Showing posts with label jobsworths. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jobsworths. Show all posts

Saturday, 14 May 2011

Old Boy’s Club#1: Less for less in the NHS: Old Boy’s Club#2: Who’s who at No10: Pachyderm Poo: One way Jobsworth: and a Moggy Mugger.

Sunny, cold and calm at the Castle this morn, the kitchen is empty of any sort of fluff filled computers, but the Vista re-install has come back to haunt me-I bloody hate Vista. 

Because Blogger has been down, here is yesterday’s post because I can’t be bothered to sort one out for today. 

Rob a bank of £100,000 and you get a few years in the pokey, rob the public of £100,000 and you get suspended from Parliament for a week.

U-Turn Cam and Nick (kick me) Clegg have finally found something to agree on; they have called for the disgraced former Cabinet Minister David Laws to remain in public life after he was found guilty of using taxpayers' money to pay his boyfriend more than £100,000.

The backing for the Liberal Democrat came on a day that “Mr” Laws was handed the stiffest non-criminal penalty given to any MP caught up in the expenses scandal. Mr Laws, who has repaid more than £56,000, will be suspended for a week after being found guilty of breaking six different rules.

Voters in Mr Laws' Yeovil constituency are now considering an attempt to force another election, as the disgraced MP campaigned heavily on his apparently clean expenses record.

Yet the Prime Minister and his deputy took time out of an event to promote youth employment to speak warmly of the man who served alongside them in Cabinet for just 17 days before resigning after it emerged he paid his lover money from Commons allowances to rent a room in a house they shared.

Must be nice to have influential friends.

The number of patients being treated by nurses has shot up just as staff numbers fall, a new survey suggests.

The survey, conducted by health union Unison to coincide with 'Nurses' Day', paints a bleak picture of life in the NHS as concerns over the government's proposed healthcare reforms grow.

"The results of this damning survey are both sad and shocking," said Gail Adams, Unison head of nursing.

"Nurses and midwives see first hand the damage that the government's cuts are inflicting on patient care, so it is perhaps not surprising that 65% say they have considered leaving the NHS.

"However, nurses are clearly angry at the impact on patients, with 57% saying they would be prepared to take industrial action if patient care is compromised."

The survey, of more than 2,000 nurses and midwives, saw three-quarters of nursing staff say the number of patients they have treated has gone up, at the same time as 60% reported a drop in staff numbers.

Sixty-four per cent of respondents said safety and patient care and 78% said their employer was making cuts, with over a third reporting redundancies.

Only a quarter of those surveyed said they would recommend nursing as a profession.

Value for money; Or Piss Poor Policy?

The Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority (Ipsa) was established last year in the wake of the expenses scandal uncovered by The Daily Telegraph. It was set up following a lengthy independent inquiry.

But MPs have complained that the new system is too bureaucratic as they object to having to account for every penny of taxpayer-funded expenditure.

Adam Afriyie, a Conservative back-bench MP, has proposed an alternative system based on flat-rate allowances which has received widespread support throughout the House of Commons.

Many MPs are pushing for expenses to be replaced with a new flat rate allowance paid automatically without the need to provide receipts.

Value for money; or a load of thieving bastards?

Veteran MP Sir Gerald Kaufman has complained that he received a letter from 10 Downing Street signed by a fake official using a bogus name.

Sir Kaufman received a letter signed by a Mrs E Adams but, when he called Downing Street to speak to her, he was told she was a ‘computer-generated name’.

He told MPs in the House of Commons: ‘What extraordinary events are taking place in 10 Downing Street whereby they send letters from somebody who doesn’t exist and expect one to accept this?'

The letter - complete with bogus signature - later featured on Channel 4 News.

Commons speaker John Bercow said it was ‘peculiarly unfortunate’.

In a statement, Downing Street acknowledged the practice and revealed the use of pseudonyms was introduced in 2005.

It followed an official being tracked down and threatened at her home address.

I see that U-Turn Cam’s open government is yet to be implemented, I wonder if they use This.

You’d better take a seal-able plastic bag-Prague Zoo has started selling elephant dung to Czech gardeners to use as fertiliser.

