Crimbo spirit: Eurostate: Keep it in your pants: Sleeping Policeman: A bit more street art: and the Unipiper.

Vast amounts of scrapey, scrapey stuff, very little atmospheric movement, vanishing amounts of solar stuff and not even a vapour of skywater at the Castle this morn.

Just returned from the stale bread, gruel and his Maj’s food and Dreamies run dahn Tesco, even more infested with Crimbo interweb thingy robots than Monday, and the prices are creeping up as “that” day nears.

 

Staying with the Season of goodwill

Parents criticised St Ann's C of E Primary School in Rainhill, Merseyside, after it announced they must pay £1.50 to watch five to seven–year–olds in the play this week.

Rebecca Wilkinson, head teacher, defended the move, saying the play will be held in the village hall for the first time.

She added that the cost will include refreshments.

Mrs Wilkinson said the decision to move the nativity play to the village hall was taken because parents complained that the school hall was too cramped for the production.

She said: "This will be a community event and the charge is non profit–making.

"We are charging less than we normally do for the juniors' play and that cost will incorporate mulled wine and mince pies."

But one parent said: "We regularly put our hands in our pockets already and the school is not short of money. It just had a big fund–raiser."

Another parent added: "It's a bit 'bah humbug', if you ask me."

 

Ah; the old Bah-Humbug defence....

 

Right to bit to what is left of the Euro thingy

Allegedly Eurozone countries would lose the right to set their own budgets and end up surrendering economic sovereignty to Brussels under a blueprint to “complete” the European Union’s single currency.

A master plan for “completion of economic and monetary union” has been set out in a confidential document to be discussed by EU leaders at a Brussels summit next week.

In the nine-page paper, seen by The Daily Telegraph, Herman Van Rompuy, the president of the European Council – the monthly summits of EU leaders – charts a series of steps from ongoing financial reforms to overall political union for the eurozone. “The general objective will be to aim for a progressive pooling of economic sovereignty at the European level,” the paper states.

Mr Van Rompuy expects the EU to have agreed an “operational framework” to give the European Central Bank (ECB) the role as single eurozone banking supervisor by March next year, despite continuing splits between France and Germany over the policy.

Then, by 2014, the plan requires all eurozone countries to “enter into individual arrangements of a contractual nature with EU institutions on the measures and reforms they commit to undertake and on the means for their implementation”.

In the final stage, all eurozone countries will essentially surrender fiscal sovereignty with an “increasing degree of common decision-making on national budgets and an enhanced co-ordination of economic policies”.

 

I blame Osborne....

 

Left to the home of the law and the land of the knob

A US judge has ordered a man with nine children to stop procreating until he can afford to pay for them.

Corey Curtis, 44, of Racine, Wisconsin, was told to stop breeding as a condition of probation until he can financially support his nine children from six different women, The Smoking Gun reported.

Racine County Judge Tim Boyle sentenced Curtis to the rare punishment as a condition of a three-year probation order for failing to pay $50,000 in child support, plus another $40,000 in interest.

"Common sense dictates you shouldn't have kids you can't afford," Judge Boyle said. "I will make that a condition of the probation."

Curtis told CBS 58 that he planned to comply with the condition.

 

 

That’ll stop him lying around in bed....

 

Dahn to the place that is now called Mexico

 

A member of Mexico's Presidential guard flies off his motorcycle while leading the Presidential convoy when he failed to notice a speed bump.

 

Bet that stung....

 

From all over everywhere; some more street art.

 

 

 

And finally:

 

Left again to Oregon

 

 

Comes the Unipiper.

 

That’s it: I’m orf to batter the moon

 

And today’s thought:

That’s all I am going to leave you in your pocket

 

 

Angus

Euro empire: Not a bleedin clue: Lambo letdown: $1 history: Chevy comes home: and Brazil nuts.

‘Tis pleasantly clement at the Castle this morn, sunny, calm and dry, the elbow is getting worse and his Maj is up the flowering cherry tree.

Still here; it seems that Armageddon was yet another balls up by old fart Harold Camping

Oh well; third time lucky?

I see that yet another satellite has crashed and burned, this one is the German Roentgen Satellite (Rosat) which re-entered the Earth's atmosphere between 01:45 and 02:15 GMT this morn.

Experts calculate that perhaps as much as 1.6 tonnes of wreckage - more than half the spacecraft's launch mass - could ride out the destructive forces of re-entry and hit the planet.

It is not clear whether any pieces have yet reached the Earth's surface.

 Oh yeah-what’s this then...

