Showing posts with label doomed. Show all posts
Showing posts with label doomed. Show all posts

Wednesday, 24 October 2012

Old fart’s fault: Henry’s party tips: Warm bike: Paranormal Madagascar: We’re all Doomed: and up and dahn in Paris.

Dark, damp, dubious and dodgy at the Castle this morn, taken the last of my anti falling dahn and laying in vomit pills, orf to see my general medic at 8.30 0f the am for a refill.


Old farts are to blame for everything, at a hearing in the House of Lords, “experts” from a London University and the Bank of England said that politicians will have made “winners” of older people and “losers” of younger people.
They said a combination of high house prices, rising government debt, unemployment and more expensive education mean young people are getting a raw deal compared with their parents and grand-parents.
“Current young people will be contributors to the public purse, whereas older generations haven’t,” said Professor James Sefton, an academic at Imperial College.
Said Prof reckons that those who are not old farts “should be angry and thinks the deal they are getting is poor,” he said. “There are a lot of transfers going on in the system that are from the young towards the old. The awareness of it is very poor but it will come out.”
And Dr Martin Weale, a member of the Bank of England’s monetary policy committee, said Britain will need to save more money in the medium-term to pay for the rising cost of the NHS and pensions, as people live longer and get more demanding.
Lord Bichard, a former senior Whitehall official, said older people should be less of a "negative burden on society" and face penalties like losing benefits if they do not “contribute”.
The ex-permanent secretary in the Department of Education and former chief of the Benefits Agency, said the elderly should get rewards and fines to make sure they are taking a more active part in their communities.
“Older people who are not very old could be making a very useful contribution to civil society if they were given some incentive or recognition for doing so.
“We’re prepared to say to people if you’re not looking for work, you don’t get a benefit. If you’re old and you’re not contributing in some way, maybe there should be some penalty attached to that. These debates never seem to take place.

On behalf of all old farts I would to say sorry to all those not of old fart status; sorry for working my nuts orf for fucking decades paying for your education and health service, sorry for paying 33% income fucking tax, sorry for paying 12 fucking percent mortgage rates, sorry for bringing you up so that you can live in our homes until you are forty fucking years old before you get orf your arses and find somewhere to live, sorry for feeding you, clothing you, keeping you safe and taxi-ing you around for fucking years, sorry for expecting you to do the decent thing and look after the elderly who actually know what poverty really is, sorry you voted in the fuckwits that have lied over Uni fees and sorry for living so fucking long.


Allegedly the Prince of 'take em from behind' and danglers has been entertaining Army pals in Afghanistan by reading out extracts from Pippa Middleton’s new book on throwing parties containing how to play skittles with a pumpkin at Halloween and recipes for Bonfire Night by Pippa. 29.
Pippa’s book — out on Thursday priced £25 — is subtitled A Year Of British Festivities For Family And Friends. She is believed to have signed a £400,000 deal for her ideas, based on experiences working at her parents’ online firm Party Pieces.

Interesting; I didn’t know Harry could read, it is rumoured that he has ‘A’ levels in art and geography which does make him qualified to colour in maps....


Towns in the Netherlands are considering a proposal to heat cycle lanes to encourage greater use of bicycles in winter.
The town of Zutphen in the east of the country is awaiting the result of a preliminary assessment before it embarks on a feasibility study next year.
The province of Utrecht is also considering the scheme.
The Netherlands has an estimated 18m bicycles for a population of less than 17m. There is more than 35,000km of cycle paths in the country.
The scheme proposes to use geo-thermal energy to prevent ice forming.
The idea has been provisionally costed at 20-40,000 Euros per kilometre (£26-52,000 per mile).
But the man behind the proposal, Marcel Boerefijn, said there would be savings from fewer accidents, less salt needed to grit roads and reduced car expenses.
Mr Boerefijn said it was possible that the final net cost would be less than putting straw down on the paths.
Arien de Jong, a spokeswoman for the Dutch Cyclists Unions said: "We are very excited about the heated paths, because they could prevent so much misery. If cycle lanes are frozen over for four weeks, that results in about 7,000 more accidents involving cyclists.

I’m exited too-not...


Petrified children fled a cinema in tears after bungling staff screened a horror movie instead of a family cartoon.
Dozens of excited youngsters ate popcorn with their parents as they waited for fun film Madagascar 3: Europe’s Most Wanted to start.
But their joy soon turned into utter horror when a dopey projectionist accidentally played chilling movie, Paranormal Activity 4.
The film opened with a flashback to the first Paranormal Activity – featuring a woman’s bloodied corpse being hurled at the big screen.
Natasha Lewis, who took her eight-year-old son Dylan Lewis-Gray to last Saturday’s 10am screening, slammed cinema bosses for the mistake.
The 32-year-old, from Bulwell, Notts, said: “I’m disgusted about it. I thought something didn’t look right when the film started.
"It was only about two minutes worth of the film but it was enough to scar the ­children for life.
“It’s a terrifying scene where a body shoots towards the camera. It’s enough to make grown men jump – imagine the terror for these kids.”
Around 25 families scrambled for the exit of the Cineworld theatre in Nottingham when they realised the movie was not Madagascar 3.
Natasha added: “All you could hear were children crying and screaming. Everyone was upset.
“I’ve watched a few horror films in my time – Paranormal Activity ones are the scariest since The Exorcist.
“Dylan doesn’t want to set foot in the cinema again.”