About 200 1kg containers have been sold per weekend at £2.40 each, and sales have been so brisk they have expanded to weekdays. It is the brainchild of zoo director Miroslav Bobek, whose surname means dung.

At £2.40 per Kilo maybe they should adopt this idea at parliament. There is enough crap spoken there to clear the deficit.

A Traffic Warden eager to dish out tickets was caught by a shop’s CCTV camera appearing to ride his moped the wrong way up a one-way street.

Staff at the electrical store were stunned to see footage showing him apparently shaking his fist at people who pointed out his bad driving.

He is then seen ticketing cars on a single yellow line.

David Streadwick, 49, who witnessed the incident in Newham, East London, said: “If someone is employed to enforce the law, then they need to abide by it.”

Newham Council said it is investigating.

Never a copper about when you need one.

And finally:

An altercation between a Cleveland, Texas, man and his feline-foe turned so bloody on Friday that the man had to be air-lifted to a Houston hospital.

According to the The Cleveland Advocate, even the man's knife-wielding attempt at fighting off the animal left both he and the aggressive kitty severely injured.

The result was so gruesome that the man was taken to Cleveland Regional Medical Centre only to have doctors elect for more serious medical attention, calling in air transportation to Houston's Memorial Hermann Hospital.

As for the house cat, local game wardens Danny Diaz and Adam Broll were called in to take her to the Big Thicket Veterinary Clinic, where she was eventually euthanized.

See-U Pussy.

That’s it: I’m orf to have a look at the Crab Nebula.

And today’s thought: "We all get heavier as we get older because there's a lot more information in our heads." - Vlade Divac, Basketball player.


Tuesday, 15 March 2011

Piss Poor Policies Dave C and the NHS: Warmonger: No fresh air in Nevada: Croc of an excuse: Fine old Jobsworths: Moon snake: and The biter bit.

Quite clement at the Castle this morn, bit on the dewy side so there will be no trains running, with a touch of misty stuff but overall a decent-ish day; and “they” are threatening that the Unexpected Flaming Object will make an appearance later, I live in hope.
Turning off the mobile and unplugging the landline yesterday did no good at all; the portcullis was besieged by stressed out broken computer owners demanding instant cures for their self made cock-ups, I should have raised the drawbridge.

I see that it was third time lucky in the land of the mushroom shaped Sun; they have finally managed to nuke themselves properly.
After a fresh explosion rocked Japan's Fukushima nuclear power plant on Tuesday the operator said radiation levels around the site immediately after the blast, the third there, were rising fast but still far from levels that local authorities say would cause large-scale radiation sickness.
Authorities are trying to prevent meltdowns in all three of the plant's nuclear reactors by flooding the chambers with seawater to cool them down.

There may be trouble ahead in the Piss Poor Policies Coalition, Downing Street has ruled out "significant changes" to government NHS reforms following their rejection by Liberal Democrat members.

Delegates at the party's spring conference voted at the weekend not to support a "damaging and unjustified" shake-up of health services in England.
Plans include axing primary care trusts and strategic health authorities.
No 10 said it would not make large changes to the proposals, but added they could be amended by Parliament.
Lib Dem activists are angry about what they see as Conservative plans that were not included in the coalition agreement.
Yeah-like tuition fees and VAT; pot- kettle, kettle-pot.

PPP Dave C has warned that Time is running out for the international community to intervene in Libya, according to David Cameron, who warned that Colonel Muammar Gaddafi was seeking new arms to crush the popular uprising against his regime.
The Prime Minister told MPs that while world leader’s debated options including a no-fly zone over Libya Col. Gaddafi was making gains against opposition forces.
Revealing Britain's growing frustration at international indecision, Mr Cameron signalled that he was prepared to consider a no-fly zone without a new United Nations Security Council resolution.

Britain's growing frustration”? I’m not frustrated at all, at least not about Libya, and if we hadn’t been selling Gaddafi arms for the last 41 years or so maybe “we” wouldn’t be in this position.

