What a “fine” EU: Show me your Russian tats: Big, empty Nazi hotel: Stay away from Limpopo: Tractor beam: and Radio presenter has a swim while texting.

Bleedin cold, bothersome amounts of white fluffy/scrapey, scrapey stuff, not even a flatulent amount of atmospheric movement and less solar stuff than you could shake a bikini line at, at the Castle this morn, his Maj is keeping well away from the windows and the butler is feeding fat, carbon neutral teenagers into the furnace faster than the GDP is falling.

 

After all the non promises from U-Turn Cam about the European community thingy

 

The EU has struck back, apparently the European Commission announced legal action against the UK Government for failing to honour an EU leaders' agreement in February 2011 to "complete" the internal energy market by transposing EU electricity and gas directives into UK law by March 3 2011.

Despite two warnings Britain has still failed to comply with two measures designed to open up energy competition for the benefit of the European energy sector and its consumers.

The Commission said it was now asking the European Court of Justice in Luxembourg to impose daily fines of 148.177 euro (£125,000) for each of the two directives which have only been partially transposed into domestic law.

 

That’ll help us decide....

 

East to the land that used to be Soviet, Socialist and a Republic

Allegedly the Russian Defence Ministry is attempting to clampdown on homosexuality with a new handbook that recommends recruits and contractors be checked for genital tattoos, like the image of a “face” on the recruit’s penis.

The Russian newspaper Izvestia on Thursday published details about how recruits would be given a thorough examination and face questioning about their sexual history.

Signs of “promiscuity” could indicate mental instability, addictive personality and suicidal tendencies, according to the documents.

“The reasons for tattooing may indicate a low cultural and educational level,” according a machine translation of the handbook provided by Google. “If set to the impact of external incentives, such as persuasion, direct coercion, it will be evidence of compliance of young men, his tendency to obey the will of another.”

The “knowledge of symbols tattoos help the officer the best way to organize work with a specific person. Particular attention should be paid to the tattoos on the face, on the genitals, buttocks. They can testify not only about certain personal settings, and possible sexual deviation.”

After the examination, authorities hope to determine if the recruit has a “tendency to perversion,” meaning homosexuality.

 

Does Eton allow tattoos?

 

Left a bit to the land that used to be ruler of most of Europe

Stretching for over three miles along the white sandy beach on Germany's Baltic Sea island of Ruegen lies the world’s biggest hotel with 10,000 bedrooms all facing the sea. But for 70 years since it was built, no holiday maker has ever stayed there. This is hotel Prora, a massive building complex built between 1936 and 1939 by the Nazis as part of their "Strength through Joy" ("Kraft durch Freude," KdF) programme. The aim was to provide leisure activities for German workers and spread Nazi propaganda. Locals call Prora the Colossus because of its monumental structure.

Prora lies on an extensive bay between the Sassnitz and Binz regions, known as the Prorer Wiek, on the narrow heath (the Prora) which separates the lagoon of the Großer Jasmunder Bodden from the Baltic Sea. The complex consists of eight identical buildings that extend over a length of 4.5 kilometres and are roughly 150 metres from the beach. A workforce of 9,000 took three years to build it, starting in 1936, and the Nazis had long-term plans for four identical resorts, all with cinema, festival halls, swimming pools and a jetty where Strength Through Joy cruise ships would dock.

 

Not a lot of happiness there, maybe Ex Nazi El Papa could buy it as a summer retreat.

 

Dahn a lot and right a whimsy

Fifteen thousand crocodiles are on the loose after escaping from a farm hit by flooding.

Residents have been warned to stay indoors as wildlife experts try to capture the man-eating beasts.

One was spotted on a school rugby pitch and others have been found trapped in branches of trees after the flood waters fell.

The alarm was raised when all 15,000 Nile crocs at the Rakwena farm in South Africa’s Limpopo province fled their pens which had been opened on Sunday to stop flood water crushing them.

They have since been spotted all over.

Farm boss Zane Langman said he has recaptured “a few thousand” of the reptiles in the dense bush around the property.

But he added: “More than half are still missing.”

Nile crocs can grow up to 16ft and reach speeds of 8mph when running and 22mph swimming.

Commercial crocodile farms breed the animals for their skin, which is used to make belts, shoes and bags.

There is also a small market for the meat but most often it is fed to other crocs, as they are cannibalistic.