That’ll save on days out then.....


Apparently if we don't solve the problem of Fukushima reactor No. 4, which is on the verge of a catastrophic failure that could unleash enough radiation to end human civilization on our planet.

The resulting releasing of radiation would turn North America into a "dead zone" for humans... mutated (and failed) crops, radioactive groundwater, skyrocketing infant mortality, an explosion in cancer and infertility... this is what could be unleashed at any moment from an earthquake in Japan. Such an event could result in the release of 85 times the Cesium-137 released by the Chernobyl catastrophe, say experts (see below). And the Chernobyl catastrophe made its surrounding regions uninhabitable by humans for centuries.

"It is no exaggeration to say that the fate of Japan and the whole world depends on No.4 reactor." - Mitsuhei Murata, Former Japanese Ambassador to Switzerland and Senegal, Executive Director, the Japan Society for Global System and Ethics

Here's how this could happen, according to Mr. Robert Alvarez, former Senior Policy Adviser to the Secretary and Deputy Assistant Secretary for National Security and the Environment at the U.S. Department of Energy:

"The No. 4 pool is about 100 feet above ground, is structurally damaged and is exposed to the open elements. If an earthquake or other event were to cause this pool to drain this could result in a catastrophic radiological fire involving nearly 10 times the amount of Cs-137 released by the Chernobyl accident. The infrastructure to safely remove this material was destroyed as it was at the other three reactors. Spent reactor fuel cannot be simply lifted into the air by a crane as if it were routine cargo. In order to prevent severe radiation exposures, fires and possible explosions, it must be transferred at all times in water and heavily shielded structures into dry casks. As this has never been done before, the removal of the spent fuel from the pools at the damaged Fukushima-Dai-Ichi reactors will require a major and time-consuming re-construction effort and will be charting in unknown waters." (

Note: He says "10 times" the Cesium-137 of Chernobyl. Others say up to 85 times. Nobody is 100% certain of what would actually occur because this has never happened before. We are in uncharted territory as a civilization, facing a unique and imminent threat to our continued survival. And both governments and the corporations that assured us nuclear power was safe are playing their "cover my ass" games while the world waits in the crosshairs of a nuclear apocalypse.

Spiffing... I’m more worried about paying the gas bill.....

And finally:

Architects have created an interesting design for a possible new bridge in Paris … it consists of three inflatable doughnut trampolines.
The bizarre design was created as a response to an ideas competition for a new bridge in Pari - which will add to the 37 bridges which already cross the Seine.

A spokesperson for design firm Atelier Z√ľndel Cristea said: "It appears to us that Paris has the bridges and passages necessary for the flow of vehicular and pedestrian traffic across its waterways.

"Our intention is to invite its visitors and inhabitants to engage on a newer and more playful path across this same water. We propose, now, a distinctive urban feature: an inflatable bridge equipped with giant trampolines, dedicated to the joyful release from gravity as one bounces above the river.

Elfandsafety nightmare...


And today’s thought:


Thursday, 26 November 2009

Help!! I must be sicker than I thought

Having just got over the maybe Swine flu (perhaps) and taken the course of Tamiflu anti-virals I thought I was a safe, wrong. It seems that the system does not include telling one’s GP that one has had said Porkie flu (I think) and taken Tamiflu.

Because the “morning post” Ha firkin Ha has just arrived and amongst the bills and insurance offers there was an envelope from my esteemed GP surgery, which contained three pieces of type/printer written paper.

The first was an invite to have the “seasonal flu jab”, saying “While most healthy people can withstand a bout of flu, the elderly, those patients with heart or chest problems, and diabetic patients are all at risk of serious complications and a worsening of their medical condition.”

The second was from the Dept Of Half arsed ideas (DOH) offering me a grant from the ‘warm front team’ with a mention of the flu jab.

And the third was an invite from ‘all and sundry’ at the surgery to have an H1N1 Porkie flu jab.

And I quote “I would like to inform you that we are now in receipt of the H1N1 Flu Vaccine, your doctor recommends that you attend the surgery to receive this vaccine”, and a nice little leaflet stating that “Adults and children over six months of age who have a long term health condition including:-chronic lung disease, chronic heart disease, chronic kidney disease, chronic liver disease, chronic neurological diseases, diabetes mellitus and immunosuppression caused by a disease or treatment for a disease. For example, this may include people who do not have a spleen, and people whom are on immunosuppressant treatment or are taking high doses of systemic steroids.”