Critics say a Nevada bill banning air fresheners and candles in public places would lead to stinky rooms and prohibit priests from using candles in Mass.
Las Vegas Democratic Assemblyman Paul Aizley on Monday presented the proposed legislation, which would set restrictions on pesticides, fragrances and candles to accommodate people with chemical sensitivities.
Proponents said air fresheners give them migraines or asthma attacks and prevent them from going to the movies or to restaurants. A cocktail waitress at a casino said inhaling the fragrances piped through the ventilation system felt like a concrete slab on her chest.
Critics counter the bill would affect everything from candlelit restaurants and weddings - not to mention unmasked odours in public bathrooms that would drive away tourists.

Seems that legislating for the minority is catching on…..

A Sussex PE teacher phoned in sick to say he couldn't make it into school - because he'd been bitten by a crocodile.
Scott Brand, 21, phoned Cumnor House School in Haywards Heath to say he 'needed a few days off' after the croc sunk its teeth into his left arm while he was on holiday.
The reptile struck in his native Zimbabwe after he and his friends decided to go 'croc wrestling' in Lake Kariba, reports the Daily Mail.
He said: "Unfortunately I had also been sampling Africa's finest lager all afternoon, making our plans to wrestle with one of the water's most dangerous predators all the more tricky.
"I saw a four-foot long croc and just jumped in and grabbed it. It went nuts and was really going for me and it eventually got a hold of my left arm and bit down.

And this Numpty is in charge of children……

A pensioner was fined £50 while visiting her father’s grave because she brought her dog.
Val Brogan, 65, told two police community support officers she had not seen signs banning the animals from a ­cemetery in New Moston, Manchester. Police said they had been asked to deal with intimidation with dogs and fouling but Val said: “They didn’t care about my feelings.”

Ah, the joys of the dead end Jobsworths.

A Central Australian man says he got the fright of his life when he woke up in the dark with a metre-long snake lying on top of him.
Bryan Groacke says recent rains and abundant mice have attracted a large number of snakes to the community of Docker River, about 670 kilometres south-west of Alice Springs.
"We've got brown snakes here running around the place everywhere," he said.
"But all I know is I woke up and I felt this really cold snake on top of me.
"So I grabbed it and threw it at the wall and [I did] a bit of a Michael Jackson moon dance there.
"I put the light on and realised it was a big carpet snake, so it wasn't so bad, but I learnt a few new karate moves that day."
He says the snake must have found its way into his house through a crack in the floorboards.

I have problems with things crawling up my crack as well.

And finally:

Model Orit Fox - Israel's answer to Katie Price - was handling a “normally” tame snake on Spanish TV when she attempted to lick its face.

Evidently finding this rather provocative,the snake reacted badly, clamping down on Fox's ample chest.

 Fox was rushed to hospital where she received a tetanus jab, but she suffered no long-term damage.
Unfortunately the snake did not survive, and died of silicone poisoning.
Fox is a major star in Israel and has undergone several operations to enlarge her breasts.

No shit! I suppose there is a moral here, but I can’t think of one…..apart from snakes shouldn’t go into Silicon Valley……

That’s it: I’m orf to wait for the lunar perigee.

And today’s thought: Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.


Tuesday, 15 December 2009

Poor peers; Climate Change (again); Cops gone for a Burton; Boaring Germans; Parody peril; and Sandwell jobsworth.

No sleep again last night, so I passed the time watching the last episode of Morse, QI, Have I got News, and the Buzzcocks which I recorded whenever they were on.

Another cold start to the day, but I have thrown caution to the wind and put the heating on, unlike the House of Lords where it seems that the peers are revolting

Peers have criticised some of the proposed reforms to their expenses - drawn up after claims some were abusing their overnight allowance.

Plans to cut the £174-a-night allowance to £140 but increase daily attendance fees to £200 were debated in the Lords.

One peer described the proposals, which also include ending claims for mortgage interest and first-class travel by spouses, as an "insult".

Peers agreed without a vote to back the plans in principle, but not the detail.

The review into peers' expenses by the Senior Salaries Review Body suggested daily allowances for office costs and food, worth up to £161.50, be replaced by a £200 attendance fee.

