Showing posts with label idiot. Show all posts
Showing posts with label idiot. Show all posts

Tuesday, 17 February 2009


From Ananova

Motorist's wee mistake A driver in Italy stopped his car in Montemignaio to take a leak; unfortunately he had left the car on an icy slope, the vehicle slid down the slope and over a cliff, with his wife and children inside.

The car fell 50 feet before being stopped by a tree, luckily no one was hurt.

A police spokesman said: "He hasn't been charged with any crime but he's definitely going to get a life sentence of backseat driving from now on."

But it was only a piddling mistake.

Short-sighted farmer sets fridge alight a short-sighted Austrian farmer set his house on fire after mistaking the fridge for the fireplace.

He had left the fridge door open, and feeling cold decided to light a fire, he put the firelighters and wood in the “fireplace” and the fire took hold.

The 87 year old said he “will get better spectacles in the future.”

I would get a live in carer if I was him.

Man had tag fitted to false leg oh yes we are not immune, Bret Ravenhill who had lost his leg six years ago in a motorcycle crash was found guilty of Cannabis possession.

He was given the tag to enforce a curfew, the Group Four worker fitted the tag, unfortunately she failed to notice that the leg was made of metal, and was false.

Bret said “I didn’t break my curfew once, but I could have. But what if they'd done the same thing to an armed robber?

A Group 4 spokesman commented: "It would appear that in this instance the procedure has not been followed."

He was later told to hop it. (I know!)

From somewhere else

One law for some ROD Stewart was criticised last night after his vehicle was driven down a road which was shut for safety reasons.

On big match days, vehicles are banned from using the road for about 30 minutes because fans leaving Celtic Park stream out along it.A senior officer took advice by radio as the limo driver pointed out he had a VIP in the back and the officer waved him through.

The Celtic-mad singer decided to leave five minutes before the end of yesterday's Old Firm game to miss the crush. His luxury vehicle was halted at London Road in Glasgow by police who had closed the road five minutes before.

Chief superintendent Paul Main, of Strathclyde Police, said: "A decision was made in the interests of public safety."

Yeah right!

From the Metro

Sacked Thatcher compares Britain to East Germany Carol Thatcher has hit back over her 'Golli-gate' sacking and compared Britain with communist East Germany.

She refused to apologise for calling a French tennis player a 'golliwog' and claimed people were 'far too easily offended in modern society'.

The 55-year-old daughter of former Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher also branded the person who leaked her comments a 'bully'.

She was sacked from the BBC's The One Show for her off-camera 'golliwog' slur.

I have a fiver for a plane ticket for her to anywhere else but here, any one care to

And finally: From the Telegraph

Barack Obama sends bust of Winston Churchill on its way back to Britain
A bust of the former prime minister once voted the greatest Briton in history, which was loaned to George W Bush from the Government's art collection after the September 11 attacks, has now been formally handed back.

When British officials offered to let Mr Obama to hang onto the bust for a further four years, the White House said: "Thanks, but no thanks."

Now it is likely that Gordon Brown will offer a alternative symbol of Anglo-American fealty when he visits Washington to meet Mr Obama for the first time since he became President. Diplomats are still working to finalise a date for the visit which is expected in the final week of this month or early in March.

Yeah, probably a “bust” of an arse so that Gord can kiss it.

People have this illusion that all over the world, all of the time, all kinds of fantastic things are happening. When in fact, over most of the world nothing is happening.’ David brinkley


NHS Behind the headlines

Angus Dei politico

Wednesday, 12 November 2008

The Cupid Stunts Awards 2008

This seems to be getting a regular thing waking up with the hump.

The good bit is that I can vent my “hump” on Cupid Stunts in the news, so here goes.

Baby “P”s pointless and painful death, - BBC NEWS UK A short life of misery and pain

What the Firk was happening? Haringey social services had 60 chances to stop this needless torture of a baby. The social services say that they were not responsible and that the “parents” were.

