Clegg on Social Mobility: Piss Poor Policies Dave C on Starey eyes Ball: Harrow-Boys: A puff too far: Cheap clothes: and “aircraft skin fatigue”.

Almost sunny again at the Castle this morn, nice and calm with a bit of non-darkness and the threat of a bit of warm stuff later, the kitchen is overflowing with dismantled computers and only another few days on the antibiotics- life is fun………

Over in the land of glowing fish

A growing number of export orders for fish from Japan are being cancelled by overseas buyers because of fears it could contain potentially dangerous radioactive traces.

Japanese seafood has been dropped from the menu at a string of high- end international establishments, including Zuma and Roka restaurants in London as well as at Shangri-La, the luxury hotel group.

The Japanese government has assured food safety levels of fish exports but this is failing to prevent companies from cancelling, according to Hiromi Isa, a trade office director at Japan's Fisheries Agency.

He added "Our test results showed no fish were contaminated by higher-than- acceptable levels of radioactivity."

Acceptable to whom?

And across to Gadaffi land

NATO warplanes killed around 14 rebels early on Saturday after a stream of anti-aircraft fire was shot in to the night sky.

The victims included medics and a patient in an ambulance, struck near the Libyan front line between rebel and pro-Gaddafi forces east of Brega.

The air strike was the first major friendly fire incident of the chaotic desert war since western aeroplanes joined the fight two weeks ago.

Does that mean that NATO planes have to shoot down other NATO planes for killing civilians?

It seems that what’s his name-you know the Lib Tory bloke

Nick Clegg is ready to use shock and awe to force social change, as a curtain-raiser, it was disclosed last week that the Government is to publish an annual “report card” on seven key indicators, ranging from babies’ body weight and the skills learned by five-year-olds to GCSE results and adult earnings. These, Clegg insists, will not be targets but “a series of dials”, a dashboard used to check on the nation’s social well being and to “trigger a reaction” when things go wrong.

You can read the rest by clicking on the link above if you have several hours to waste, but I phased out after the first three paragraphs, and to be honest I don’t give a Kangaroo’s cock.

Meanwhile Piss Poor Policies Dave C

Has branded Starey eyes Ed Balls “the most annoying person in politics” in a spontaneous outburst of annoyance during prime minister's questions, Mr Cameron interrupted his response to an MP so he could chastise Mr Balls for talking over him.

"I wish the shadow chancellor would occasionally shut up and listen to the answer," he said.

The Tory backbenches hooted with laugher, while Mr Balls smiled and reached across the despatch box to offer Mr Cameron a glass of water.

"I may be alone in finding him the most annoying person in modern politics," Mr Cameron continued.

"I've got a feeling the leader of the opposition will one day agree with me."

Doubt it: the most annoying person in politics to me is any one of the 650 money grabbing, useless, gutless pillocks who get paid just for turning up at the Palace of Westminster.

Up a bit to Harrow

Topless photographs of an art tutor at the £30,000-a-year private school have been circulating its classrooms, dorms and corridors.

Joanne Salley, 32, a former model and TV presenter, posed provocatively in just a tight pair of jeans.

The pictures were captured by a fellow teacher at the school, professional photographer Fiona Corthine, as first reported by the Daily Mail’s Richard Kay.

They are believed to have been taken on school grounds – in its art rooms.

The pictures were discovered by a pupil in the school’s photography laboratory – where they had been left on a memory stick.

They have been seen by the majority of the school’s 825 male pupils, its teachers and even its kitchen staff.


Pupils who forwarded these pictures to the Mail did so after censoring them with modesty boxes.

The images have even made it as far as Miss Salley’s former school – Merchant Taylors’.

Pupils first started to receive the pictures – on their IPhones and BlackBerries – last weekend.

Harrow staff, noticing a stir, were made aware of the scandal on Tuesday. 

They have since demanded that all pupils delete the pictures.

Any pupil caught circulating them has been threatened with immediate suspension.

The advantage of private education-our art teacher was a hairy arsed six foot four rugby player who looked as if he had been head butting a wall for ten years.

Left a lot to the lone star state

A Dallas physician is accused of trying to run over someone he allegedly saw smoking near his car.

Police say 54-year-old Dr. Jeffrey Reed Thompson faces a felony charge of aggravated assault with a vehicle.

Friday’s incident began in a medical office parking garage.

The 48-year-old smoker, Donald Zuelly of Rowlett, told police that Thompson told him he couldn’t smoke in the garage, yanked the cigarette from his mouth, threw it down and stepped on it. Police say Zuelly told the doctor not to touch him and threw down a soft drink can. Some liquid splashed onto the doctor’s pants.

Zuelly says Thompson then hopped into his car and drove at him. Zuelly scraped his arm trying to flee.

See. Smoking is bad for you, especially if there are morons with big metal motorised things around.

Back in light-ish, warm-ish Blighty

Allegedly one in four people has taken clothes back to the shop after wearing them on a night out, according to a new poll.

Research for shopping website VoucherCodes.co.uk found that more than a quarter (28%) of 3,000 people questioned admitted returning items of clothing for a refund after wearing them.

More than one in 20 (7%) confessed to doing it on a regular basis.

