Royal read my post: Money for nothing: The door now landing in Washington: Tanks for the accident: Shotgun golf: and a really, really ugly piece of “art”.

Heaps of solar stuff, not a lot of lack of cold stuff, not even a promise of atmospheric movement and even less wet stuff at the Castle this morn.

I threw caution to the wind yestermorn and perpetrated a vast amount of vandalism on the garden, the hedges have been hedged, the borders bordered, the pots potted, the shrubs reduced in vertical distance and the moss mowed, unfortunately the wind returned the favour and now I can hardly move-ain’t gardening fun?

 

All across data protected Blighty

Allegedly if you are unfortunate enough to have to claim the pittance handed out to the not so well orf you should be prepared for your local postman Pat to open and sort your application.

According to the Independent confidential medical information from sick and disabled people applying for welfare benefits is opened and sorted by Royal Mail staff on behalf of the Government without the claimant's knowledge or consent.

The Department of Work and Pensions (DWP) routinely uses Royal Mail to process the thousands of benefits claims, including health data, it receives every day.

For example, people applying for sickness benefits such as employment support allowance (ESA) must first complete a detailed medical questionnaire explaining their conditions, prescribed medication and therapies, and the names and addresses of their doctors and nurses.

The form, which also includes highly sensitive questions about addictions and mental illness, is then posted in a pre-addressed envelope to the DWP or Atos Healthcare – the Paralympics sponsor paid by the Government to carry out controversial assessments of claimants' capacity to work.

However, it has emerged that these envelopes are routinely opened and the contents sorted by the Royal Mail, unless the envelope is specifically marked "private and confidential". In those cases they are sent to Atos unopened, according to the DWP.

The DWP said security measures were in place to minimise the risk of any data breaches, including CCTV in sorting rooms and procedures that mean at least two people open the mail together.

 

Which doubles the chance of your “confidential” information escaping the net....

 

And keeping the Piss Poor Policies Millionaires Club Coalition in the sniper sight

It seems that the reshuffle of the above’s sideboard will cost the taxpayer more than £250,000 in tax-free redundancy pay-outs.

The ministers will receive thousands of pounds each because of the decision by U-Turn Cam and what’s his name’s decision to over-haul the Cabinet two and a half years into the life of the Coalition.

Under the 1991 Ministerial and Other Pensions and Salaries Act, ministers are entitled to three months of their ministerial salary when they are forced out of office.

In the reshuffle 28 paid ministers and one unpaid minister lost their jobs – about one in four of the Government.

The payments are triggered if a minister has not found another role in Whitehall three weeks after leaving.

They range according to seniority, from £17,207 for a secretary of state to £5,924 for a Parliamentary under Secretary, the lowest paid ministerial role in Government.

The money will be paid tax-free because it is less than £30,000, the level at which at which tax starts to be paid on redundancy pay-outs.

Calculations by The Daily Telegraph suggest the pay outs to ministers will total £249,027 – excluding payments to special advisers who have lost jobs with their ministers.

 

But don’t forget-well, you know the rest...and I thought that redundancy payments could only be made on proper jobs...

 

Left quite a lot to the home of the plane and the land of a new president

The US Federal Aviation Administration has confirmed that a piece of metal that fell to the ground in a Kent, Washington, neighbourhood was part of a Boeing 767's landing gear door.

Witnesses said the refrigerator-size panel hit the ground and skipped about 30 feet before stopping in a street.
No one in the neighbourhood about 15 miles south of Seattle was hurt.

Neighbours said a cargo jet flew low over the area at about the same time the part came down.

Photos on news station KOMO's website show part of an identification plate on the object that has the word "aircraft" along with a serial number.

FAA officials are not saying if they have located the plane that the part came from.

 

Should be easy enough to find....

 

Right to the place where multi function knives are rife

A Swiss van driver had an amazing escape - when he survived a collision with an army tank.

Soldiers on military exercises in Unterrealta, Switzerland, had been controlling traffic to allow a column of tanks to pass through a junction safely.

But they failed to see the mini truck speeding through - straight into the path of a 15 tonne tank.

"He hit the tank and bounced off and rolled over three or four times before coming to a halt. It was a heck of a whack," said one eye witness.

Police say the driver and two passengers are recovering in hospital.

"Three men were injured. The military were in full control of the junction," said a police spokesman.

 

Or not.....

 

Left a fairway again to a fairway

 

Jeff Fleming, 53, of Reno is accused of opening fire with a shotgun on a golfing twosome, hitting one man who was treated at a hospital and released, police said on Friday.

Fleming was taken into custody at a local attorney's office where he fled following the shooting, Reno police said in a statement.

