Showing posts with label breakfast. Show all posts
Showing posts with label breakfast. Show all posts

Tuesday, 4 March 2014

Global crisis caused by Crimea incident

Many, many units of lack of warm, just a whimsy of skywater, a butterfly's' cough of atmospheric movement and the merest glimpse of Dawn's crack at the Castle this pancake flipping morn.

All is well with poor old Angus, bits that should work are and bits that shouldn't don't, his Maj is full of the joys of something and the smart cat flap is performing within expected parameters.



Well it's finally happened, landlady Mrs Floppybits dahn at the Crimea pub dropped her breakfast tray causing a global crisis.

Much coffee was lost causing a surge in the price of the beans throughout the globe, her toast was lost to the hot liquid meaning that the cost of wheat soared, the spoilt milk caused Tesco to reduce the retail price of 4 pints, the boiled egg exploded which brought about a steep increase in the retail price of chucky ovals, which in turn made the price of fowl meat burst through the 5 squid barrier and spawned a frenzy of buying in the feather pillows and duvet market.

The broken cereal bowl made a huge dent in the floor tile industry causing the shares of B&Q to soar, which made the city panic over prices of wood, corn, cement, sheds, copper, brass, lead, plastic, furniture, garden tools, fencing and turfs.

This lead to a rest break being cancelled and caused the price of tea to rocket and the result was a slump in the Rupee, the marmalade was ruined leading to a torrent of bidding on the orange markets and the backlash was that Florida is now bankrupt and the American economy is on the verge of collapse.

Back in Blighty the city has stalled, with no commodities left to make a profit on our economy has dived back into the sewer and we are all stuffed, in fact the world is going to end tomorrow because some knob head has revived a thirty thousand year old virus found beneath the permafrost up Norf (and a bit more).


So there we are:-fucked, all because of a lost brekkie in the Crimea and the scaremongering of the media and twats that can't mind their own business and take a delight in winding up the world.



And today's thought:




Wednesday, 28 October 2009

Autobrekkie; wink wink nudge nudge; Ice cool; Rubik art; and Buckoff

Bribble factor 3 last night slept for eight hours and woke up feeling like a spring lamb, so I had one.

Work is continuing on the Anglish Dictionary, post later, that’ll teach you.

Petrol prices are at an all time high, Average prices at the pumps are now 107.14p a litre - beating the previous 2009 high of 107.03p a litre on September 9.

Diesel is also at its highest price of the year - averaging 108.40p a litre, the AA reported.

And it seems that Gord is officially backing Tone for the EU presidents job, maybe he is hoping for a job after the next election.

And a third item, it has been suggested by a reader that I should clone myself so that I will be available to blog for 24 hours a day-does anyone really want to have two Angus’s loose on the blogosphere?

First up:

Get a firkin life!

Some pilchard with far too much time on his hands has built a contraption that will cook a breakfast of sorts in Wallace and Gromit style.

Yuri Suzuki, 26, a design teacher in London, who worked at the Royal College of Art, made the 15-metre long device with fellow artist Masa Kimura, 28.

The machine was made in the Platform 21 exhibition centre in Amsterdam in the Netherlands and saw scores of helpers and other designers contribute.

It cooks up omelettes from scratch before toasting bread, which it can butter and add jam to - depending on taste.

And of course the early morning pick-me up of coffee is also available at no extra effort - as well as freshly squeezed orange juice.

And he said it should be possible for lazy people to come up with their own version of the device.

"If someone wanted to make one for themselves it might not leave you that out of pocket," he said.

"We bought a lot of the stuff from a car boot sale, so it didn't cost that much - in total the project was probably £900

Read the rest on the link if you want but a fifteen metre long £900 “machine” isn’t my idea of a nice relaxing brekkie in the Angus castle.

The Japanese manufacturer Masunaga, have designed spectacles to avoid "dry eye", an ophthalmic condition that can affect video gamers or those who work on computers for long periods of time.