However it suggested peers should have to do more to prove their attendance, that mortgage interest claims on second homes be phased out and overnight claims be restricted to rent and running costs.

Like the MPs. If they don’t like it resign.


Surprise, surprise the wonderful, wonderful Copenhagen climate party has run out of good cheer.

Climate change negotiators have been working through the night in Copenhagen to try to rescue plans for a global agreement from collapse.

Heads of state start to appear in the Danish capital later in the day, ahead of a hoped-for signing on Friday.

But several issues remain to be solved ahead of the summit's climax.

Correspondents say suspicions among poor countries that rich ones are ganging up on them - which prompted a walk-out on Monday - remain strong.

Piss up and brewery come to mind.

First up:

Three policemen have been disciplined after four young women ran amok in a police station, dressing up in officers’ clothing before posting the pictures of themselves on the internet.

Officers struggled to regain control as the four, dressed in short skirts and low-cut tops after a night out, ran around secure areas in Burton upon Trent police station, Staffs, trying on hats, coats and boots.
They posed for pictures draped over squad cars, inside a vehicle and even in the men’s locker room.

When officers ordered the women not to take photographs “for security reasons” they were ignored.

Even when police managed to get the clothes back off them and entice them out of the station with an offer of a lift home, they found some more police jackets inside the vehicle and resumed their game.

The pictures were later posted on Facebook, the social networking site.

The high jinks began in unlikely circumstances: after two of the women were allegedly caught up in a fight involving other women in the town’s Barracuda bar on Dec 5.

Two of them were allegedly hurt in incident and were taken to the police station to be interviewed as victims, while the others went to give witness statements.

When one of them asked to wash some blood off her face, she was shown into a bathroom next to the locker area. She and her friends helped themselves to boots, reflective coats and police caps.

Police repeatedly tried to stop them, but their orders were “not heeded or firmly enforced”, according to an official police account of the incident.

The three officers were “advised about their conduct” and transferred to other parts of the county after an internal inquiry, a statement said.

Makes you proud, doesn’t it.

Prepare to be Boared, at least if you live in Darmstadt, south of Frankfurt.

German police have rescued four frozen walkers who called up from a waste container begging to be saved from roving wild boars

they received an emergency call at nearly 3 a.m. Sunday (0200 GMT Sunday; 9 p.m. EDT) from a man who said he and three companions had fled into the container after being surprised by a group of boars during a night time walk in the woods. He said they didn't dare to emerge.

A police statement Monday says that a patrol found the four shivering in the metal container and escorted them from the scene.

And the Boars? They obviously got bored and went away.

The North Face Apparel Corp. is suing parody company called The South Butt and the teenager who started it.

The lawsuit filed last week in federal court in St. Louis seeks unspecified damages and asks the court to prohibit The South Butt from marketing and selling its parody product line.

The North Face says it does not comment on pending litigation.

The South Butt’s attorney, Albert Watkins, says the company was started by 18-year-old Jimmy Winkelmann to help pay for college. It puts out products with the tag line “Never Stop Relaxing,” a parody of The North Face line, “Never Stop Exploring.”

The parody company sells T-shirts, fleece jackets and sweatshirts on its Web site.

No sense of humour.

And finally:

Alfred Turley, a disabled pensioner, was given a parking ticket for not displaying his blue badge - while he was in a council office having it checked.

The 71 year-old great-grandfather from Oldbury, West Midlands, was asked to show his badge at a parking control office in West Bromwich when he tried to void a previous ticket, according to the Express and Star.

Mr Turley, a retired steelworker who walks with crutches due to chronic knee problems, was inside the office for a matter of minutes, but returned to his car to find he had been issued with the £35 penalty notice by a zealous traffic warden.

He immediately went back inside the office to contest the charge, but was told by staff at the office that they were unable to void it, leaving him no choice but to pay the fine.

Mr Turley, a father of four who has been widowed for 23 years, said: “I couldn’t believe it. They asked me to fetch my badge and when I returned I had a ticket.

“I just thought they’d cancel it on the spot when I went back inside.

