Usual lack of warm, usual non movement of the atmosphere,
usual dearth of solar stuff and unusual amounts of skywater at the Castle this
morn.
Still applying coloured stuff to parts other paint pad
systems cannot reach.
Just returned from the stale bread, gruel and his Maj’s food
run dahn Tesco, what can I say...?
And his Maj has conquered Virginia...
The seemingly endless saga of foul mouthed Andrew Mitchell
drags on like piles on a chimpanzee, the latest instalment is that the Chief
Flogger will meet with “rank and file” coppers tomorrow to “decide his fate”.
Now:
If the psychotic cyclist had any gonads he would have done
the decent thing and walked away with his golden handshake firmly clutched in
his “non plebbish” hand, but it seems that like all arrogant Tory twats he is
determined to hang onto the “title” and prestige of his Piss Poor ‘job’ despite
being caught in flagrante delicto as it were.
If I were daft enough to use rude words and insults to a
member or two of the Peelers I would be whisked orf to the nearest nick in the
back of a transit faster than you could say “fair cop guv” and fined more than
a few quid for the privilege.
But it seems that “them at the top” are immune from the same
“justice” as the rest of us because “they” are obviously better than we “commoners”
and are able to take liberties with liberty with impunity backed by the second
highest “ruler” in backward Blighty.
So:
A hint to all those who occasionally visit the “seat of
Government” in an official capacity-you may have more money and power than us,
you may have spent your formative years being beaten and buggered in posh schools,
you may have the “right” contacts, but we are better people, we know what hard
work really is, we know what life is really like and we know that eventually
you will disappear from our lives while we continue to cough up endless amounts
of dosh so that the next lot of tossers can “lord” it over we “Plebs”.
I was sent this video in an email for “older people” on how
to “improve” my saggy, wrinkly old bum.
They are joking.... aren’t they?
For the first time in the history of the world yesterday an
Englishman was crowned World Porridge Making Champion.
Ben Horsburgh, who
was born in London but lives in Germany, took the title and the prestigious
Golden Spurtle at the 190th event held in Carrbridge yesterday.
In a bid to soften
the blow to Scots, Horsburgh, 45, said: “I’m from Scottish roots. I can trace
my family back to the 1390s to
the Peebles area. So I suppose today I was flying the flag for the old
country.”
He went on to
explain how he makes award-winning porridge in four easy stages.
“First of all you
must have a good pot. It is vitally important,” he said.
“Next choose the
oats that you like. Then keep stirring and add salt as you go along. Finally
keep tasting and when you like it, stop.
“It is also
important to be relaxed and tranquil when you are making it”.
Can’t afford the gas or time, can’t eat too much salt so I
think I will stick to Reddybrek.
Two 14-year-old
boys who stole some of their mother's jewellery to pay for visits to a brothel
have been charged with theft in Germany.
The youngsters sold
£2,500 worth of gold and gems for just £250 to a gold dealer in their home city
of Karlsruhe, say police.
They spent the
proceeds on pizza, kebabs - and two visits to a brothel in the city's red light
district.
Officers said the
pair had been caught in a "delirium of hormones", and had got only a
tenth of the value of the jewels.
"You could still
see the delighted smiles on their faces while they were being
interrogated," said police spokesman Ralf Minet.
"They've been
told that damages will be awarded against them and they will have to pay it out
of their pocket money," he added.
I don’t know; teenagers eh?
Smokers of the hubble-bubble water pipe have until Saturday
to indulge their fondness for sweet flavoured tobacco in Jeddah's cafes as the Saudi
city prepares to enforce a public ban on the habit.
A law against smoking the pipes, known in Arabic as shisha,
in public places has been in place for years in some other Saudi cities, but it
is only now being implemented in Jeddah, which is known as more socially
liberal than the capital Riyadh.
"It's a big problem for our cafe. More than 80 percent
of our customers come to smoke shisha. Now they complain as soon as they walk
through the door when we say we won't have shisha," said Ghassan Mohammed Mansour, the manager of Jeddah's upscale
Caffe Aroma in a phone interview.
English-language daily Saudi
Gazette reported on Wednesday that more than 35 businessmen with investments in
restaurants and cafes had complained to the city's chamber of commerce about
the ban, demanding it protect their interests.
The pipes have been banned on health grounds, alongside
other forms of smoking, with the Health Ministry campaigning for tougher
measures against the habit for years.
Shisha smoking is popular in Saudi Arabia, but it is frowned upon by clerics of the
austere Wahhabi school of Islam that dominates the world's top oil exporter.
Smokin!!!
And finally:
A German dominatrix has been forced to pay 200 Euros (£160)
to a local charity as a penance after her client, an undertaker, accused her of
hurting and robbing him.
Cologne district court spokesman
Dirk Esser said the plaintiff had accused the woman he hired for sex last month
of holding a kitchen knife to his throat before demanding his debit card and
PIN number.
The plaintiff, a 49-year-old
undertaker, also said the woman had detained him against his will for five
hours.
The German
court decided that it was impossible to know for sure what really happened
because both parties had consumed too much cocaine during their encounter.
It dropped the charges but
ordered the prostitute to pay the "penance money" to a charity that
supports crime victims.
The 35-year-old mother of four
has been in pre-trial custody for the past five weeks, but declined to be
compensated for time spent in jail, Mr Esser said.
The dominatrix denied keeping the man against his will.
That’s it: I’m orf to draw an ammonia
sensor.
And today’s thought:
Hope it's not too windy
Angus