Glad I don’t buy clothes anymore……

And finally:

Many thousand feet above the land of the freezing and the home of the parachute

Southwest Airlines has grounded 79 of its Boeing 737 aircraft for precautionary checks after one made an emergency landing with a gaping hole in the fuselage.

The US carrier said engineers would be “looking for the same type of aircraft skin fatigue” in checks over the next few days.

About 300 flights have been cancelled as a result of the inspections.

Southwest Flight 812 from Phoenix to Sacramento, California, with 118 passengers on board, landed safely at a military base in Arizona on Friday.

There were no passenger injuries reported, despite the sudden drop in cabin pressure.

The airline said one flight attendant was slightly injured.

The Boeing 737 landed at 4:07pm local time after declaring an emergency, said Ian Gregor, a Federal Aviation Administration spokesman. The plane touched down at Yuma Marine Corps Air Station with a hole in the top of the aircraft.

"We do not know the cause of the decompression," Mr Gregor said.

It may have something to do with then bleedin great hole in the roof mate.

That’s it: I’m orf to explore life on Earth

And today’s thought: Given the capacity to be stupid . . . people will be.

Angus

The Cupid Stunts Awards 2008

This seems to be getting a regular thing waking up with the hump.

The good bit is that I can vent my “hump” on Cupid Stunts in the news, so here goes.

Baby “P”s pointless and painful death, - BBC NEWS UK A short life of misery and pain

What the Firk was happening? Haringey social services had 60 chances to stop this needless torture of a baby. The social services say that they were not responsible and that the “parents” were.

What a surprise, “Not our problem” they were only responsible for the care and wellbeing of this child, it wasn’t their fault, it was somebody else’s.

There were obviously serious deficiencies in the “system” that lead to this horrifying and sickening result. The caseworkers and their bosses are responsible, nobody else; they had the means to protect this child and failed miserably to ensure a safe place was found. They certainly had the opportunities to ask the right questions, what they didn’t have was the child’s wellbeing at heart.

I am awarding this YEARS “Cupid Stunts” award to Haringey Social Services, arses should be kicked and heads should roll. If I could think up a worse award I would do so but cupid stunts will have to do.


From the Times-4,000 jobs go in a day as recession bites The “caring, prudent” Government will preside over the highest unemployment figures since 1998.

And the cause? Greed, and bad management, greed by the bankers and dealers, bad management by the Government by de-regulating the financial market and doing bugger all when they knew what was happening.

But it’s ok; there will be no redundancies among M.P.’s they will continue to collect their salaries and allowances, while the expected 1.8 Million unemployed will collect about £60 per week, and have to fight for a dwindling number of jobs.

Second prize in this years Cupid Stunts award goes to Gordon brown and his band of merry men.

Again from The Times-Cancer patients sentenced to an early death by bureaucrats By Russell Miller.

This is about my old favourite-N.I.C.E. refusing to fund life saving or prolonging drugs. The “loonies” have taken over the asylum, people are dying because somebody sitting behind a big desk who probably has “Private Medical Insurance” making decisions on who and when people should live or die. And keeps saying things like-“I understand what these patients are going through” BOLLOCKS, the “boss” of N.I.C.E. has not got a clue, cannot understand and never will until he is in the position that these Patients are.

It’s the usual thing with bloody bureaucrats they see a piece of paper with numbers on it and some pillock in a pin striped suit says “That looks like a good idea” and bingo, thousands of peoples lives are firked up.

They then get in their chauffeur driven cars, bugger off home and forget.

So guess who gets equal second in this years Cupid Stunts awards, yes N.I.C.E.


And finally third prize in the Cupid Stunts awards goes to-Lawyers. Not all lawyers but the idiots who succumb.

Long hours and stress drive lawyers to drink and drugs - Times Online

According to a survey due out this week-shows that alcohol abuse is “endemic” and use of hard drugs such as cocaine is becoming more prevalent, particularly in big City law firms.
One partner claims he knows “people who just make a phone call from their office and nip down to reception to pick up their delivery” — something that happens in every big law firm, he claims.
The survey, by the magazine Legal Business, also says that there is evidence of “cocaine clubs” in law firms' basements and of partner-led games of poker and taking cocaine with clients. But it also finds that law firms are ignorant or indifferent to the problem. One lawyer is quoted: “I spanked £100,000 on cocaine in one year and no one noticed.”

Long hours and stress are driving lawyers to drink and drugs in and out of the workplace. Personally I don’t give a shit if they fry their brains, but I do care if they are “under the influence” while they are dealing with clients.

These lawyers of course are saying that there is no back up to help them. Excuse me but WHO is “forcing” them to drink and take drugs, I presume that they are all adults and are capable of making their own decisions. They are supposed to be professionals and I am sure that many of them have seen the result of drink and drugs during the course of their work.

The easy answer is-if you can’t do your job without resorting to drink and drugs then get the firk out of it and do something else that can’t prejudice the chances of some poor sod you are defending.

Third prize goes to some lawyers.

And the best quote I have ever heard from a politician. John McCain (loved the "Die Hard Films") on the Tonight Show ""I've been sleeping like a baby, I sleep two hours, wake up and cry. Sleep two hours, wake up and cry."

Now there's a man with a well rounded personality.

I feel much better now.

Angus