Fleming was booked into the Washoe County jail on suspicion of battery and assault with a deadly weapon late on Thursday and later released on bail.

Police say he opened fire at the 16th hole of Reno's Lakeridge Golf Course after one of the golfers shattered a window of his house with a ball. Fleming, whose home overlooks the course, had a verbal argument with the golfers before the shooting, police said.

 

Moral-if you don’t want golf balls through your windows; don’t buy a bleedin house next to a golf course....

 

And finally:

 

Back in conservation Blighty

 

A futuristic house which won the Royal Academy of Arts' prestigious architecture prize has been ridiculed by neighbours who claim it looks like a UFO and is still not finished after six years.

Residents living in Wood Lane in Highgate, north London, say work on the house has been going on since 2006 and that it still looks like a 'scrap yard'.

They are fed up that the house - which they say looks like a 'giant spaceship.....complete with UFO-style elevated gangway' - is making the street 'a mess' and forcing property prices down.

The house, which is in a conservation area surrounded by homes built in the late 18th century, was designed by architects Birds Portchmouth Russum (BPR) and is owned by partner in the firm Mike Russum.

Last year the design won the Architecture Prize at the Royal Academy's Summer Exhibition, which described the posh pad as a 'four-storey house (which) maximises the potential of a narrow infill site'.

But neighbours have this week slammed the house - saying it makes the prestigious road look a 'total and utter mess' with its fenced off entrance, scattered traffic cones and blue tarpaulin.

They are now demanding to know when the house - which is wedged between two existing homes - will be finished, six years since construction work began.

Neighbour Judith Steiner, who has lived on Wood Lane since 1970, said this week: "I originally supported the idea of having a home for the 21st century on the street.

"But work has been going on for years and now it just looks like a scrap yard surrounded by a chain link fence - it looks like something from War of the Worlds."

Another neighbour, who has lived in the street for the past 10 years but who did not want to be named, said: "It looks like a giant UFO just about to land.

Owner Mike Russum blamed planning laws, which he says delayed the completion of the house.

 

Should be finished really quickly now then...still bloody ugly though....

 

That’s it: I’m orf to prick the Heisenberg uncertainty principle

 

And today’s thought:

 

No she went to Vegas on her own....

 

Angus  

Greedy bastards: Ex Nazi goes green: Flock orf Putin: Sad cow: and Nork squeezing.

More than a lot of solar stuff, not a jot of wet stuff, nary a whimsy of atmospheric movement and quite a bundle of lack of cold stuff at the Castle this morn.

After a week on the industrial antibiotics the face is still hurting, but at least the side effects have eased orf a bit, the good bit is that I have caught up on a few months sleep.

The garden is in need of an enormous amount of fettling-sod that....and today is a tentative attempt at a post, time will tell...

And a huge thank you for the good wishes.

 

I see that the other big sporty thing up in the Smoke is still in motion

Apparently the sporty people with some bits missing or not working is going well, apart from some Sarf African who is Pissedorfius about other blade runners being quicker than him, oh dear what a shame. 

I wonder how they would do on the ATOS “fit for work” thingy?

 

Still in the capitol and across to the leaning tower of Westminster

 

U-Turn Cam has reshuffled the cards in his Millionaires Club sideboard; unfortunately he has kept the dog eared Jokers.

And allegedly MPs' expenses claims have risen by a quarter last year to nearly £90 million, The Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority (Ipsa) insisted that the rate of claims had remained "stable".

The total outlay for 2010-11 had been £71 million, and IPSA pointed out this was lower because of the impact of the general election.

Altogether, the 650 MPs were handed £89.4 million in 2011-12.

Some 50 iPads were purchased, along with a variety of Apple accessories.

The top three claimants were Liberal Democrats – Greg Mulholland, Stephen Gilbert and Alistair Carmichael. Mr Mulholland, who received £188,783.38 in staffing salary and expenses, said his costs were higher than usual because of staff suffering health problems. As the MP for Orkney and Shetlands, Mr Carmichael's travel expenses are unusually high.

MPs spent £6,401,099 on accommodation costs.

The former Prime Minister Gordon Brown received £127,197 in expenses and staffing costs. Mr Brown claimed £13,458 in travelling costs, despite speaking in Parliament only three times since the 2010 election.

The Prime Monster U-Turn Cam claimed £5,617, most of which covered office costs.

The Chancellor George Osborne received £9,715.04, which was mainly spent on travelling to and from his constituency in Tatton.

Dozens of MPs have continued to claim the cost of their mortgage interest, a system which is due to be phased out. In total, they claimed £353,646 to cover the cost of their mortgage interest.

