Wondrous start to the light thing at the Castle this morn, sunny, warm, calm, I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I am expecting a skip load of broken what-knots, his Maj is in the garden and I have just returned from my stale bread, gruel and pussy food run from Tesco-still a shambles.
I see that Parents are being warned against buying potentially dangerous "bling" baby dummies decorated with beads and gems.
Trading standards officials say the colourful dummies, which are being sold online, present a choking hazard to a baby or small child.
No shit.
Poppy was the most popular name for both cats and dogs, according to a study of 36,000 pets. Molly, Charlie and Bella also appear in a Top 10 list.
Guilty....
Staff in England should use “reasonable” measures to remove disruptive children from classrooms, break-up fights and stop pupils attacking other teachers or classmates.
Teachers are being told to use force to physically control unruly pupils under a back-to-basics crackdown on bad behaviour in schools.
According to figures, major assaults on staff reached a five-year high in 2010, with 44 being rushed to hospital with serious injuries.
Almost 1,000 children are suspended from school for abuse and assault every day and two-thirds of teachers admit bad behaviour is driving professionals out of the classroom.
Under the rules, schools are told to:
• Consider calling in police to prosecute pupils who make serious false allegations against staff;
• Resolve the vast majority of accusations made by pupils within a month and ensures unfounded claims are not included in teachers’ records;
• Punish pupils for misbehaviour and bullying committed outside schools, including at evenings and weekends;
• Search pupils’ clothing, bags and lockers for drugs, alcohol, weapons and stolen goods without their consent;
• Consider forcing all pupils to undergo airport-style screening checks as they enter school even if they are not suspected of carrying weapons;
• Require all parents to sign “home school agreements” and apply to the courts for £50 spot fines or parenting orders if sons or daughters regularly misbehave or skip classes.
More than 1,000 fire fighters’ jobs have been axed under the Government's "savage" spending cuts, with fresh losses in the pipeline, the service's main trade union says today.
One in 10 jobs could go in the next three years, the Fire Brigades Union (FBU) said. More than 1,000 jobs were lost in the year to April, with hardest-hit areas including Scotland, the South-west, Yorkshire and the West Midlands, it said.
The FBU gave warning that the fire service would reach "breaking point" dealing with widespread incidents such as flooding. Its general secretary, Matt Wrack, said: "Fewer fire crews’ means it will take longer for the fire engine to arrive in response to a 999 call. There will be ever-increasing risk to life, homes and businesses... as the cuts bite harder year after year."
Ah: those halcyon days of burned out building, cats stuck up trees and flooded houses.
Indian elephants from a Hindu temple in Kerala are to be sent on month-long holiday package complete with massages and bath oils as they recover from their arduous labour.
The herd of 64 elephants from the Sree Krishna will be fed large quantities of food - enough for them to put on 700-800 pounds - and pampered.
Their 'spa' daily diet includes special rice, horse gram and turmeric in addition to a mix of multi-vitamins, tonics and mineral and liver extracts, all monitored by experts.
The entire elephant 'holiday' package costs the temple authorities over Rs 900,000 (£12,500) but additional funds were available should they be required for the highly revered animals.
Wonder if they have room for a Dei?
A Canadian man was charged with assault after he allegedly shoved a sheriff's car off his property with a forklift, police said.
The Royal Canadian Mounted Police said Wilfred Doyle, 45, of St. Andrews was charged with mischief and obstructing a police officer, as well as assault with a deadly weapon, after the run-in at his home last week.
The Mounties told the Canadian Broadcasting Corp. the law enforcement officer went to Doyle's place on Prince Edward Island to serve him a court order. Doyle turned the routine process into a confrontation when he fired up his tractor, which was equipped with a forklift, and pushed the car out of his yard.
Doyle was released after spending a night in jail.
They should have gone by Horseback.
A woman who was part of a female trio that used high heels to attack a city man at a church over a christening snub has been given a conditional discharge.
Gisele Kanganza Musau, 32, was placed on probation for 12 months Friday after pleading guilty to assault.
Court heard the dust-up at the Fellowship Baptist Church on April 4, 2010, was the fallout from Kanganza Musau's sister not being chosen as the godmother of a child being christened as the result of rumours being spread about her working as a prostitute.
The truth hurts, well stiletto’s do.
And finally:
A move to stop Launceston's town clock chiming at night is receiving support from nearby businesses.
Alderman Ivan Deal will present a motion at today's council meeting, calling for a review to examine whether the chiming should be stopped between 11:00pm and 6:00am.
Rob Matson from Quest Apartments says they have had to sound-proof some of the rooms.
"We believe guests should be entitled to have a good night's sleep free from having bells wake them up all night, you can hear it quite clearly through most of the city in the small hours of the night," he said.
In a letter to Council the president of the Heritage Protection Society of Tasmania, Lionel Morell, says Launceston citizens do not want the clock silenced at night, and asked the Council not to waste anymore resources on the matter.
Ding Dong merrily on high?
And today’s thought: VENI, VEDI, VISA - I came, I saw, I shopped.