Langman, who said it is easier to recapture the beasts at night as their eyes shine red in the dark, also told how he went to rescue friends in a flood-hit house.

“You wonder the whole time if you’ll make it there. When we reached the people, the crocodiles were swimming around them. Praise the Lord, the family was all alive.”

 

Fuck that......

 

Up Norf and right a fairway

A team of scientists has created a real-life miniature "tractor beam" - as featured in the Star Trek series - in a development which may lead to more efficient medical testing.

The microscopic beam - created by scientists from Scotland and the Czech Republic - allows a source of light to attract objects.

Light manipulation techniques have existed since the 1970s, but researchers say the experiment is the first instance of a beam being used to draw objects towards light.

Researchers from the University of St Andrews and the Institute of Scientific Instruments (ISI) in the Czech Republic say development of the beam may be an aid to medical testing, such as in the examination of blood samples.

Normally, when matter and light interact, a solid object is pushed by the light and carried away in a stream of photons.

However, in recent years, researchers have realised that there is a space of parameters when this force reverses.

The scientists have now demonstrated the first experimental realisation of the concept.

Professor Pavel Zemanek of the ISI said: "The whole team have spent a number of years investigating various configurations of particles delivery by light.

"I am proud our results were recognised in this very competitive environment and I am looking forward to new experiments and applications. It is a very exciting time."

Dr Oto Brzobohaty, also of the ISI, said: "These methods are opening new opportunities for fundamental phonics as well as applications for life-sciences."

  

Spiffing, I have my own tractor beam; snag is all I can attract is tractors....

 

And finally:

 

Norf a bit to Brummy land

 

Capital FM newsreader Laura Safe is the one making headlines rather than breaking them after she strolls straight into a canal in Birmingham while engrossed in a text to her boyfriend.

CCTV cameras in the Mailbox shopping district of Birmingham recorded the moment a radio newsreader walked straight into a freezing cold canal while composing a text to her boyfriend.

Laura Safe, who works for Capital FM's breakfast show in the city, can be seen texting as she walks down a flight of steps, unaware of the canal side a few feet in front of her. Seconds later a splash reveals she has fallen in, and she briefly flails around in the freezing cold water.

Ms Safe was pulled to safety moments later by a passer-by, with her health if not her pride fully intact.

 

News reading Numpty

 

That’s it: I’m orf to have a row about Quantum theory

 

And today’s thought:

It's the tractor beam bones; she's checking out my tattoos

 

 

Angus

S'now recession: Irish leccy: “Hurry Up and Die”: la saleté françaises: Jet surfing: and some “funny” dummies.

More lack of warm than you could shake a set of long johns at, masses of white fluffy/scrapey scrapey stuff, minimum amounts of atmospheric movement and fuck all solar stuff as usual at the Castle this morn, just returned from the stale bread (£1.45) gruel (94ps per tin) and his Maj’s food run dahn Tesco, bought yet another “charity” fake pound coin for the pay me or stagger around with a basket trolley thingy (so far I have lost two) and his Maj is back to his old loony self.

 

Son of a B......aronet

And alien reptile in disguise George (I don’t have to worry about my gas bill) Osborne is lining up his excuses for his piss poor “management” of broke Blighty’s economy.

Apparently disruption caused by heavy snowfall across Britain could see the UK slip back into recession once again, in what would be an unprecedented setback for the economy.

Back in 2010 Osborne blamed the snow for the UK economy's poor performance in the final quarter of 2010 and he will probably do it again this year.

According to Global Insight's chief UK and European economist Howard Archer "Given the UK's ability to grind to a halt with even a flake, the snow has come at a very brittle time for the UK economy, adding to the headwinds that it is already battling against as it tries to avoid a triple-dip recession,"

2012 saw the double-dip recession begun in October 2011 continue for the first half of the year, before the three months to the end of September 2012 registered growth of 0.9% boosted by the Olympic Games.

 

Oh good, it was worth the twenty billion for the jumpy, runny, throwy, swimmy thing then......

 

Across the sea to Ireland

Allegedly UK and Irish ministers will today sign an agreement that could see some of the world's largest wind turbines built across the Irish midlands.

Stretching more than 600 feet (180 metres) in the air, the towers are set to generate energy for millions of UK homes from 2017.

The UK government says the Irish power is a cheaper form of renewable than offshore wind.