 

And so it goes on...and on....and on...and......

 

Right a bit to the land of a country within a country

 

Ex Nazi El Papa Pope Benedict XVI has been presented with an electric car to use within the grounds of the Vatican and his summer home of Castel Gandolfo.

The customised white Kangoo was presented to the pontiff by French carmaker Renault.

Renault said the Kangoo Maxi van, which has the Papal coat of arms on its doors, has a 44 kilowatt electric motor and lithium-ion battery and can travel 170km (105 miles) without recharging.

Renault also handed over a second car, which is blue, to be used by the Vatican's police force.

The vehicles were presented to the Pope on Wednesday at Castel Gandolfo, in the Alban Hills south of Rome, by Renault chairman Carlos Ghosn, before being unveiled to the press on Thursday.

The Pope used his new car on Wednesday to travel from the helipad at Castel Gandolfo through the gardens back to his palazzo, the Vatican said.

 

Very “green” apart from the Helicopter....creepy old fart....

 

Up a fair way and up vertically

Russian President Vladimir Putin took to the skies in a motorised hang-glider as he led a flock of young Siberian white cranes in flight.

He donned a baggy white costume with a helmet and goggles and was surrounded by several of the young birds, who were born in captivity and therefore do not know how to fly south for the winter.

Environmentalists use an imitation lead crane - the hang-glider - to show them the way after a series of local training fights like the one led by Mr Putin.

Mr Putin said it had been his idea to fly the aircraft, although it appeared to be steered most of the time by another person in a similar white costume sitting behind him.

A Russian news agency reported that only one crane followed Mr Putin on his first flight, which he attributed to high winds that caused the hang-glider to travel faster than usual.

 

Bit like most politicians then...all wind and Putin....

 

East to the land where most of our gold seems to be going

Tina Leopard, a Chinese blogger and model who earlier this year sparked controversy among Internet users after photos showing her extremely sharp chin and large anime-like eyes went viral on Sina Weibo, China’s version of Twitter.

Apparently, there’s a new fashion trend sweeping across China – the anime look. The country’s most popular social media sites are practically flooded with tons of photos of young people clearly going out of their way to look as much like an anime character as possible. The trend took off last summer, when a girl going  by the name of KOKO uploaded photos and videos showing her thin body, pointy chin and disproportionately large eyes. It turned out she used all kinds of makeup tricks to achieve her anime look, and her photos were apparently also altered in Photoshop, but that didn’t seem to matter much to people who wanted to look like the characters in popular Japanese cartoons

Ye bleedin Gods...

 

And finally:

 

Dahn to the place where there has never been any radiation-ever

 

Recently, a breast-squeezing event was held in Shinjuku, Tokyo. It was part of the “Erotica Will Save the World” event. 

Rules on how to squeeze a Nork:

1) Participants lined up (ID was required to prove they were over 18)

2) Money was donated

3) Participants washed their hands

4) Breast-squeezing commenced. (Two squeezes per hand were allowed.)

“Erotica Will Save the World” took place August 25-26, the name of the event speaks for itself. There were many other events such as “Masturbation Marathon.”

All money raised will help STOP!AIDS, a charity promoting awareness, treatment, and prevention of HIV/AIDS.

 

Why is it that I always miss these things?

 

That’s it: I’m orf to race a cheetah robot.

 

And today’s thought:

Ever been to Las Vegas?

 

Angus  

 

Up your grub: Psychopathic kiddlies: Paper rip orf: and another Plonker.

Loads of solar activity, even more lack of warm stuff and twice as much lack of atmospheric movement at the Castle this last day of summer morn.

No post yesterday, the old sinusitis do-da flared up on Tuesday=the falling dahn and lying in vomit thingy= a trip to my general medic=anti dizzy stuff and some “new” antibiotics lovingly known as Doxycycline which could have some “interesting” side effects such as not being able to the enjoy the Last of the Summer Wine in the garden, blurred/double vision, watery diarrhoea and my favourite rash or itching around the rear exit and dangly bits.

Hence the truncated bit of rambling today-just in case.

 

But there are a few “news items” I would like to bring into the light from my sick bed.

 

According to The World Bank

Global food prices have leapt by 10% in the month of July, raising fears of soaring prices for the planets poorest.

The bank said that a US heat wave and drought in parts of Eastern Europe were partly to blame for the rising costs.

The price of key grains such as corn, wheat and soybean saw the most dramatic increases, described by the World Bank president as "historic".

The bank warned countries importing grains will be particularly vulnerable.

From June to July this year, corn and wheat prices each rose by 25% while soybean prices increased by 17%, the World Bank said. Only rice prices decreased - by 4%.