And allegedly:

European Union chiefs are drawing up plans for a single “Treasury” to oversee tax and spending across the 17 eurozone nations.

The proposal, put forward by Herman Van Rompuy, the European Council president, would be the clearest sign yet of a new “United States of Europe” — with Britain left on the sidelines.

 Good.......

 

And apparently;

Dustbin diver Oliver Letwin is to beg the public for help on how to run the Government.

The Cabinet Office minister told Tory MPs earlier this year they would be “out of ideas” after 2012. Now, he and fellow Cabinet minister Francis Maude will launch a bizarre “tell us how” campaign, asking for advice on delivering better policies.

Details of the scheme emerged just days after Mr Letwin was photographed dumping sensitive ­documents in St James’s Park litter bins, across the road from his Whitehall office.

The Piss Poor Policies Millionaires Club Coalition gets even more Piss Poorer.

 

Over to where they drive on the wrong side of the road

A $400,000 Lamborghini was left a mangled mess after a test drive through the city went horribly wrong.

The prospective buyer was behind the wheel of the white Lamborghini Gallardo when he lost control of the vehicle, hitting a barrier on the Macquarie St entry to the Cahill Expressway about 9am yesterday.

Lamborghini Sydney salesman Ian Watts, who was in the passenger seat at the time, had the nerve-racking job of calling his boss and telling him about the damage caused to the luxury vehicle.

The front of the car was a complete wreck, with the impact ripping the front right-hand wheel from its axle and the bonnet from its hinges.

Lamborghini Sydney managing director Andrew Smith said that, luckily, the car was insured.

That’s another couple of Dollars on the insurance premium then....

And in Iowa

Those interested in buying Mason City’s historic Egloff House can get it at a steal for $1. But city officials say it will cost at least $300,000 to dismantle, move and repair the flood-damaged house.

The house, built in 1939 by Dr. William C. and Margaret Egloff, was damaged in the June 2008 flooding.

Last year, the city bought it for $314,000 through a government buyout program and has been trying to find ways of saving it ever since.

The Mason City Globe Gazette reports that a study team consisting of house movers, an architect, structural engineer, architectural historian and a contractor recently determined the house can be moved.

But to do that, the family room and garage would need to be detached from the main structure.

$300,001; cheap at half the price....

Still where they drive on the wrong side of the road

A Missouri man and his beloved classic car have been reunited 16 years after the vehicle was stolen.

Edward Neeley, of Jefferson City, Mo., picked up his red 1969 Chevy Camaro in Salt Lake City on Tuesday after tracking it down in Utah last month.

Neeley contacted Utah authorities after he saw the Camaro listed for sale online, the Deseret News of Salt Lake City reported (http://bit.ly/raLn1d).

The seller, Brent Dockery of Syracuse, bought the car four years ago on eBay and also is a victim, investigators said. He was unaware its vehicle identification number had been switched.

Davis County detectives obtained a search warrant and found the authentic VIN in the door panel, which confirmed Neeley's suspicions.

After an investigation, the Utah Motor Vehicle Enforcement Division returned the car to Neeley, who was determined to be the rightful owner.

Chevy chase?

 And finally:

Brazil has been invaded

A picture which purportedly shows an alien lurking in the Amazon is being put forward as evidence that there is supernatural activity on earth.

The image, which shows an unidentified being standing with its back arched a few feet from what looks like a floating orb of light behind a group of children, was apparently taken from video footage captured by two British tourists visiting the Mamaus region of the Brazilian rainforest.

The video was obtained by noted paranormal writer Mike Cohen, who says the area is known for its 'intense UFO activity'.

He said: 'This is highly compelling footage that will be hard to discredit.

'It comes from an area known for experiencing intense UFO activity. It is rather apparent that aliens are interested in this region due to its biological diversity.

'The area was also the focus of a high-level Brazilian government investigation known as Operation Prato, where the army was sent in to monitor and confirm an alien presence in the region.'

 Absolute bollocks-everyone knows that all the aliens are in the Houses of Parliament....

 That’s it: I’m orf to hunt for the Stuxnet worm. 

And today’s thought: Very funny Scotty . . . now beam up my clothes.

  Angus

Charity begins at the Jobcentre: In or out Dave?: Back in the bunker: Ferrari fishing: That takes the biscuit: and 'Ficken' schnapps.

Here we are again, the big blue thing is clear, the big yellow thing is out, but a tad nippy at the Castle this morn, the study is beginning to fill up with non working thingy’s, and I am orf to Tesco for the stale bread, gruel and pussy food run.