Under the plan, a number of companies are seeking to erect hundreds of wind turbines across the boggy midlands of Ireland. The power generated would be transferred to the UK via undersea cables that would join the grid at two points in Wales.

One of the developers, Element Power, says the plan would save UK consumers around £7bn over 15 years compared to other renewable sources.

The developers also say that thousands of jobs will be created in Ireland and the economy as a whole will benefit.

But concerns are now growing that the turbines needed to provide the power will be of a size and scale not seen in Britain or Ireland before.

"They will be spread around 40 clusters in five counties," said Element Power's Peter Harte.

Because the bog lands are relatively windless, the company behind the scheme says they will need to stretch high into the sky to catch sufficient wind to generate power.

 

That’s Irish.....

 

East to the land of non glowing things

The Japanese finance minister Taro Aso, who also serves as the deputy prime monster, had been in office little more than a month when he insulted Japan’s elderly on Monday, calling those who can no longer feed themselves "tube people,” and claiming that treatment for just one patient close to death can cost the government “tens of millions of yen” a month.

He reckons that he would refuse any treatment meant to prolong his life and “I would wake up feeling increasingly bad knowing that [treatment] was all being paid for by the government,” he said during a meeting of the national council on social security reforms. “The problem won’t be solved unless you let them hurry up and die.”



He obviously hasn’t learnt much since we kicked their arses back in 1945.

Still in the land of eternal recession

A new full course menu of dirt-inspired items at Tokyo French restaurant Ne Quittez Pas will set you back 10,000 yen or $112.

According to Japanese news site Rocketnews24, the chef at the restaurant once won a high profile cooking contest with his dirt sauce, so a full menu of soil-infused courses was apparently the next logical step. The dirt is a special black soil from Kanuma, Tochigi Prefecture and has been tested for safety and purity (yeah right).

The first course is a potato starch and dirt soup served in a shot glass rimmed with salt, and is reportedly way better than it sounds. Apparently it doesn’t have “a dirty flavour at all.”

The second course of salad with dirt dressing “tasted so little of the earthiness I was expecting that I’d kind of forgotten about that ingredient,” writes the reviewer.

And for the main course, “aspic made with oriental clams and the top layer of sediment, and a dirt risotto with sautéed sea bass and burdock root.”

Dessert is dirt ice cream and dirt gratin followed by dirt mint tea that reportedly looks like puddle water.

 

Oh num fucking num, still they could feed it to the non dying old farts I suppose.

 

Back in barmy Blighty

The inventors of a jet-propelled surfboard so they are struggling to keep up with demand.

The Jetsurf is a cross between a surf board and a jet-ski and can reach speeds of 40mph.

The flat carbon fibre board has a 100cc engine attached to the back and features a 2.5 litre fuel tank.

Users stand upright on the board and use their body weight to steer it from side to side like a surfer would.

The craft sucks in water from the front and shoots it out behind, helping it to build up speed very quickly.

Meanwhile, an electronic leash which is attached to the surfer's wrist acts as both a throttle and an emergency kill-cord.

It was developed by jet-surf.com and the company says it is struggling to keep up with demand for the £7,000 product.

Technician Ben Gibson said: "It handles like a surf board and the weight of it isn't much more than a kite board or a surf board.

"Out of all the sports out there it is actually closest to snowboarding, as you are not getting pulled around or waiting for waves like on a surf board.

"We make 20 boards a month, all handmade, and constantly have a waiting list for them."

 

Sort of defeats the object doesn’t it....

 

And finally: 

From all over somewhere:

Here are a few pics of “funny” dummies:

 

  

That’s it: I’m orf to print out an extension for the Castle

 

And today’s thought:

Blighty.

 

 

Angus

The Grain train: Academic Twats: Toilet hostages: Three arses and an ass: Naked in the snow: Burning Brunost: and la puanteur françaises.

Lots of lack of warm, much less atmospheric movement, loads of frozen skywater and limitless amounts of lack of solar stuff at the Castle this morn, didn’t post yestermorn because of a “medical emergency”: his Maj decided to test out Newton’s law of plummeting fruit and fell out of the master bedroom window, he landed OK but smashed his face on a stone pot on the way dahn-blood, snot and drool in bucket loads.

Worried that he might have broken his jaw I got him dahn the Vets for a check up, and apart from a bloody nose and a “painkiller jab” he survived, and after giving the nice man £36 we went home and spent the day sleeping on the four-poster. 