The G20 group of leading economies has said it will not take any decision on joint action until after the US agriculture department's September estimate of this year's harvest.

 

I’m orf to procure an allotment...

 

And apparently researchers have discovered that

Around one in 100 children in the UK could be a psychopath, they are liable to lie, cheat, manipulate and commit acts of remorseless cruelty.

Appealing to their sense of fair play and conscience is a waste of time because they lack empathy.

So too are standard punishments such as "time out" which involves brief periods of isolation such as sitting in a corner or on a "naughty chair".

Psychologists are only now starting to recognise that psychopathic children, described as callous-unemotional (CU), form a distinct sub-group.

Unlike most children who display anti-social behaviour, they are not primarily products of bad parenting, according to Professor Essi Viding from University College London.

Prof Viding, who will give a talk at the British Science Festival next week, said between a quarter and half of children with conduct problems may fall into the CU category. That amounts to slightly less than 1% of all children.

 

The other 99% are just a mixture of Hannibal Lecter and Mother Theresa

 

Still in Barmy Blighty

Jil Sander's menswear autumn/winter 2012 'Vasari' bag is possibly the world's most expensive paper bag.

Following on from spring/summer 2011's sell-out acetate shopping bag, Jil Sander is now flogging a glorified brown paper lunch bag for a whopping £185.

The bag, which is made of '100 per cent coated paper' and features stitched seams, was carried by office-ready male models during the designer's autumn/winter 2012 menswear show in January, and has proved such a hit that it's been selling out all over the world.

Independent London boutique LN-CC is the only UK stockist of the bag and has already sold out of their stock quota of the medium-sized version just three weeks after it first went on sale. Similarly, it's no longer available on Jil Sander's official ecommerce site, and the brand was reportedly forced to ask for stock back from outside retailers as they were running low. But, you can still pick up the smaller version; although it will still set you back £175.

There's a more luxurious leather version too, but you'll be left with little change from £500.

 

Or you could use an old Tesco carrier bag like I do, and spend the £185 on a gallon of go juice, a loaf of bread and a frozen chicken....

 

And finally:

 

Right to the Eastern part of what is left of Europe

 

Only Fools and Horses fall guy Rodney Trotter is being used in a political campaign to show up a mayoral election candidate as a right plonker.

Pictures of actor Nicholas Lyndhurst - who plays Del Boy's hapless brother in the TV comedy - have been plastered up all over Novi Sad, Serbia, to humiliate current Mayor Igor Pavlicic.

Local critics have dubbed the Town Hall leader 'Rodney' because they say his ducking and diving makes him just like his namesake on the hit show.

"He looks like him and he acts like him too. The show is very popular over here so everyone knows who we mean," explained one critic. 

 

We have more than a couple of Rodney’s up in the leaning tower of burning Westminster.

 Chateauneuf du Pape!

  

That’s it: I’m orf to invent something

 

And today’s thought:

99% of pets are psycho

 

 

Angus

 

Dead mouse in Downing Street: Fishy Skunk shooting: Valley of balls: Koala crawl: Antibiotic sausages: and a Big racquet.

A bit of solar stuff, not a lot of atmospheric movement and a lack of warm stuff at the Castle this morn, the interweb thingy seems to have returned to its former state and apologies to those who have commented, I will catch up.

And apparently we have another few days of a different big sporty thing in the Smoke.

 

Up in the big empty black house that resides in Downing Street

Allegedly while U-Turn Cam is dahn in pastyland Larry the Downing Street cat has finally recorded a kill.

The No 10 spokesman quipped: "The only dead mouse in Downing Street is the one Larry caught this morning."

 

Sod it! I thought it was the other rodent....

 

Over the hurricane forming salty thing on the left

Authorities say a Central Texas woman aiming for a skunk accidentally shot her husband when the bullet ricocheted.

Brazos County Sheriff Chris Kirk says the husband was expected to be released Monday from a Houston hospital. Kirk says the accident happened Sunday night at the family's house near College Station. The husband was inside.

Kirk says the bullet ricocheted off a deck, went through the house's closed back door and struck the husband in the abdomen. Kirk says the bullet did not damage any vital organs.

The sheriff says the wife, who has a concealed handgun permit, came out of the home's detached garage and saw a skunk. Kirk says the woman fired a .45-caliber handgun at the animal but missed.

 

Yeah right....allegedly...

 

Right a lot to one of the Stan’s

Close to the town of Shetpe in Western Kazakhstan lies the Valley of Balls – or Torysh, as it is known in Kazakh. It consists of numerous ball-like rock formations strewn across a wide range of steppe land. The balls range in size from tiny marble-like rocks to huge boulders the size of a car.

