Tuesday, 1 November 2011

DWP in the surgery: Up your debt: Crabby crab: Thick Knicks: and a smashing Taxi.


There is definitely meteorological activity at the Castle this first day of November, damp, dull and dingy, the study is partially crowded with ailing laptops and last night the dear little Kiddlies came round begging for stuff that will make them even fatter and rot their teeth.

So I left them a small bag of “goodies” on the portcullis, some nice Hot sweets out of the bag and some chocolate which will give them some exercise-isn’t Ex-Lax a wonderful invention....

 Also in Blighty:


Has got together with the Piss Poor GMC to harass GPs into “encouraging” patients with long-term illnesses to find a job.
The Department for Work and Pensions responded to a General Medical Council consultation to suggest that doctors should regard a patient returning to work as an “essential” indicator of successful clinical treatment.
Niall (dickhead) Dickson, the chief executive of the GMC, said the phrase was inserted because there was a lot of evidence that “productive activity can be life-enhancing”. “We don’t want to suggest doctors become policemen of the state,” he said. “It has to be where it is in the patient’s best interest that encouragement and support is given.”
A Department for Work and Pensions spokesman said: “Being in work is good for people’s health and well-being and most people with common health problems can return to work with the right support, which is why the department is committed to helping those who can work back into employment, while ensuring those who are too sick to work receive support.”

 Looks like there will be redundancies at the Job Centre Minus then...


And allegedly:


Britons have taken on the highest levels of debt since the height of the recession in May 2009 as they struggle to fund the rising cost of living, official figures have found.
Households have amassed £208.6 billion of outstanding debts in credit cards, bank overdrafts and other loans, equivalent to £9,070 for every household in the country.
In the past year household debts - excluding mortgages - have risen by over £5 billion, the biggest annual increase since the recession, the Bank said.
In the last month alone, Britons have increased their debts by £629 million.
Economists said that the figures show that people are having to borrow money simply to fund their day-to-day living in the face of rising inflation.  

No shit...



A man wearing a Russian soldier's cap was following a group of crabs as they walk alongside the curb of a rural road.
The man catches one of the crabs and holds it up to his face.
The crab clips onto the man's nostril, making him scream out in pain, but that doesn't stop the crab.
It continues to clamp down as the man's nose starts to turn white from the pressure
Though the first minute of the clip is the pursuit, the action comes in the last 15 seconds.


Go on have a laugh...




The government of South Korea has ordered all government employees to start wearing thick underwear—the high-tech thermal kind preferred—to stave off quickly rising energy consumption levels.
As of January 17th, public servants in South Korea must turn off all heating devices from 11:00am to 12:00am and 5:00pm to 6:00pm. In addition, at all other times the heating cannot be set any higher than 18-degrees Celsius, or 64-degrees Fahrenheit.
To prevent a possible blackout, the government is encouraging its employees to be extra frugal with their energy use. Long johns are okay, but thermal underwear is recommended. If employees are going to waste energy to stay warm, better they waste their own.

Sounds a bit like the advice given to those in fuel poverty in warm old Blighty.


And finally:



A drunken taxi driver was caught naked by police in Moscow following a rampage in which he smashed into 17 cars.
City police became aware of Vitaly Grodi's erratic driving after he ignored a road sign and refused to stop.
The driver bumped into 17 vehicles including a police van – reports The Russian News & Information Agency RIA Novosti
He also narrowly avoided hitting a school bus.
The driver was finally caught by officers who were shocked to find him in nothing but his birthday suit when he emerged from his cab.   
The taxi driver told police he was unhappy and had decided to get into his cab following an argument with his girlfriend.


Bet he wasn’t even wearing a seat belt.



And today’s thought: Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some hire public relations officers.


Angus






4 comments:

Reeceloui said...

As above give a different types of debt crises. I think it's give a good description of different types of debt matter like Britons have taken on the highest levels of debt.

Debt

James Higham said...

A Department for Work and Pensions spokesman said: “Being in work is good for people’s health ...

Are they deliberately misunderstanding the issue?

Welshcakes Limoncello said...

A tonic as ever, Angus.

Angus said...

Errr...?

Short answer-yes James.

Mucky Buckets Welshcakes:)