This morn he is eating, doing his business and chasing invisible things around the garden, and apart from a slight limp from the jab is just about back to his “normal” self.

 

And Lovely Blogger has finally sorted out the IE picture upload thingy.

 

Just watched shit for brains “Dave” on Auntie

As he rambled on about Gord knows what with a bit about the EU and the next election, problem is I phased out after about three minutes and went to make a cup of coffee.

Anyone know what he actually said-or meant?

 

Apparently the reason that stale bread costs £1.45 a loaf dahn Tesco

Is that five multinational company’s control 90 per cent of the world’s grain trade, charities called for fresh action to crack down on tax avoidance by global corporations, claiming that the lives of 230 young children could be saved every day if firms paid their proper dues in the nations where they operated.

The new campaign challenges U-Turn Cam to take the lead in championing measures to stop tax-dodging by companies, prevent farmers from being forced off their land and ensure western nations live up to their promises on aid.

More than 100 charities and faith groups led by Oxfam have formed the largest coalition of its kind since the Make Poverty History campaign eight years ago. They are being backed by the billionaire philanthropist Bill Gates and civil rights activist Archbishop Desmond Tutu.

Allegedly five multinationals – ADM, Bunge, Cargill, Glencore and Louis Dreyfus – control all but ten per cent of the world’s grain supplies.

 

Bastards.....

 

All over leafy lane Blighty

Leading ‘academics’ have told Patrick McLoughlin, the Transport Secretary that pay as you drive road charging should be introduced to tackle congestion and cut carbon emissions.

In an open letter they warned that ploughing more money into Britain’s road network will only generate more traffic.

Signed by 32 leading transport academics including Prof. David Banister of Oxford University and Prof. Peter Mackie of Leeds, the letter called for a radical rethink of strategy by Whitehall.

 

Here we go again, a load of tossers that exist in their ivory towers in a city that hates motors think they know how to save the world by pricing motorist’s orf the road.

There are many solutions, one of which is to charge “normal” road tax for the first car registered at an address, charge double for the second car, triple for the third and so on, this would make people think twice about stocking up on transport and may even reduce the piss poor parking problems we all suffer from both at home and out and about.

 

East to the land of most things

 

Hundreds of Chinese factory workers angry about strictly timed bathroom breaks and fines for starting work late held their Japanese and Chinese manager’s hostage for a day and a half before police broke up the strike.

About 1,000 workers at Shanghai Shinmei Electric Company held the 10 Japanese nationals and eight Chinese managers inside the factory in Shanghai starting Friday morning until 11.50 p.m. Saturday, said a statement from the parent company, Shinmei Electric Co., released Monday.

It said the managers were released uninjured after 300 police officers were called to the factory.

A security guard at the Shanghai plant said Tuesday that workers had gone on strike to protest the company's issuing of new work rules, including time limits on bathroom breaks and fines for being late.

"The workers demanded the scrapping of the ridiculously strict requirements stipulating that workers only have two minutes to go to the toilet and workers will be fined 50 Yuan ($8) if they are late once and fired if they are late twice," said the security guard, surnamed Feng.

 

Good for them, especially the more mature workers as it can sometimes take more than two minutes just to “get going” when one is an old fart...

 

West to the land of white powdery stuff

Three thieves who tried to burgle a shop had to abandon the raid - when their getaway donkey made too much noise.

The trio had to ditch their ill-gotten gains in the early hours break-in in Colombia after the donkey started braying and alerted police.

The group had stolen rum, oil, rice, cans of tuna and sardines from a shop in the tiny town of Juan de Acosta, reports Noticias Caracol.

They planned to load the goods onto ten-year-old donkey Xavi, which they had stolen earlier, and make their escape.

But it let out a series of 'hee-haws' and the trio decided to ditch the animal, which was still carrying the stolen items, and make good their escape.

Shop owner Fabio Orozco said: "They came through the roof to rob. They took rum, rice, everything."

The donkey was detained in the town police station for 12 hours until owner Orlando Olivares was notified and came to collect him.

 

Better than a burglar alarm, and it mows the lawn as well....

 

All over white fluffy stuff Blighty

A new craze has emerged-getting naked in the snow, it all started when care worker Leanne Myers, 40, stripped to her undies to pose for a picture playing guitar in the snow with 25-year-old neighbour Danielle Smith.