The phenomenon is poorly researched, but there could be a number of geological explanations from megaspherulites - crystalline balls formed in volcanic ash and then revealed by weathering - to cannonball concretions - a process where sediment accumulates around a harder core - to spherical weathering wherein the conditions are just right to erode rocks into spherical form. In this case due to the range of sizes the most likely explanation is that of spherulite formation.

Visible from the Valley is Sherkala (Lion Rock), a stunning 332m white and ochre chalk outcrop with numerous fissures along its rim and even more rock formations at its foot. Close by are also the scant ruins of the Silk Road town Kyzylkala. 

Load of old megaspherulites?

 

Dahn Unda

An Amateur video captured a koala doing the crawl in the Tallebudgera Creek on the Gold Coast.

Koalas sleep for up to 16 hours a day and sightings of them swimming are extremely rare.

They are also known to drown if they fall in when drinking from swimming pools and are unable to climb out. Experts say it is possible the koala felt trapped on the bank of the tidal creek and decided the canoe was its best available escape route.

Local media said the stunned canoeists put the animal on an embankment at a local golf club where koalas were known to populate the gum trees.

 

Quite a lot like me then-except for the drinking from swimming pools and populating gum trees....

 

Back in the USA and other places

 

 

Antibiotic residues in uncured pepperoni or salami meat are potent enough to weaken helpful bacteria that processors add to acidify the sausage to make it safe for consumption, according to a study to be published in mBio, the online open-access journal of the American Society for Microbiology, on August 28.

Sausage manufacturers commonly inoculate sausage meat with lactic-acid-producing bacteria in an effort to control the fermentation process so that the final product is acidic enough to kill pathogens that might have existed in the raw meat. By killing the bacteria that produce lactic acid, antibiotic residues can allow pathogenic bacteria to proliferate.

Researchers at the University of Copenhagen, Denmark, and University College Cork, Ireland, found that antibiotic concentrations within limits set by US and European Union (EU) regulators are high enough to slow fermentation, the process that acidifies the sausages and helps destroy food borne pathogens like Salmonella or E. coli.

 

No more pizzas for me....

 

And finally:

 

Up to the Big Apple

 

New Yorker Ashrita Furman has just built a tennis racquet the size of a bus.

Furman, who holds the record for the most Guinness World Records at one time -- currently 151 -- hopes his mammoth wooden racquet will soon join the list.

The contraption is an exact copy of the wooden one used by Billie Jean King in the 1970s when she reigned over women's tennis at tournaments like the US Open that kicked off in New York this week.

The laminated wooden head, brown grip, red trim and inscriptions are a perfect match.

The only difference is that the racket measures 50 feet (15.2 meters) long and has a head 16 feet (4.9 meters) wide. The strings are made of water hose and the handle is so big that even a large person would have trouble wrapping both arms around it.

"It's 22.2 times bigger and done to scale," Furman told AFP.

 

Pity Tim Henman didn’t have one, he might have bleedin won something...

 

That’s it: I’m orf to get the tape measure out.

 

And today’s thought:

Gimme-Gimme I want the big racquet NOW!

 

 

Angus

ATOS arseholes: Mar-mite make you better: Evans above: Wheel clamp man: Nasty Nanofibres: The Ownphone: and Wireless donkeys.

Vast amounts of solar stuff, not a sniff of atmospheric movement, more than a mass of lack of warm stuff and even less wet stuff at the Castle this morn.

Very late this Tuesday, it seems that the skywater during the dark thing has infiltrated the subterranean BT lines yet again and caused the interweb thingy to go part time.

 

I see that the Paralympics “sponsor” ATOS is going to check its spelling and grammar after it lied to a claimant with depression saying that “assessors were not required to be specifically trained in mental health.

Ms Whitwell has social anxiety disorder and depression, but was declared fit to work following a medical assessment last year. The decision was later overturned by an appeals tribunal.

In June, she was asked to attend another assessment to see whether her condition had changed.

Ms Whitwell said she had a panic attack, in part because she said the assessor did not know anything about depression, and complained to Atos over the incident earlier this month.

In the reply on 13 August, seen by BBC News, an Atos customer relations manager explained there was no requirement for assessors to be specifically trained in mental health.

However, an Atos spokeswoman has now said this comment was "mistaken", insisting that all assessors do have specific mental health training.

But Ms Whitwell said Atos had made a terrible mistake and was now trying desperately to backtrack.

"The person who did my last two medicals was stated as a registered nurse. She clearly didn't have any mental health training," she said.