The problem is caused by staring unblinkingly at a screen, which dries out the surface of the eye. When we're tired, we blink less frequently, although men typically blink every three seconds, while women blink every four seconds.

The glasses feature a clip-on device which monitors how frequently the wearer blinks. If the wearer goes for five seconds without blinking, the device causes one of the spectacle lenses to "mist up" by turning the ultra-thin liquid crystal sheet opaque.

This block's the user's sight in one eye, and encourages the blinking rate to return to normal, at which point the "mist" disappears, allowing the wearer to continue with their work.

The glasses can be powered via a rechargeable battery or the USB port on the user's computer, and cost Y40, 950 (£275).

Cheaper to put a post it note on the top of the screen that says “BLINK!”

Chewang Norphel, 76, has "built" 12 new glaciers already and is racing to create five more before he dies.

By then he hopes he will have trained enough new "icemen" to continue his work and save the world's "third icecap" from being transformed into rivers.

His race against time is shared by Manmohan Singh, India's prime minister who called on the region's Himalayan nations, including China, Pakistan, Nepal and Bhutan, to form a united front to tackle glacial melting.

The great Himalayan glaciers, including Kashmir's Siachen glacier, feed the region's most important rivers, which irrigate farm land in Tibet, Nepal, Bangladesh and throughout the Indian sub-continent. The apparent acceleration in glacial melting has been blamed for the increase in floods which have destroyed homes and crops.

Chewang Norphel, the "Iceman of Ladakh", however believes he has an answer.

By diverting meltwater through a network of pipes into artificial lakes in the shaded side of mountain valleys, he says he has created new glaciers.

A dam or embankment is built to keep in the water, which freezes at night and remains frozen in the absence of direct sunlight. The water remains frozen until March, when the start of summer melts the new glacier and releases the water into the rivers below.

So far, Mr Norphel's glaciers have been able to each store up to one million cubic feet of ice, which in turn can irrigate 200 hectares of farm land. For farmers, that can make the difference between crop failure and a bumper crop of more than 1,000 tons of wheat.

Great idea, reminds me of the James Taylor song-“Lord have mercy on the frozen man” click on the link nice gentle song to start the day.

The five members of the Cube Works art group, based in Toronto, spent two months making the mosaic, which measures 8.5 ft (260cm) by 17 ft (520cm).

The Rubik's cube replica of the 15th century mural, which is painted on the back wall of the dining hall at Santa Maria delle Grazie, a church in Milan, is thought to be the largest work of its kind.

Guinness Book of Records judges are understood to be investigating whether it breaks any records. It has also been reported that the new artwork has been sold to a prominent art collector in Florida.

Oh well as long as someone made money that’s all right then.

And finally:

From East a bit and up: A Polish man has finally cleared his name after an 18-month legal battle in which he was accused of kicking his neighbour's bucket.

Legal sources blasted the decision to prosecute Waldemar Wilk, 55, of Mikowice, for damaging a plastic bucket worth less than £3.

Neighbour Alicja Tomankiewicz had claimed that Mr Wilk had kicked the bucket so hard it landed on a bush outside their block of flats.

The case was referred to a municipal court, where he pleaded not guilty, claiming that Mrs Tomankiewicz was still using the allegedly damaged bucket.

He even presented video evidence - taken on his mobile phone - in court.

The court called a video expert, who testified that it was impossible to date the mobile phone footage which could have been taken before Mr Wilk kicked the bucket.

Legal wrangling held up the case and in April, Mr Wilk demanded an expert carry out an experiment to see whether a kick could damage a plastic bucket.

Despite being found guilty after the expert's evidence proved it could have been damaged with a kick, he launched an appeal.

This week, much to Mr Wilk's relief, his campaign for justice finally ended after a district court in Opole dropped the case.

"It should never have even begun," said the judge.

Well Buck Me!

Is it me or is the world getting weirder?




Angus Dei politico