“But they said there was nothing I could do and I had to pay it.”

Mahboob Hussain of Sandwell Council said: “The gentleman could have parked in a bay where he did not need to display his badge.”

However, he said that the ticket would be voided if Mr Turley appealed.

The December Jobsworth award goes to West Bromwich council.


Monday, 14 September 2009

Monday, Monday

Not my normal offering today, but more of a plethora of subjects, some will say too many, but sometimes excess is good.

You may have noticed that my posts are not planned. And I try not to step on the toes of other bloggers, but I am sure CherryPie won’t mind too much regarding the photos, I would put a link but it seems that Cherie’s place has server problems.

We do have some of the usual subjects-Jobsworths etc, but there are some “interesting” subjects.

First up:

Nine year old Noah Bailey looked forward to his trips to a local pond with his Grandfather at the weekends to sail his model boat, until the Jobsworths struck.

A security man complete with the ever present walkie-talkie approached and asked them what they were doing, he then proceeded (in a westerly fashion) to tell them that the business park had rules (Which they hadn’t bothered to display) forbidding toy boats and paddling dogs.

And the reason for forbidding this dangerous sport? It frightens the fish.

So Granddad took the weeping Noah home, the “management” said "‘we have had quite a few people come to the lake to use their model speedboats which is unacceptable.’We have even had people paddling in the lake. Anything to do with the lake, we try to nip in the bud. 'However, if this toy boat didn't have a motor engine I can't see a problem. Personally, I don't see anything wrong with it.

'It seems a bit pathetic.'

Got it in one you Numpty.

It seems that there is no recession; especially where ex prime Minister’s wives are concerned, Cherie Blair is has apparently spent £250,000 on antique furniture for her country “cottage” (see above).

According to auction house insiders, Cherie has spent the past year and a half collecting Georgian and Regency furniture for the £5.75m home she shares with her husband, the former prime minister. The grade I-listed house in Wotton Underwood, near Chequers, was built in 1704 and previously owned by Sir John Gielgud, the actor. It has seven bedrooms, a 52ft double-height drawing room and ornamental gardens.

Last year she attended a private viewing of antiques and artworks owned by Charles Plante, an American art dealer. She took a particular interest in Regency and William IV period furniture, including a £25,000 pair of rosewood bergère chairs.

Since leaving office Tony Blair is estimated to have signed deals worth at least £10m, including a £5m advance on his memoirs. The Blair’s now have six properties — with two houses in London, two flats in Bristol and a home in Durham.

And I thought they were cutting back on “buy to let”.

170 years ago, in the summer of 1839, Louis Daguerre convinced the government of France to purchase his invention on behalf of the people of France. On 13 September 1839, the daguerreotype was first exhibited in Piccadilly, London.

Take a look, and while you are at it take a look at Ten photographs that changed the world there are pictures of 1972 Kim Phuc in a napalm attack in South Vietnam by Nick Ut, the Hiroshima Bomb, 1989 Tiananmen Square protest by Jeff Widener and others.


Tens of thousands of used-car buyers have unwittingly bought former rental vehicles from the official dealerships of leading manufacturers.

Some have paid thousands of pounds over the odds after being told that their vehicles had “one previous owner” when they were rented to multiple drivers.

Two of Britain’s biggest hire firms have used a “front” company and an abbreviated company name to register vehicles, meaning buyers didn’t recognise the previous owner on the registration documents.

Other buyers were told that cars were “fleet” vehicles, or owned by manufacturers, only to discover later that they were among the 400,000 ex-rental cars sold on each year.

The Office of Fair Trading (OFT) is carrying out an extensive investigation into the £35 billion used car market, which is focusing on dealerships. It is preparing to publish fresh guidance on when firms should be prosecuted for misleading buyers.

The Liberal Democrats last night called for legal action over “shady trading”. They said new regulations were needed to ensure every ex-rental vehicle was clearly labelled.

Motoring experts warned that consumers should keep an attitude of “buyer beware” and demand to know details of the car’s past before handing over money.