"The [Department for Work and Pensions] may as well have got a decision from a dentist."

The Department for Work and Pensions and Atos said they were working with disability groups to improve the medical tests, known as the Work Capability Assessment, and had recruited 60 "mental function champions" to give advice to the doctors and nurses carrying out the tests.

 

You pays our money and gets dickheads and no mate’s medics earning a lot on the side...

 

Allegedly the latest medical breakthrough is-marmite

Marmite could be the key to beating killer superbugs, according to new research.

An ingredient in the savoury spread could help doctors defeat potential killers such as MRSA by massively boosting the body’s defences against the deadly bacteria.

Scientists have found that high doses of niacin or vitamin B3, which Marmite is especially rich in, can bolster the body against the deadlier strains of the staphylococcus bacteria.

In tests, the immune system’s ability to defend itself against different strains of deadly bugs increased up to1,000 times. The discovery will help in the battle against growing numbers of antibioticresistant superbugs which pose a major threat in hospitals.

But to provide the benefits seen in the study, much higher B3 concentrations would be needed than can be obtained from a regular dose of the yeast extract spread.

 

Personally I like Marmite-I can’t afford it but I like it....

 

Dahn ‘ere in ‘Ampshire in badly run Sarf Blighty

A weekend car and music festival hosted by DJ Chris Evans has helped raise at least £750,000 for Children in Need.

About 15,000 people attended CarFest at Laverstoke Park Farm in Overton on an estate owned by former F1 World Champion Jody Scheckter.

The Radio 2 breakfast show presenter said the event, and one planned for Cheshire in September, had so far raised about £750,000.

"The best way of raising money is by having fun," he said.

The event combined live music with food and car attractions, with profits going to the BBC's Children in Need appeal.

Bands Texas and Razorlight headlined the event.

A CarFest North event is being held at Cholmondeley Castle in Cheshire on the weekend of 8-9 September.

 

Personally I don’t like copper knob Evans but nice one Chris...

 

Dahn Unda

 

A mystery man with a Zapata moustache uses an angle grinder to remove the wheel clamps and save motorists a $135 (£88) release fee.

In return, he asks for a small donation which he reportedly gives to the homeless.

However, the motorists’ superhero, known as Wheel Clamp Man, has been described as a menace by police.

Wheel Clamp Man has reportedly been helping forlorn motorists for several weeks in Perth, Western Australia. He was tracked down by a weekend newspaper, but refused to disclose his name and said he was inspired by England’s Angle-grinder Man, who wore a blue leotard and removed clamps in London and Kent almost a decade ago. He wore the costume to avoid being filmed on closed circuit cameras and asked drivers before removing the metal restraints.

“I’m helping people out,” he told Perth’s Sunday Times newspaper. “I don’t feel I’m damaging property.

 

Saint or sinner?

 

Norf of the border

 

Tiny fibres made by the nanotechnology industry could be as dangerous as asbestos if they are inhaled, say researchers.

Nanofibres are found in a wide range of everyday items, from sports equipment and waterproofs to nappies and vacuum cleaners.

But some are similar in shape to asbestos fibres, which have been known to cause lung cancers such as mesothelioma.

Research on mice, published in Toxicology Sciences, suggests the longer nanofibres are more dangerous.

Human and mouse lungs are different, but the researchers hope the study will help to design safer nanofibres.

Ken Donaldson, professor of respiratory toxicology at the University of Edinburgh, said: ‘Concern has been expressed that new kinds of nanofibres being made by nanotechnology industries might pose a risk because they have a similar shape to asbestos.’

Silver nanofibres of varying lengths were injected into the lungs of mice.

Those larger than five micrometres, or five-thousandths of a millimetre, tended to become lodged in the lungs and cause inflammation. The smaller ones were cleared from the lungs.

Prof Donaldson said: ‘we knew that long fibres, compared with shorter fibres, could cause tumours, but until now we did not know the cut-off length at which this happened.

 

Sorted?

 

Still in simple Blighty

The OwnFone could be the ideal solution for young children or people who struggle to get to grips with technology.

Described as "the world's first personalised mobile phone" the OwnFone does away with a screen and the majority of buttons, instead replacing them with direct-dial buttons and volume controls.

Aimed primarily at children and the elderly, the £55 device is customised to the owner and features buttons with the names of up to 12 people they are most likely to want to call. Pressing the name places a call to that person; incoming calls are answered with an answer button.

Each OwnFone is only the size of a credit card and weighs 40g. Makers say they could also be used in situations you may not want to take your expensive Smartphone, like to a music festival or to the beach.