What a surprise, “Not our problem” they were only responsible for the care and wellbeing of this child, it wasn’t their fault, it was somebody else’s.

There were obviously serious deficiencies in the “system” that lead to this horrifying and sickening result. The caseworkers and their bosses are responsible, nobody else; they had the means to protect this child and failed miserably to ensure a safe place was found. They certainly had the opportunities to ask the right questions, what they didn’t have was the child’s wellbeing at heart.

I am awarding this YEARS “Cupid Stunts” award to Haringey Social Services, arses should be kicked and heads should roll. If I could think up a worse award I would do so but cupid stunts will have to do.

From the Times-4,000 jobs go in a day as recession bites The “caring, prudent” Government will preside over the highest unemployment figures since 1998.

And the cause? Greed, and bad management, greed by the bankers and dealers, bad management by the Government by de-regulating the financial market and doing bugger all when they knew what was happening.

But it’s ok; there will be no redundancies among M.P.’s they will continue to collect their salaries and allowances, while the expected 1.8 Million unemployed will collect about £60 per week, and have to fight for a dwindling number of jobs.

Second prize in this years Cupid Stunts award goes to Gordon brown and his band of merry men.

Again from The Times-Cancer patients sentenced to an early death by bureaucrats By Russell Miller.

This is about my old favourite-N.I.C.E. refusing to fund life saving or prolonging drugs. The “loonies” have taken over the asylum, people are dying because somebody sitting behind a big desk who probably has “Private Medical Insurance” making decisions on who and when people should live or die. And keeps saying things like-“I understand what these patients are going through” BOLLOCKS, the “boss” of N.I.C.E. has not got a clue, cannot understand and never will until he is in the position that these Patients are.

It’s the usual thing with bloody bureaucrats they see a piece of paper with numbers on it and some pillock in a pin striped suit says “That looks like a good idea” and bingo, thousands of peoples lives are firked up.

They then get in their chauffeur driven cars, bugger off home and forget.

So guess who gets equal second in this years Cupid Stunts awards, yes N.I.C.E.

And finally third prize in the Cupid Stunts awards goes to-Lawyers. Not all lawyers but the idiots who succumb.

Long hours and stress drive lawyers to drink and drugs - Times Online

According to a survey due out this week-shows that alcohol abuse is “endemic” and use of hard drugs such as cocaine is becoming more prevalent, particularly in big City law firms.
One partner claims he knows “people who just make a phone call from their office and nip down to reception to pick up their delivery” — something that happens in every big law firm, he claims.
The survey, by the magazine Legal Business, also says that there is evidence of “cocaine clubs” in law firms' basements and of partner-led games of poker and taking cocaine with clients. But it also finds that law firms are ignorant or indifferent to the problem. One lawyer is quoted: “I spanked £100,000 on cocaine in one year and no one noticed.”

Long hours and stress are driving lawyers to drink and drugs in and out of the workplace. Personally I don’t give a shit if they fry their brains, but I do care if they are “under the influence” while they are dealing with clients.

These lawyers of course are saying that there is no back up to help them. Excuse me but WHO is “forcing” them to drink and take drugs, I presume that they are all adults and are capable of making their own decisions. They are supposed to be professionals and I am sure that many of them have seen the result of drink and drugs during the course of their work.

The easy answer is-if you can’t do your job without resorting to drink and drugs then get the firk out of it and do something else that can’t prejudice the chances of some poor sod you are defending.

Third prize goes to some lawyers.
And the best quote I have ever heard from a politician. John McCain (loved the "Die Hard Films") on the Tonight Show ""I've been sleeping like a baby, I sleep two hours, wake up and cry. Sleep two hours, wake up and cry."
Now there's a man with a well rounded personality.

I feel much better now.


Wednesday, 29 October 2008

Ross and Brand

I'm back, I said I would be.

Finally the DG of the BBC has got off his arse and suspended the pair of "entertainers" involved in the Andrew Sachs debaucle.

And about bloody time.