The most controversial cases involve cars that were previously hired out by National Car Rental, which is owned by Europcar, Britain's biggest car hire company, which has a fleet totalling 54,000.

The company registered vehicles in the name of Provincial Securities Ltd, a company it owns that did no business.

Dodgy used car dealers, now there’s a surprise.

And finally:

Tens of thousands of motorists fined for straying into bus lanes could have their money refunded as a result of a High Court test case next month.

It has been triggered by an independent adjudicator finding in favour of Shaun Duffy, a motorist from Kenilworth, Warwickshire, who received a £60 penalty charge notice for the offence.

Mr Duffy was one of more than 10,000 motorists caught straying into the bus lane in the heart of Oxford, earning the council £635,435 in fines.

However he complained that the lane was not clearly marked and his appeal was upheld by the Chief Bus Lane Adjudicator, Caroline Sheppard.

His appeal, in turn, has been challenged by Oxfordshire County Council and the High Court will give a "swift clarification" on the where the law stands.

The case revolves on how such lanes should be indicated. Normally the lanes are painted a different colour or the road clearly marked to show drivers where only buses are permitted.

But in some cities bus lanes are only indicated by signs, causing confusion among motorists and their plight was recognised by Caroline Sheppard in her most recent annual report.

"Adjudicators have commented in a number of cases that in a busy city centre drivers are all too easily distracted by the need to be alert to the movement of traffic and pedestrians and are then faced with a multitude of signs."

Announcing his decision to fast track the case, Mr Justice Blake, said: "It seems to me this case should be given priority, since it has potentially wide implications".

His final ruling is likely to affect motorists caught using bus lanes in a number of cities apart from Oxford, including parts of Brighton, Nottingham, Sheffield and Manchester.

The adjudicator's position was backed by the AA. "This ruling is an important victory concerning local authority enforcement of moving traffic offences which is spreading across the UK," a spokesman said.

Fingers crossed.




Angus Dei politico

Thursday, 20 August 2009

Perm that Jimmie, Bit Bike, Fat seats, ASBO artistes and Jobsworths

OK own up, who stole the Sun, come on I know one of you did it, it was there yesterday and this morning-gone. Nobody goes home until someone owns up.

First up:

What would you do if your hairdo wasn’t up to scratch?

Have a bit of a moan and ask for your money back or another coiffeur?

Not this “lady”, a furious customer had to be dragged off her hairdresser by police after her perm went wrong at a salon in Serbia.

Terrified Nevena Zivkovic dialled cops when hysterical Ruzica Radovic saw her bubble perm in a mirror after the treatment at a beauty parlour in Novi Sad.

Ruzica - who had to be calmed with a sedative at hospital - insisted she hadn't asked for curly hair.

A police spokesman said: "When we got a call from the shop we thought that there was a criminal in there attacking the staff.

"But instead what we found when we got there was an extremely angry lady who was unhappy with her hairdo.

"Our officers have had to deal with some very strange situations before but none of us can remember anything like this."

Shop owner Zivkovic said: "I am still in shock. She just went wild. If she was that unhappy she could have just said and we would have refunded her money."

Roller retard

A Chinese man was arrested for stealing a motorcycle - part by part over five years from the factory where he worked.
Zhang, an assembly line worker in a motorcycle factory in Chongqing, had always wanted his own motorbike but could never afford one.

He started stealing parts from the factory warehouse and assembling them at home in 2003, reports the Chongqing Times.

"I don't have that much money, so I came up with the idea of taking the parts home and assembling them on my own," said Zhang.

After five years, he had finally built himself a brand new SUV motorcycle and proudly started driving it on the road.

But, almost immediately, he was pulled up by police who discovered that he had no driving licence or paperwork for the bike.

Zhang admitted theft and was fined the equivalent of £440, put on probation for a year, and ordered to return the motorcycle to the factory.

Wonder what they cost to buy new?

Special chairs have been installed on trains to cope with rising obesity rates.

The blue-coloured seats are nearly twice as wide as normal chairs and can support even the bulkiest passenger up to 550lbs without breaking.