In a bid to cheer up workmates Leanne posted the picture on a Facebook page she set up called “Wiltshire, let’s get naked in the snow!”

She also invited friends to strip off for their own goose-bump photos in the snow - and 250 people have taken up the challenge in just three days.

Leanne, from Durrington, Wilts, said yesterday: “It is totally amazing, I really had no idea it would take off like this.

“People have really embraced it, and a lot of the pictures are of friends of friends, but now there’s some coming in from people I don’t know.

“I’ve had interest from Abu Dhabi and America and people messaging me saying ‘we’re not in Wiltshire, can we send in a pic?’

“They are welcome from anywhere, as long as they are kept tasteful.”

 

Bugger, knew there would be a snag...

 

Right a bit to one of the upper countries

A truckload of burning cheese has closed a road tunnel in Arctic Norway for the last six days.

Some 27 metric tons of flaming brown cheese (Brunost), a Norwegian delicacy, blocked off a three-km (1.9 mile) tunnel near the northern coastal town of Narvik when it caught fire last Thursday. The fire was finally put out on Monday.

"This high concentration of fat and sugar is almost like petrol if it gets hot enough," said Viggo Berg, a policeman.

Brown cheese is made from whey, contains up to 30 percent fat and has a caramel taste.

"I didn't know that brown cheese burns so well," said Kjell Bjoern Vinje at the Norwegian Public Roads Administration.

He added that in his 15 years in the administration, this was the first time cheese had caught fire on Norwegian roads.

 

That looks something like my toilet deposit this morn, mind you if a bakers van crashed into it they could have Norwegian rarebit....

 

And finally:

 

From across the British Sea

A stinking cloud of gas has been hanging over large areas of England after a leak at a French chemical plant, sparking thousands of calls to emergency services.

The sulphurous stench - likened to rotten eggs - is said by officials to be completely harmless.

But police in Kent, Sussex and Surrey began to receive floods of calls from concerned residents on Tuesday morning - and by afternoon there were reports of the unwelcome whiff in Oxfordshire and as far north as Northampton.

The gas, called mercaptan, was accidentally leaked from a factory in the northern city of Rouen and before long had drifted over the English Channel.

It is sometimes added to natural gas to alert people to gas leaks

The National Grid, which would normally deal with up to 10,000 calls countrywide in a day, had received an "unprecedented" 100,000 calls by 2pm.

The stench was reported as far north as Northamptonshire

Sussex Police said: "The smell is from an additive to the gas which has an unpleasant aroma but is not toxic and there is no danger to the public."

The Health Protection Agency (HPA) said the gas had diluted since entering the air over England, and, although it may cause some people to feel slightly sick, it will dispel naturally.

 

I blame the French obsession with garlic...

 

That’s it: I’m orf to get some privacy visors

 

And today’s thought:

Orf the menu

 

Angus

Get your finger out CHunt: Look to Home: Thighs the limit: Precision walking: Belgian old fart GPS Numpty: and the DeLorean hovercraft:

Not a lot of lack of cold, even less atmospheric movement, just as much white fluffy stuff and less solar stuff than you could fit in U-Turn Cam’s “brain”, just returned from the stale bread (£1.45) gruel (94p a tin) and his Maj’s food run dahn Equine Tesco, managed to avoid all the knob heads that have to drive at ten fucking miles an hour on perfectly clear and safe roads who stop at every roundabout whether it is clear or not.

If “they” are that scared of a bit of wet and cold then they should get out of their motors and walk so that the rest of us can proceed at a decent pace to where we are going.

Still using HMTL to insert photos....

 

And talking of useless CHunts 

 

The ‘Elf Secretary reckons that a forthcoming report on standards in the NHS would provoke “a huge debate” about poor standards of care and the absence of “compassion” on hospital wards.

While the scandal at the Mid Staffordshire NHS trust represented the worst of the problem, “everyone can sense that there are little bits of Stafford dotted around the system”, Mr CHunt said.

His comments come 10 days before he is due to receive the final report from the public inquiry, conducted by Robert Francis QC, into standards of care following the Mid Staffs scandal.

Stafford hospital was exposed in 2009 after regulators found that between 600 and 1,200 patients died unnecessarily after suffering appalling standards of care.

Patients were found in their own excrement, thirsty and without pain relief, while in A&E it was left to receptionists to assess which cases were urgent and who should wait.