Creator Tom Sunderland said: "I wanted to simplify the design of a mobile phone as far as it could go and realised that personalisation was the key to achieving this. If you could make a call simply by pressing a name or photo, you would bypass the complexity of a keypad and connect with people in a simple, natural way.

"Recognising a name or a face is the first thing we learn how to do and one of the last skills to go when we get old. So, a phone with a personalised interface would work for all ages.

Great idea unless you have been smoking whacky baccy for many, many years....

 

And finally:

East far more miles than you could shake a laptop at

An Israeli company is bringing its biblical tour guide service into the 21st century after fitting its fleet of donkeys with wireless routers.

Visitors to the historical park of Kfar Kedem in northern Israel are now able to update their Facebook status or browse the internet thanks to the newly-fitted service.

Situated in the heart of Galilee, the park promises to provide visitors with 'an authentic ancient biblical experience', teaching them how people lived in Old Testament times.

'You take some pictures, you want to change your picture on Facebook - you can do it,' explained the park's manager, Menachem Goldberg .

He added: 'Our village has 30 donkeys, and we’ve equipped the first five with wireless routers that are attached to the donkey’s body.

'In the future we’ll consider equipping all of the donkeys with the necessary apparatus'.

 

Anyone asked the Donkeys?

 

That’s it: I’m not orf to buy an 84 inch ultra definition TV

 

And today’s thought:

Wheel clamp man strikes again

 

 

Angus

Another fine mess: Flying pig dogs: Monkey see-monkey picnic: Unconstitutional tits: and go faster Kia.

Calmish, dryish, warmish and just a hint of solar activity at the Castle this bank holiday morn, I’m orf to Tesco when it opens and his Maj is now bringing me frogs during the light thing and very, very large moths when the dark stuff descends.

 

All across “no war on motorists” Blighty

Councils have lobbied the Government for the right to fine drivers who make illegal turns, encroach on yellow boxes or drive in bus and cycle lanes.

Ministers indicated they were “sympathetic” to the plans amid growing concerns from motoring groups that councils would use them as a “cash cow”. The Coalition had promised to end the “war on motorists” when it came to power.

Local authorities already have the power to fine motorists for parking illegally. However, they now want the same powers as authorities in London to fine motorists for other offences.

It is understood the Department for Transport has been in discussions with 20 councils about giving them the new powers. They include Birmingham, Brighton and Hove, Bristol, Leeds, Liverpool, Manchester, Newcastle, Nottingham, Plymouth, Reading, Salford, Sheffield and Southampton.

In London, local authorities used their extended powers to fine 800,000 motorists last year, raising at least £50 million. The revenue was on top of at least £250 million in parking fines.

Motorists already pay more than £330m in parking fines to town halls, which has spawned a lucrative enforcement industry for wheel clampers.

In 2003, London councils were given the right to fine motorists for traffic offences. The Local Government Association is lobbying for the powers to be extended to the rest of the country.

Peter Box, chairman of the LGA’s Economy and Transport Board, said: “Very little is currently done to stop the minority of inconsiderate drivers who block cycle lanes and bus lanes, pull up in cycle boxes at traffic lights and clog box junctions causing long tailbacks in rush hour.

“Not only do these needless infringements cause frustration to responsible motorists, they can also put cyclists at risk by forcing them into busy traffic

 

Oh dear, oh dear.....

 

Left many, many imperial yards

At the Richmond county fair on Staten Island pigs have been replaced by flying dogs in order to minimise the risk of swine flu.

The ‘Labor’ Day weekend festivities this year will scrap pig races -- a decades-old tradition at the fair -- in favour of an act showcasing talented local pooches running down an elevated plank and diving into the water.

"It's like the doggy Olympics. These are amateurs. They will dash down a raised dock, leap into the air, and they are judged on a variety of different ways: They can catch things, on distance, height," said Ed Wiseman, executive director of Historic Richmond Town.

The canine spectacle will be hosted by Ultimate Air Dogs -- a national travelling show owned and emceed by former Detroit Tigers pitcher Milt Wilcox.

 

Barking mad-or pigging crazy?

 

Still in home of the abandoned and the land of food

 

In a quiet area of Griffith Park in Los Angeles, you can picnic in a bear grotto and climb inside abandoned monkey cages. If you have ever wondered what you appear like to the animals in the zoo, this abandoned LA zoo is your chance to find out.

The site of the first Los Angeles zoo, the zoo opened in 1912 with 15 animals. Many of the enclosures were built in the 1930’s by Works Progress Administration crews and were made in the iron bars/pacing animal style that was standard for zoos of that era. The zoo was abandoned in 1966 when the current zoo opened.

