Tuesday, 21 July 2009

Choirs, Bricks, Falling cows, Saving Electricity and a cunning plan

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Wet, windy and cold.

First up:

We wish you a quiet lunch

Authorities at the Palace of Westminster have decided that choirs from his Hemel Hempstead will no longer be allowed to sing in Portcullis House at Christmas because they have been putting MPs off their lunch.

Tory Mike Penning raised a point of order with the Speaker: "For the last four years in the run-up to Christmas, choirs from my constituency have entertained in Portcullis House over lunch parliamentarians and staff and other members of the Commons authorities.

"Last week, out of the blue, an email arrived in my office saying this would be banned in the future as it was inconveniencing members of the House during their lunch.”

Mr Bercow said he was "not previously conscious" of the ruling and would investigate.

He told Mr Penning: "On the face of it, you and your constituents have reason to be disconcerted and I will certainly look into the matter."

What a bunch of miserable munchers.

Emergency escape

Bricks are be used in Chinese busses for passengers to use to break windows in an emergency.

The bricks, painted yellow with "emergency use" written on both sides, are stored under the driver's seat and under a rear seat.

"It's easy for passengers to spot them, and use them to break the window if something happened," said a spokesman for the Harbin Public Transport Company.

The company had stopped providing passengers with safety hammers to break windows as they were always being stolen.

"We don't think anybody will be interested in stealing bricks," the spokesman added.

Bricks have so far been installed on several bus routes in a pilot scheme in Harbin, the capital of Heilongjiang province, reports Northeast Network.

Funny that, in the UK we have busses with a thing called an “emergency escape door”.

Watch out, Watch out there’s a Heffer about

An American couple have survived unscathed after their minivan was crushed - by a Falling Cow, Charles and Linda Everson were driving back to their hotel when Michelle, a 600lb rodeo cow, landed on their bonnet.

Amazingly, the beast had fallen 200ft from a cliff.

Chelan County fire chief Arnold Bake said the couple missed being killed by a matter of inches in the accident near Manson in Washington State.

The pair, who were visiting the area to celebrate their first wedding anniversary, were taken to hospital but later released.

Unfortunately, Michelle was not so lucky. She had to be put down.

Big barbeque in Chelan County tonight.

Bright Sparks

The City of York Council to turn off street lights Paul Thackray, the council's head of highway infrastructure, says it would minimise the use of natural resources, cut the energy used to power lights, and reduce light pollution.

His report says Essex County Council last year agreed a similar scheme to turn off many street lights between midnight and 5am.

The idea is part of a 'sustainable street lighting strategy' to be considered by City of York Council's ruling executive, says the York Press.

Stumbling in the dark.

And finally:

A Cunning Plan

Ministers have been asked to consider closing schools this autumn to help curb the number of swine flu infections.

Amid predictions that the number of cases will soar as the school holidays come to an end, two infection experts have argued that a school closure programme could "break the chains of transmission" and buy time to produce a vaccine.

Professor Neil Ferguson and Dr Simon Cauchemez, from the department of infectious disease epidemiology at Imperial College London, also cited studies showing that closing schools at the height of a flu pandemic could cut the number of cases by up to 45%.

The report said as children appeared to be more susceptible to the current bug than adults; there could be "strong arguments" for ministers to revisit their policy on school closures.

"It is... hoped that closure of schools during the pandemic might break the chains of transmission, with the following potential benefits: reducing the total number of cases; slowing the epidemic to give more time for vaccine production; and reducing the incidence of cases at the peak of the epidemic, limiting both the stress on healthcare systems and peak absenteeism in the general population, and thus increasing community-wide resilience," the researchers said.

Schools Secretary Ed (scary eyes) Balls told The Guardian that there was "no longer" a case for closing schools to contain the infection's spread as the virus was already established in the community.

And kids never get together, or go to crowded shopping centres in the holidays do they?

Let loose the dogs of war! It is summer holiday time.


Angus Dei politico



Dr. Liz Miller said...

anything anything anything to get the spotlight of government incompetence. Why does anyone care if a bunch of schoolkids start sneezing - its called herd immunity.

As for the vaccine, what will that bring?? I wouldn't give it to my cats, let alone my family

angus said...


The plus side is that if they all catch it there will be space on the streets and in the shopping centres.

As to the "vaccine" no thanks, I would rather catch porkie flu than be a guinea pig for the Gov.

Phidelm said...

As for me, I am much more lovely hem hem, but a hell of a lot less temperate.
- Lights out at midnight? That'll teach the binge drinkers a lesson!
- Ha! Missile coos are mediaeval French invention (and ours are better than yours, cocorico!).
- I would PAY to avoid anyone/thing from Hemel Hempstead ...
-H1N1? The little buggers'll be dropping like flies anyway, which should reduce pressure of over-population + discrimination against the older worker as well. Is govt plot ... (;-0)

CherryPie said...

What a bunch of miserable munchers.

I agree! I have been carol singing whilst people have been dining and people usually love it. The local hotels used to ask us because they knew diners enjoy this sort of thing!

James Higham said...

"Last week, out of the blue, an email arrived in my office saying this would be banned in the future as it was inconveniencing members of the House during their lunch.”

Absolute morons banning this to try to kill off Christmas.