The holiday seems like a long time ago and his Maj is galloping around the garden like....well his Maj.

From this Monday morn tens of thousands of benefits claimants will be referred to food banks by the Government, which is worried that many Britons face a stark choice: starvation or feeding themselves by begging or stealing.

Jobcentres in England and Wales will refer the needy to charity-run food banks that will give them a food parcel. It is the first time in living memory that hungry people will have been passed on to charities in this way.

The move comes amid growing levels of food poverty, fuelled by rising food prices and high rates of unemployment. Under the scheme, people whose benefits have been delayed, or have been refused crisis loans, will be referred to their local food bank. A claimant will be limited to three consecutive referrals – each time giving them enough food for three days. They will be given basics such as tinned soup, baked beans, meat, fish and pasta. 

Ah, the caring, sharing Government, and just to put it in perspective.

Apparently David Cameron must call a referendum on Europe or face a rebellion from his own party and a backlash from voters, a leading back-bench Tory warns today.

Writing in The Daily Telegraph, Mr Pritchard says that the EU has become an “occupying force” which is eroding British sovereignty and that the “unquestioning support” of backbenchers is no longer guaranteed.

He says the Government should hold a referendum next year on whether Britain should have a “trade only” relationship with the EU, rather than the political union which has evolved “by stealth”.

And if we had some ham we could have ham and eggs.....if we had some eggs.......

According to “experts”

A dead satellite will fall to Earth in about a week.

Officials yesterday moved up their prediction for its arrival to Friday, September 23, give or take a day.

NASA scientists have calculated the satellite will break into 26 pieces as it gets closer to Earth.

The odds of it hitting someone anywhere on the planet are one in 3,200.

The heaviest piece to hit the ground will be about 159kgs (350 pounds) but no one has ever been hit by falling space junk in the past.

 

First time for everything....

Over to the other red bit on the map

The world's fastest Ferrari has wound up in deep water after spinning out of control in a road race in Canada after the driver confessed to a 'slight mishap'.

Zahir Rana was driving the 240mph Enzo in the Newfoundland Targa race when he lost control of it on the gravel surface.

The Ferrari spun 180 degrees before careering off the road into the water.

It then drifted back to shore, after being in the water for an hour, where it was hauled from the water onto a recovery vehicle.

Zahir, a supercar dealer from Calgary, Canada, says the custom-made 840bhp car only suffered ‘slight damage’ to the front bumper and wing and is repairable.

Apart from the slightly flooded fuel system....

A single biscuit from Ernest Shackleton’s Antarctica ­expedition looks set to make a packet at auction.

The Huntley and Palmers snack that stopped the explorer and his exhausted men starving to death in 1909 is expected to fetch £1,500.

It has somehow survived intact for an amazing 102 years since returning from the intrepid group’s hut on the frozen wastes near the South Pole.

Specially made for the gruelling trip and fortified with ­concentrated milk protein Plasmon, the biscuit helped keep up the men’s’ diminishing strength as they returned from their trip, called the Nimrod mission. One, Frank Wild, later told how Shackleton made him eat the snack daily to stay alive as they headed home from their failed bid to reach the South Pole.

The biscuit will go on sale at Christie’s in London on September 29. Spokesman Nicholas Lambourn said: “The biscuits played their part in the Nimrod expedition.

“A lot were made and this one survived for over 100 years.”

The highest price paid for a biscuit at auction was £7,637 in 2001. That was from Shackleton’s more famous Antarctic expedition in 1914.

Crumbs, that’s almost as dear as Tesco....

And finally:

East a smidge to the land of boring cars

A German drinks company has won a court battle to register the F-word as a trademark.

Liquor manufacturer EFAG will now enjoy legal protection of the brand name of its 'Ficken' schnapps.

Drinkers in Germany might feel a little embarrassed about asking for the drink - it is named after the German word for "f***."

But the manufacturer can take solace in the fact that the brand name is now legally protected.

EFAG took the case to Germany's Federal Patent Court after officials refused to register the name as a trademark, arguing that it was socially offensive.

Following its legal victory, EFAG now owns the 'Ficken' trademark for clothing, mineral water and fruit drinks, as well as alcoholic drinks.

In its ruling, the court explained that, although the name was unquestionably in poor taste, it was not "sexually discriminatory" and did not violate public morals.

Well...fick me....

That’s it: I’m orf to throw away the dark matter I have collected.

 

And today’s thought: Middle age ends and senescence begins, the day your descendant’s outnumber your friends.

Angus