Today the cave enclosures have now been outfitted with picnic benches and grills. A trail leading up from the caves gives you a zookeeper’s view of the lion’s den and leads to ever more abandoned cages, and giving one an eerie feeling of what it is like to be on the other side of the bars.

 Very appetising...

 

Back up to the big bit of round fruit

 

Some two dozen topless women protested in a New York City park on a hot, sweaty Sunday as part of what they called "National Go-Topless Day" to draw attention to inequality in topless rights between men and women.

The topless women drew crowds of onlookers who took pictures and video with their cell phones.

"We say there is nothing wrong with the female nipple," Karen Heaven, an organizer of the event, told the crowd that quickly formed around her in Manhattan's Bryant Park. She was wearing white pants and not much else besides a purse over her shoulder. "My dog has six, I have two, but I can be put in jail for showing my nipples. It's 2012 -- what are we thinking?"

 

No argument from me....

 

And finally: 

Across to the place James T Kirk came from

An Iowa woman whose accelerator got stuck as she drove up Interstate 35 in Missouri managed to control the vehicle even as speeds topped 110 mph and she was forced to the median several times to avoid other drivers, the Missouri State Highway Patrol said.

Patrol spokesman Sheldon Lyon praised Lauri Ulvestad, 47, of Ames, Iowa, for not crashing her 2011 Kia Sorento as she weaved through traffic and a construction zone with no way to slow down.

"Not only to drive fast, but to go into the median, pull back up into the passing lane and hit that asphalt lip -- and not overcorrect -- it was really amazing to see her do that repeatedly," Lyon said.

Ulvestad was driving north on the interstate near Bethany, Mo., on Sunday when she realized her accelerator was stuck. Panicked, she called 911 and soon two state troopers caught up with her. One pulled in front of her to alert traffic ahead, while the other stayed behind her.

Lyon said the three cars covered 59 miles in 35 minutes before the woman's vehicle suddenly slowed and came to a stop on the inside shoulder near Osceola, Iowa, about 40 miles north of the state line.

Ulvestad told KCCI-TV in Des Moines, Iowa, that as she passed Osceola she was told to lift up the accelerator and push on the brake.

"And so I did that, and it slammed me from 119 mph to like nothing," she said.

Irvine, Calif.-based Kia Motors America Inc. issued a statement Friday afternoon saying it has inspected Ulvestad's vehicle but hasn't been able to identify the problem that caused her accelerator to stick.

"Our technicians have been unable to duplicate the issue and this appears to be an isolated incident. KMA will continue to investigate and analyze the facts of this situation and will work with the customer to resolve the matter in a timely manner," the company said.

Kia said it has provided Ulvestad with alternative transportation and is working with her to resolve the issue in a timely manner.

Click on this link to watch the video

 

Note to self-do not buy a Kia Sorento...

 

That’s it: I’m orf for a planet sized snack.

 

And today’s thought:

Slap a ticket on that...

 

 

Angus

Who gives a rat’s arse?

The endless wittering on about the ginger haired squaddy and the so called “whistleblower” continue to dominate what is laughingly called the ‘media’.

And to be honest I really don’t give a shit about either of them, Prince Henry got his kit orf in a private hotel room with at least two other people because one of them took the photos, copper knob knew he was being snapped and still carried on, which concerns me because the royal twat is in charge of subordinates and a very large lump of extremely dangerous machinery in his day job.

Let’s face it any bloke of 27 who has the money and lifestyle of the spare heir would probably do the same thing-given the chance.

The fact that he showed his dangly bits to someone with a camera phone isn’t the problem, but the fact that his judgement is not quite what we should expect from an army officer should be of concern.

 

 

And the other “man” Julian Aspergers or whatever his moniker is who is hiding in some foreign embassy because he doesn’t want to face charges of sexual assault in one of the Nordic countries on the premise that he will be extradited to America to face charges over ‘wikileaks’ is something that I can happily ignore for several years or maybe more. 

These arseholes are nothing to do with the freedom of the press, who are after all just businesses trying to make as much money as possible from sales of newspapers, let the press do what they will with these “stories”, we have the ultimate sanction-don’t buy the bloody things. 

Harry did what he did and got caught for which he will face some sort of bollicking from his superior officer and dear old Charlie, Aspergers committed a “crime” in Sweden and should crawl out of someone else’s hole, grow up and face the music.

It used to be called “taking responsibility”, now it seems to be “make enough fuss and you will get away with it”.

 

What has happened to dear old Blighty?

Are we to spend the rest of our lives being bombarded with pointless ‘celeb’ crap by the papers, the box and the interweb thingy or is it time to make a stand and consign all this trash to the recycle bin where it belongs.

Angus