If I didn’t have the runs before I bloody well have now, I was unaware that I had any of the above mentioned diseases, my Doc certainly hasn’t told me, and I don’t remember any tests to confirm any disease, and I am fairly sure having a higher than normal cholesterol level doesn’t qualify.

So why am I in the priority group? What is it they are not telling me? Or does being 58 suddenly qualify me as “old”

Doomed! I’m doomed!




Angus Dei politico

Tuesday, 16 June 2009


Or at least we will be on the 21st of December 2012 according to the Mayan calendar, and the 400 foot phoenix crop circle in Yatesbury near Devizes.

The Mayan's believed civilisation exists within a series earth cycles of 144,000 days each with the 13th expiring in December 2012, resulting in Armageddon.

"The patterns are becoming more intricate with every find and it is exciting to think how they are going to evolve by the time we get to 2012."

Recent crop circles have included giant jelly-fish and one image discovered in Wiltshire in June which experts dubbed the most 'mine boggling' they had ever come across.

The formation, measuring 150ft in diameter, is apparently a coded image representing the first 10 digits, 3.141592654, of pi.

Yes and they could also be the result of several pranksters out late at night with no life of their own.

For the good of the many

Stoke Damerel Primary School, in Plymouth, have banned bananas because one of the staff is allergic to the yellow peril.

Children at the school have been unable to include the fruit in their packed lunches since 2007.
But after learning of the banana boycott, Vivien Pengelly, leader of Plymouth City Council, said she would ask officers to investigate.

Councillor Pengelly said: "This is the first I have heard about this and it does sound a bit over the top to me.

"It's my experience as a headteacher that when there are allergies in a school we encourage children to manage the risk around them. I shall be asking officers to look at this particular case again to see whether anything else might be done."

Luckily the member of staff is leaving the school in September, so bananas will be back on the menu, depending whether or not the new member of staff has any allergies.

How desperate are we?

Jeffrey Lawal Balogun, 23, had no thoughts of an athletic career when he chased after the 28 bus in Bromley Kent to be on time for college four years ago.

But his natural pace was noticed by a coach from a local track and field club who happened to be walking along the street.

She approached Balogun and put him in touch with Clarence Callender, one of Britain's leading sprinting coaches.

With his help, the runner is now ranked sixth in the country over 60 metres and hopes to compete at the London 2012 Olympics.

Balogun, who now lives in Mottingham, South London, added: "I never thought running after a bus would lead to all this. And the funny thing is, I missed it."

What next? Scouts watching yobs throwing bricks to recruit them for the shot putt?

Lazarus in Poland

An 84-year-old Polish woman woke up in a morgue after being declared dead by her doctor.

The emergency medical services became aware of the error when someone saw her body bag in the morgue moving, police said.

The woman, from the village of Jablonowo in central Poland, fell unconscious and her husband called an ambulance. A doctor from the emergency medical services pronounced her dead, January Majewski, a police spokesman said.

"A funeral company took the body to the morgue. Several hours later, a worker there noticed the bag containing the body was moving," he said. "He called a doctor who noted the woman's vital functions had returned."

The woman was taken to hospital in the nearby town of Zwolen and placed in intensive care, where she was said to be in a serious condition on Saturday. Police have launched an investigation.

The woman’s vital functions had never left here. Let alone returned.

And finally:

The dead centre of New York up for sale

The 13-acre (5.3 ha) Canarsie cemetery in New York's borough of Brooklyn, boasting space for us many as 3,000 more graves, is the latest and most unusual item on the city's real estate inventory.

But these are hard times for property sales in the United States, even in this specialized and undersupplied sector.

"We have sent mail to 40 cemetery operators. Ten people visited last week, and four are interested," Mark Daly, director of New York's department of administrative services, told AFP.

He declined to say how much money the city, which is the owner of Canarsie, was asking.

Unlike Canarsie, most cemeteries in New York are owned by churches, synagogues or private associations and are not run as businesses.

The only other city-owned cemetery is on Hart Island, the last resting place for paupers, prisoners and the unclaimed.

Daly said that now "the city wants to shed property that no longer fits our mission. Our mission is to support the city agencies that can be used."

New York won't let just anyone snap up a graveyard. Prospective buyers must be specialized in the field and agree to run the site under considerable business restrictions.

Though remaining places can be sold -- prices for graves averages at 5,000 dollars but can top 8,000 dollars -- the owner has no other revenue and is required to pay maintenance costs even after the whole graveyard is full.

However, even the quietest tenants need caring for and Canarsie may not be problem free.

There are problems with the high water table, with stories about wrong burial, bodies floating, etcetera, and one part of the cemetery was a construction dump site 15 years ago.

But at least the neighbours are quiet.


NHS Behind the headlines

Angus Dei politico