Thursday, 25 August 2011

Swiss cheese: Decorporn: Ca (t) cti: hanging on: White headed pants snakes: and Elfandsafety in Blighty.

Rotten weather at the Castle this morn, wet, warm and muggy, the study is empty of all things computerish, just got back from the stale bread, gruel and  food for the pussy run from Tesco-still can’t find anything and his Maj has taken to bringing me sticks from the garden so that I can throw then for him, I must stop feeding him dog food.

I see that the Piss Poor Policies Coalition Millionaires Club has done a deal with the Swiss WBankers to recoup more than £5bn in unpaid tax from Britons with Swiss bank accounts under a deal between the UK and Switzerland signed last night. Switzerland's strict secrecy laws have made it a safe haven for the rich, but the UK Government is cracking down on offshore tax evasion.
In 2013, the Swiss banks will hand over a one-off levy of more than £5bn to settle past tax liabilities of Britons with money salted away in the country.
From then on, Switzerland will impose a withholding tax of 48 per cent on income such as interest and 27 per cent on capital gains such as shares rising in value. It is unclear how much this will raise because some Britons may move their assets elsewhere.

 £5 billion....does that mean that next year’s cuts are orf?

And ex-Home Secretary Jacqui Smith is trying to justify using day-release prisoners to help paint her home because they “didn't have anything else on”.
The former Labour MP admitted that two inmates spent three hours decorating the detached property that she shares with her husband, Richard Timney. Questions remain about why the prisoners, who should have been doing work that benefited “the whole community”, were instructed to do the painting.
She resigned as home secretary in June 2009 after claiming expenses for pay-per-view pornographic films her husband had ordered.
It emerged that Ms Smith gave a number of plants to a programme at a local prison the day before the inmates arrived to offer their help. 

Oh well, that’s alright then-or will she claim them on expenses?

A bobcat, which clambered up a 15m (50ft) giant saguaro cactus stayed there for six hours to escape a mountain lion.
The bobcat refused to crawl back down for several hours, instead sitting on the cactus’s 5cm (2in) spikes. Amazingly, it appeared to have suffered hardly a scratch.
The scenes were taken in the Sonoran Desert, Arizona, by photographer Curt Fonger, 69, who said: ‘The mountain lion probably had cubs, the bobcat had intruded on its territory and she gave chase to warn the bobcat not to come close to her young family.

Lesser of two evils?

Scalextric tracks and Rubik’s cubes top the list of nostalgic toys Britons are hoarding in storage facilities.
Other 1980s classics - including Micro Machines and Sony Walkmans - are among the possession we cannot stand throwing away, it has emerged.
A survey of 1000 households by Access Self Storage found that Britons preferred to keep certain items rather than throw them away or sell them on eBay.
The most favoured were those with an emotional connection or a link to childhood - with toys from the 80s and 90s particularly popular in self storage.
Clothes that no longer fit but evoke memories featured highly, along with family photos and love letters.
Top storage items:
1. Nostalgia toys, first edition comics and brand memorabilia ranging from modern day Harry Potter collectables to "old skool" ranges from Star Wars, Rubik’s Cube, Barbie and Scalextric
2. Favourite outfits that no longer fit.
3. Photos of family and friends from Christmas and summers gone by
4. Royal memorabilia
5. Special edition newspapers and tribute magazines
6. Wedding dresses
7. Music cassettes, VHS and Betamax tapes and vinyl
8. Electricals including first mobile phones, old PC's and Walkmans
9. Love letters from ex-boyfriends and girlfriends
10. Greetings cards and birthday cards from the 80s to today


Police say an Arizona man stole several baby albino boa constrictors at a pet store by stuffing them in his shorts.
Eric Fiegel was arrested Tuesday after police reviewed surveillance footage from Predator's Reptile Center in Mesa. They say a July 30 video shows the 22-year-old man entering the store, removing several snakes from their cage and placing them in the pocket of his shorts before exiting the store without paying.
Police say Fiegel then travelled to another pet store and traded several of the snakes for $175 and a large reptile tank.

Nutter-one snake in the pants is enough for me.

 And finally: 

A list of Britain's daftest health and safety bans has been released - by the Health and Safety Executive.
They include bans on dodgem cars bumping into each other, school sack races and kite-flying.
Ministers have ordered a wide-ranging review and pledged to consolidate or simplify the law.
Butlins banned bumping on dodgems at its resorts at Skegness, Minehead and Bognor Regis in April over fears of being sued.
Schools in Oxfordshire stopped pupils using playground monkey bars unsupervised while a school in Merseyside banned leather footballs.
East Riding Council said it would fine kite-flyers up to £500 on Bridlington and Hornsea beaches because of the danger of kites hitting people.
Even the Royal British Legion made the list for not giving out pins to attach poppies, in case supporters pricked themselves.
And Wimbledon bosses featured for barring fans from watching tennis on Murray Mount after rain, in case they slipped.
Employment minister Chris Grayling, whose brief covers the issue, said: "This has to stop. These regulations are intended to save lives, not stop them."

No shit....

And today’s thought: "Eskimos are uncivilised because they don't have any shops." - Jodie Marsh



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James Higham said...

bans on dodgem cars bumping into each other

Who actually brings these ideas up? Who actually makes the decision?

Angus said...

your guess is as good as mine James, some knob sitting behind a desk bored out of his/her mind I suppose