But baffled underground bosses in Sao Paulo, Brazil say they're being ignored by obese passengers, who they think are to ashamed to use them.

A sign above each seat shows a cartoon of a roly-poly passenger saying "Priority chair for obese people."

"It may be that they don't want to think of themselves as fat or they resent being put in with pensioners and the disabled," said one manager.

You think?

A pair of buskers who infuriated residents with their endless renditions of just two songs have been given ASBOs preventing them from playing in Moseley, Birmingham.

James Ryan and Andrew Stevens only know how to play 'Wonderwall' by Oasis and George Michael's 'Faith'.

Mr. Ryan, a guitar player, and Mr. Stevens, who would hit dustbin lids with drum sticks, had been playing the two songs to people in the Moseley area for the last 18 months.

Mr. Ryan, 40, from Edgbaston, Birmingham, and Mr. Stevens, also known as Andrew Cave, 39, of no fixed address, have been banned from entering parts of Moseley and playing musical instruments in public in the area.

The pair were also banned from begging anywhere in England and Wales.

They were warned they faced jail if they breached the two-year anti-social behaviour orders handed down on Wednesday by District Judge Qureshi at Birmingham Magistrates Court.

After the hearing, Mr. Ryan said: "The whole thing's about playing a guitar, it's a joke. Most people loved it."

Birmingham City Council said the pair stood outside various pubs in Moseley singing and begging, often playing from early evening into the early hours.

The pair also waited outside taxi ranks and cash points along St Mary's Row demanding money.

A pair of Numptys; and if you really want to ruin your day click on the link above the picture.

And finally:

Bin men refused to empty John Mason's wheelie bin because it contained apples which had fallen from his trees.

Mr. Mason, 64, cleared dozens of windfall apples and put them in his garden waste bin for recycling.

But when he later went to collect the bin he found it was still full and a sticker had been placed on top saying the bin was "contaminated".

Council officials ruled that apples are counted as "kitchen waste" instead of "garden waste" despite falling from his garden trees.

Mr. Mason, a retired businessman, condemned the workers as "bureaucratic idiots".

"I put the apples in my garden waste bin in complete innocence and put it out for the council to collect. I scratched my head and wondered what on earth the contamination could be at first.

Then they clarified it and said it was the apples."

Mr. Mason, of Connah's Quay, North Wales, was told that he had contaminated the bin as the apples were "food waste" and not acceptable garden waste.

"I put the apples in the bin along with weeds and grass cuttings. We all pay such a lot of council tax and could do without this petty nonsense. Bureaucratic idiocy like this annoys me."

But council official said apples are counted as foodstuff and not garden waste.

Andy Macbeth, Flintshire council's environmental services manager, said: "Spoiled fruit or vegetable peelings may have been inside a kitchen and come into contact with uncooked meats.

"It's difficult, if not impossible, for our operatives to determine whether spoiled fruit or vegetable peelings found in a brown bin have been in contact with other kitchen waste."

So from now on you have to grow apples in your kitchen and not in the garden, got that?

Well; I’m waiting.

Tuesday, 28 July 2009

Health and Safety, Ton up Harry, another lunatic, Feral Pigs and M&S

Weather is a bit better today, and so am I, and I didn’t grunt or oink once, but I have this hacking cough; must give it up: coughing I mean.

Anyway, first up:

Down in East Budleigh, Devon the Jobsworths are at it again, Mrs Voce ran a tea shop and as you do she put a sign out advertising the fact.

The sign was on an embankment with no footpath, and for a year all was happy in the cream tea paradise.

Until Devon County Council appeared on the scene and told her to remove it because of “health and safety” or to be exact “ a potential hazard to pedestrians”.

Within days of taking it down she saw her takings slump to just £8 a day, Mrs Voce, 46, said she is being left with no option but to close the Fancy That Tea Shop in the village of East Budleigh, Devon, with the loss of five jobs.

A spokeswoman for the council said: "The Highways Act guidance says that no unauthorised items, such as advertising boards, should be displayed on the pavement.

"But in Devon our policy is more flexible; we do allow authorised displays on the pavement so long as they are immediately in front of the business.

