence about anyone who enters a camera’s field of vision.
“Up to 4 million comparisons per second, per clustered server” — that’s how many matches a single computer wired to the FaceFirst system can consider in a single breath as images captured by cameras, cell phones and surveillance devices from as far as 100 feet away are fed into algorithms designed to pick out terrorists and persons of interest. In a single setting, an unlimited amount of cameras can record the movements of a crowd at 30-frames-per-second, pick out each and every face and then feed it into an equation.
Speaking to reporters with Find Biometrics in August, Rosenkrantz president and CEO of FaceFirst said that the system is already in place in Panama, where computers there process nearly 20 million comparisons per second “using a FaceFirst matching cluster with a large number of live surveillance cameras on a scale beyond any other system ever implemented.”

“Within just a couple of seconds whoever needs to know receives an email containing all the evidence and stats about the person identified along with the video clip of them passing the camera so they may be approached then and there,” he says. …


That’s us fucked in a couple of years then….

And finally:

It all started at a photography convention in 1972, when Ken Bannister, VP of a manufacturing company, passed out Chiquita banana stickers to people he encountered. The goal, he said, was simply to get people's attention and to make them smile. After all, what better way to garner a grin than by using the fruit that's "shaped like a smile."
Soon after, Bannister started receiving banana-related paraphernalia -- or "banana-phernalia" -- in the mail. Inspired by his banana publicity, and eager to keep people smiling, Bannister then began referring to himself as "Bananaster" and "T.B.," short for "Top Banana." The nicknames stuck and "Bananaster" eventually became the founder of the first ever International Banana Club.
Bannister received so much banana-phernalia that he decided to open the club's first and only museum, the International Banana Club Museum, in 1976. Today, the museum is home to 17,000 banana collectibles, all of which have been donated by members of the club. Objects range from a gold-sequined Michael Jackson banana to the world's only petrified banana. With so many objects, the museum holds the Guinness Book of World Record's title of "World's Largest Collection" devoted to one fruit.
Membership to the club is a flat rate of $15 and, just like Bananaster; members can come up with their own nickname. Additionally, members can climb up in social ranks; the more banana-phernalia one donates, the higher the "B.M." (Banana merit) they are rewarded, such as PHB, Doctorate of Bananistry Degree. Banana Club members are said to get extra discounts when presenting their Banana Card Clubs in public, though a simple smile is what the club strives for. And if the smile isn't enough, members can also brag about their fellow famous Banana Club-ers: Jay Leno and former US President, Ronald Reagan.

And their theme song:



And today’s thought:
Now that’s what I call airbags


Saturday, 8 August 2009

Saturday Snippets

Barking mad, Yellow peril, Prezza, Top Gear and Brits abroad

And here is the weather: sunny, warm and apparently there will be weather all day, and even all night so say the experts.

First up:

Across the pond in Three Rivers, Michigan a man has been arrested in for barking at a police dog. The Three Rivers Police Department said officers responded Monday evening to an apartment complex to investigate a suspicious situation.

Police said Wednesday in a statement a 26-year-old man in the area "began to torment" a police dog inside the patrol car by barking and shouting at it, causing the animal to become excited and "very aggressive."

The man was arrested and later released on bond. He faces a charge of disorderly conduct.

He was sent home with a bone, a stick and his walkies were curtailed.

The Crown Prosecution Service spent £20,000 on the trial of a man accused – and later acquitted – of stealing a 25p banana, it has emerged.

James Gallagher, 23, was found not guilty this week of stealing the fruit from an Italian restaurant in Birmingham's Bullring shopping centre before it opened at 8.45am on 13 March.

The two-day trial was heard in Birmingham crown court rather than a magistrate’s court – incurring significantly more costs for the CPS – because Gallagher elected to have his case heard in front of a jury. He said he believed that magistrates would have found him guilty.

Gallagher, from the Handsworth area of Birmingham, said after the trial: "It's shocking, it's just a waste of taxpayers' money. I cannot understand how they've got away with it."