Official figures showed that there were 70 cases of surgery being conducted on the wrong parts of patient’s bodies in 2011-12, and 161 foreign objects being left inside patients after operations. In total, 326 “never events” occurred during the last year, almost one a day.

Jezza CHunt said he had been dismayed by the number of so-called “never events”, such as the wrong limb being amputated, or the wrong implant being fitted, that take place in the NHS.

 

Not as fucking “dismayed” as the poor bastards on the receiving end Jezza...

 

And shit for brains U-Turn Cam is concentrating on Norf Africa 

Where half a dozen Brits sadly got killed by “terrorists”, and reckons that the world must respond with "iron resolve" to the terrorist threat, fair enough and condolences to the families but we do have more pressing problems in Blighty-the item above for a start which is happening every day not once in a BP moon, but at least Silly Billy has got his 15 minutes of fame.

Time this “government” got its priorities right.

 

The latest “thing” to emerge from the land where radiation is a thing of the past 

 

Has come from a Japanese “marketing” firm that is recruiting girls to promote companies by wearing sticker adverts…on their thighs, the gap between the hem of a short skirt and the top of a long sock is apparently called ‘zettai ryouiki’ in Japanese, which roughly translates as ‘absolute territory’.

 

Absolute crap....

 

Still in the land of “slanty eyed yellow bastards” (quote from Prince Phil the Greek)

 

Another fad is “Precision Walking” where a load of tosspots walk about in formation while being shouted at by an even bigger tosspot.

 

Otherwise known in Blighty as military drills.... 

Back in what is left of Europe

 

A Belgian woman drove for nearly 1500 kilometres through six countries before realising her car navigation system had "gone wrong". Then she had to drive all the way back.

Sabine Moreau, 67, left her home at Solre-sur-Sambre to pick up a friend from the train station at Brussels.

The journey was meant to last just 61km, but she took a wrong turn and ended up 1500km away in Zagreb, Croatia, the UK's Daily Mail reported.

It's believed she drove through France, Germany, Austria and Slovenia on the way.

She passed traffic signs in different languages and stopped to refuel her car several times and get some sleep, but didn't stop to question the Tom-tom sat-nav until 60 hours later when she realised she may not be in Belgium anymore.

A police spokesman from Belgium said it was "an incredible story" and said the woman did nothing wrong.

 

Well; she is Belgian.....what a cupid old stunt....

 

And finally: 

From the home of the car and the land of the odd

Comes the DeLorean hovercraft...

 

Handles about as well as it did on the road...

 

That’s it: I’m orf to check out my helix

 

And today’s thought:

Hyundai non-hovercraft

 

 

Angus

 

 

Ugly sisters go German: Dutch ‘Orses: Bucket burglar: Super Sniper Scope: The Desk Egg: and a really big Telly.

 

Onerous amounts of white fluffy stuff, only a whimsy of atmospheric movement, oodles of lack of warm and as usual sod all solar stuff at the Castle this morn, everything has come to a halt dahn ‘ere in ‘Ampshire, no busses, not a lot of trains, closed schools, closed work places, not a glimpse of postman Pat and even the rich bastards that jet their way out of Farnborough airport in their private planes are grounded. 

And it wasn’t as if the Met Office gave us a couple of days notice was it.... 

Still having to use HMTL to post pictures, still it’s only been two fucking weeks since the “problem” started-fucking Blogger.

 

And I see that as the Afghanistan do-dah winds dahn the shit for brains Government are looking at Algeria for their next reason to kill orf some more of our brave soldiers/soldieresses.

 

Apparently the Piss Poor Policies Millionaires Club Coalition 

Have appointed Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie to represent the UK in Germany, In a speech at the British embassy in Berlin, Princess Beatrice said that the promotional campaign was not only designed to attract tourists to the UK, but also to appeal to the business community.

"Britain has trend setting fashion, ground-breaking scientists and innovative technology companies," she said. "It is also a welcome home for investors. We're here to encourage more German businesses to join the thousands that are developing successful partnerships in Britain."

Beatrice and her sister then posed alongside an iconic Great Britain-branded Mini next to the Brandenburg gate, before setting off on their own "mini adventure" through the streets of Berlin.

 

Is this really the best we can do for dear old Blighty, and by the way ugly sisters the “iconic Great Britain-branded Mini” is a German BMW...