"However in areas where the pavements are not that wide it can pose a potential hazard to passersby. The council has asked businesses in East Budleigh to take in their displays and most have done so willingly."

So why don’t you give Mrs Voce permission you anal morons.

It seems that flying helicopters doesn’t give prince “H” enough of a buzz, so he hitched a ride with acclaimed motorcycle driver Randy Mamola at Donington Park.

He clung to Mamola as the 13-time GP winner pulled a wheelie in his Ducati before setting off on two high-speed laps of the Leicestershire circuit during a break in the racing.

Onlookers were amazed to see him pull on red protective leathers, boots and a helmet to test out the track at Donington, where he was attending as the guest of a friend.

A Royal spokesman said: ‘It was a private day out. The prince had a friend going to Donington and jumped at the chance to go."

Still you are only young once and I suppose he could put Gran in a sidecar.

American kayaker Tyler Bradt has set a new world record by plunging 186 feet over a waterfall in Washington State.

Pictures have emerged showing Mr Bradt as a tiny speck in a red canoe perched on the edge of the falls.

He was then swallowed up by the raging torrent of water which cascades down the side of the mountain. The waterfall is so high the spray it generates causes its own rainbow.

After landing at the bottom, Mr Bradt sank 20ft under the water and stayed submerged for seven seconds before he resurfaced, triumphant.

The only injury the 22-year-old suffered was a sprained wrist and a broken paddle as he fell for four seconds over Palouse Falls before reaching the bottom.

Shame that, it could have knocked some sense into the pillock.

Florida has its fair share of “nasties”-alligators, snakes and other assorted beasties, but the latest threat to humankind is SUPERPIG!

The 150lb animal has survived being shot with tranquiliser darts and a taser stun gun since it appeared in a park in the Cove neighbourhood of Panama City.

A group on the social networking site Facebook, called "the Pig of the Cove" and so far boasting 429 members across the US has chronicled the pig's movements.

Officials of Bay County Animal Control have been trying to apprehend it since February, but it has remained free - as its supporters would have it, snorting contemptuously at the shackles of government.

"Is the pig a symbol of our desire to live free of government controls?" asked Mary Sittman, a Facebook follower and estate agent, last week.

She said that the pig's independent streak appealed to people in the largely conservative region in the Florida Panhandle.

Other Facebook followers suggested it should be named the Freedom Pig though others have dubbed it Wilbur.

Animal control officials are less enthralled by the visitor.

They insist that they are not trying to kill the animal but only want to catch it before it hurts itself or someone else.

Officials said the pig charged them last Monday and nearly gashed their legs.

A day later, they managed to shoot it with four tranquiliser darts but said the pig simply looked as if it had had "a couple of good shots of tequila".

Animal control officers complain that their efforts have been hampered by people tampering with the traps they set for the pig.

"It's not easy. You have a 150-pound pig with an attitude," said Jim Crosby, director of Bay County Animal Control.

More than 500,000 wild pigs are now estimated to live in Florida.

Experts believe they are the descendants of European pigs introduced to Florida by the Spanish in the 16th century.

Although they prefer to run from danger, they can be aggressive when cornered and can cause serious injuries with their tusks.

How cuddly will they think it is when they all start coughing and sneezing?

And finally:

Marks and Spencer in Derby have demanded that a 28 year old shopper provide proof of her age before they would sell her a pizza cutter.

Jenny Palmer was asked for her ID at the checkout after she went to the retailer's Derby store to buy the £1.50 item.

"I'm only two years off my 30th birthday and hardly look like I'm going to go out and physically harm someone," she said.

"I told the checkout woman I was buying it because I was moving into a new house, but she said her screen was telling her to ask for ID. I think she could have used some common sense. I can't believe I had to go through all of that just to buy a pizza-cutter, of all things."

M&S insisted its employee was right to demand proof of age from Ms Palmer under the 'Challenge 25' policy.

Staff are required to ask for identification from any customer who tries to buy alcohol or a bladed item and appears younger than 25.

Computer says………..

Yes, I have the same problem.


Angus Dei politico