The CPS defended its decision to spend around £20,000 on the case. In a statement, Martin Lindop, the district crown prosecutor for Birmingham, said: "It is not the cost of the item that determines whether we proceed with a prosecution, but whether there is sufficient evidence for a realistic prospect of conviction and it is in the public interest.

"In this case, we felt that there was sufficient evidence and it was in the public interest for the prosecution to proceed."

British Justice at its best

Prezza has come out fighting over climate change, Vital UN climate change talks in Copenhagen are likely to collapse unless rich nations agree a "social justice deal" built around equalising emissions per head in each country, according to the former deputy prime minister John Prescott.

Speaking to the Guardian, Prescott admitted that the formula would require far greater sacrifices by rich nations, especially the US. Prescott, one of three politicians to broker the original UN climate change deal in December 1997, is to become deeply involved in trying to ensure there is a successor to Kyoto.

He met leaders of Barack Obama's climate change team in Washington a fortnight ago, and is due to travel to China on 8 September at the same time as Lord Mandelson, the business secretary.
He will be given an honorary professorship at Xiamen University for his work on climate change.
Prescott will also stage an international conference from 28 September on the principles of a deal for Copenhagen, to be opened by Rajendra Pachauri, the chair of the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, and addressed by Al Gore. The conference, organised by the Council of Europe, will have 65 states present.

Prescott is also going to lead a Gore-style campaign in schools in October showing the film The Age of Stupid, starring Pete Postlethwaite, portraying a devastated planet in 2050 owing to world leaders' failure to act on climate change.

So he is flying all over the world, eating copious amounts of food and then telling the rest of us not to fly all over the world or eat copious amounts of food.......

There is a rumour about that Top Gear will not return after the last episode was shown this week, I hope it is wrong, what I hope will happen is that the presenters will be replaced with “normal” people.

The show used to be interesting, and actually was about cars, but it has degenerated into a farce, Jezza is about as PC as Hitler, and has managed to offend lorry drivers, pikies, and just about any other section of society that constitutes its audience.

All we get now is presenters playing with very expensive motors that are far beyond the means of the majority of motorists, trips to all parts of the globe paid for by the license payers, so that they can enjoy themselves, ridiculous road trips featuring ancient bangers (paid for by the license payer), and inane tests set by the producers (paid for by the license payer).

Jezza, the Hamster and captain slow have become arrogant and inane, and think they are very funny, not in my book, can we not return to the days when a car programme was about cars that we can actually afford, and give information that is relevant to us, and inform the license payer about said cars.

And finally:

A Greek woman appeared in court in Crete today accused of setting fire to a British tourist after he allegedly pulled down his trousers in front of her.

Marina Fanouraki, 26, was charged with assault after the incident in the holiday resort of Malia in which she is said to have poured a flammable liquid over the man and set fire to it with a lighter.

Stuart Feltham, 20, from Swindon, suffered second-degree burns and is recovering in a private clinic. He was reported as having suffered burns to his genitals, but the Foreign Office said it understood that his chest and abdomen were injured.

The story made headlines in Greece, where some have hailed the woman a hero. Tension between drunken British tourists and locals in Crete is on the increase. Only last month two British visitors were beaten up in Malia after one crashed a motorcycle into a supermarket.
Fanouraki, a student, turned herself in to police and she appeared in court in Iraklion, the biggest town in Crete, wearing jeans and large dark glasses.

She claims she was acting in self-defence and only threw a drink in Felltham’s face.

Her lawyer said: "He fondled my client's breasts and buttocks and she poured her drink over him and left. Shortly afterward she heard cries and saw her friends trying to extinguish him."
Fanouraki was given time to prepare her defence and will appear again in court next week. When she was released she was congratulated by passersby.

Feltham, a plumber who lives with his parents, was coming to the end of a two-week holiday on the Greek island with five friends when the incident occurred at the Stefanos Hotel, Malia, on Wednesday night. He had been out at a party and returned to the hotel bar.