 

Allegedly Dutch suppliers have been identified as the suspected source of horse meat which contaminated beef burgers sold in British supermarkets. 

 

Food standards officials in Ireland have asked their Dutch counterparts to investigate “several companies” in connection with the scandal.

Officials believe the horse meat in beef burgers sold by British supermarkets came from contaminated “filler” imported from Holland.

Food safety experts claimed that suppliers in Europe might have passed off horse filler as beef because it costs four times less.

However, under Dutch regulations, if a company is found to have deliberately passed off horse meat as beef, the maximum fine is just €1,050 (£880).

Industry insiders said horse meat from Holland was likely to have been imported from Argentina or Brazil.

 

I’d go for Argentina-they don’t like us much do they.....

 

Over the salty snowy thing on the left 

Looking for some quick cash, Richard Boudreaux went on a burglary spree near his home in Slidell, Louisiana.

There was a flaw in the 23-year-old’s plan however, after he left the house without a mask to cover his face before breaking into the premises of a seafood restaurant where he used to work.

After remembering there was CCTV cameras in place, Mr Boudreaux did his best to conceal his identity, donning a five-gallon bucket over his head.

Boudreaux dressed in all camouflage, wore gloves to prevent leaving fingerprints, and packed burglary tools,’ said a Slidell police department spokesman.

‘Everything was going as planned until Boudreaux realised he forgot his mask to cover his identity.

‘Remembering that his former place of employment had surveillance cameras, Boudreaux improvised and found a bucket to put over his head as he scoured the business, looking for money.

He was later arrested at his home on charges of burglary and possession of marijuana.

 

And a big bucket....

 

Still in the home of weapons and land of the right to bear arms 

DARPA's new One Shot XG scope system will be able to accurately fire an M24 up to a mile. The rail mounted system incorporates a laser rangefinder that measures the speed of downfield crosswinds, distance to the target, atmospheric conditions, and other variables. It then calculates any necessary corrections and displays ballistic aim point offsets in the rifle's scope. Shooters simply need to line up their sights with what the system is displaying and boom: head shot.

While field testing likely won't begin until the end of 2013, preliminary tests have illustrated the system's promise. Shooters employing the One Shot improved their first hit probability by 400 percent and reduced the number of shots they had to take to get that first hit by 230 percent—all while spending 35-percent less time lining up the shots. In other words, this single innovation has the potential to make our snipers four times as deadly, 2.3 times more efficient, and a third quicker.

The entire system weighs 1.4 kg and operates equally well day or night, and it can even be used by a solo sniper. That's not to say that spotters are no longer needed—far from it, spotters perform a host of other vital duties while the sniper's staring down his sights—but the inclusion of a One Shot will make these teams even more efficient and reduce the need to deploy regular infantry.

 

Oh good.....

 

And from the NeatoShop comes 

The Desk Egg, an "eggscellent" paperclip organizer! Make a charming nest of paperclip with the magnetic egg. Your desk will be the talk of the office!

Egg-shaped paperclip organizer

Magnetic egg attracts metal paperclips like a little bird's nest

Includes 50 paper clips

Size: 2" dia. x 2-1/2" (5.1 cm dia. x 6.4 cm)

Design: Cheng-Tsung Feng

 And all for the bargain of $14.95 (plus snow bound postage).

 What do you when it hatches though......?

 

And finally:

 

From the land near where the ugly sisters are 

Porsche have diversified and now produce The C SEED 201 with a16ft-wide screen and costing £414,000 - four times as much as a Porsche 911 sports car.

It's made in Austria by made by the supercar company's Porsche Design Studio which hopes to sell 25 sets a year.

When switched off it is hidden away, but at the touch of a button seven folding panels rise from the ground and unveil the 201in widescreen.

It is made up of more than 725,000 LEDs which display 4.4 trillion colours and use biometric fingerprint sensors to prevent unauthorised use.

Alexander Swatek, from C SEED owner Global Bright Group, came up with the idea for the giant TV after being inspired by the phenomenon of public screenings.

"C SEED is a new brand that came about by pooling years of professional experience. It has a unique heritage because it draws on the best minds in their fields," he said.

 

The snag is that you can only watch it outside-unless you have a Castle....

 

That’s it: I’m orf to try out the “anti magnet” (if I can find it)

 

And today’s thought:

 

 

 

Angus