His father said: "The hotel staff had been very good to them, and he wanted to buy the barman a drink and say goodbye. He was burned from his neck to his bellybutton, and his hair's been singed. He's fine now, and we've spoken to him. The doctors say he's progressing well, and he's in good spirits. We just want him home – we want to look after him."

Last month British officials launched a campaign across the Mediterranean urging tourists to drink sensibly and keep out of trouble. Hotels and bars in destinations including Majorca, Turkey and Crete are stockpiling leaflets, cards and posters produced by the Foreign Office that entreat tourists to "know their limits".

In Greece, where young British tourists account for more than 70% of consular cases, messages such as "drinking makes you more vulnerable to violent crime" have been put on beer mats.
A Foreign Office spokeswoman said of the incident in Malia: "We can confirm that in the early hours of Tuesday a British male national was assaulted in Crete. We understand he suffered burns. He has been receiving consular assistance."

Flaming hell!


Saturday, 21 March 2009


The sun is shining, the birds are coughing and the world is still an odd place.

UK team build robot fish to detect pollution yes, it has happened, Robot fish developed by British scientists are to be released into the sea off north Spain to detect pollution.

"In using robotic fish we are building on a design created by hundreds of millions of years' worth of evolution which is incredibly energy efficient," he said.

"This efficiency is something we need to ensure that our pollution detection sensors can navigate in the underwater environment for hours on end."

The robot fish will be 1.5 metres (nearly 5 feet) long -- roughly the size of a seal.

Just a couple of comments: is introducing an “organism” consisting of “pollutants” to monitor pollution a good idea?

What do they taste like with chips?

Saleswoman finds cocaine in box of bananas A stunned supermarket saleswoman stumbled upon 28 kilograms (60 pounds) of cocaine worth over a million euros (dollars) while unpacking boxes of bananas in southern Germany, police said on Friday.

The crates of fruit, flown in from Colombia and imported into Germany via the Belgian port of Antwerp, were probably mixed up when they were being loaded onto the delivery trucks, Ludwig Waldinger from the Bavarian police told AFP.

"Some dealers must have picked up the wrong boxes," he told AFP, adding that he would like to see the look on the faces of the drug dealers when they try to get their fix from the nutritious snack.

The 26-year-old shop assistant found the 26 packets of cocaine on Wednesday morning and immediately alerted the police, who are currently investigating the apparent blunder.

Maybe they should have been delivered to the pharmacy!

Baggy-trousered Aussie teen fined for cheeky flash An Australian teenager wearing baggy trousers and no underwear was fined after his pants fell down just as a female police officer was walking past, a newspaper reported on Thursday.

Trent Joseph Wroe, 19, was fined A$250 (119 pounds), and ordered to wear a belt, after the February 28 incident in Mooloolaba in the northern Queensland state, the Sunshine Coast Daily newspaper reported.

Police told a magistrate's court that Wroe deliberately bared his buttocks, but Wroe said he was wearing a pair of borrowed pants which were too big and fell down in the wrong place at the wrong time.

He said he would apologise to the police officer, and promised to wear a belt and underwear in future.

Going “commando” can be hazardous to your wallet.

Robber pulls bank job from comfort of his car PHARR — a bank robber in South Texas held up the place from the comfort of his car.

Police in Pharr say a man used the drive-thru lane Monday morning to rob Lone Star National Bank.

Police say the driver slipped a note to a female teller, who provided an undetermined amount of cash, and then he drove away.

Lt. Guadalupe Salinas says the man was alone in the car and did not appear to display a weapon. Salinas told the Associated Press there's no indication that the robbery was an inside job.

Law officers declined to release the contents of the note. Police are reviewing bank surveillance video.

The FBI declined comment.

I don’t know, what next-drive through food!

And finally a link to some commercials: YouTube, no children, fish, dogs or bears were harmed during the making of these ads.

Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.” Stephen Leacock


NHS Behind the headlines

Angus Dei politico