Warmish, wettish and wobblyish at the Castle this two sleeps to go morn, the Crimbo shopping is all sorted-one Crimbo meal in a box, a parsnip, six mince pies, custard, a bit of Crimbo cake and a partridge in a pear tree.
I have treated myself to a new “smart phone” which runs on android 2.2; I will let you know how good it is when I have worked out how to turn it on.
I staggered into the garden yesterday and believe it or not there are snowdrops in flower!
And the interweb thingy is still dropping in and out-I still blame the Government.
According to (I will never take a Lordship) John (I really needed a new fake beam on my house) Prescott if U-Turn Cam pops his clogs Silly Billy Hague is the most likely candidate to fill his boots.
Son of a B.....aronet (and alien reptile in disguise) George (we are all in this together) Osborne’s family business is having a bit of a slump.
Osborne & Little, the luxury wallpaper and furnishings firm run by Sir Peter Osborne, the Chancellor's father, has posted a loss and predicted tough trading conditions ahead.
The £32.8m turnover company, which has glamorous showrooms on the Kings Road in London and in Paris, Munich and Milan, paid one director £736,000 in salary and pension contributions.
But no dividend was distributed to its shareholders, led by Sir Peter Osborne, who founded the firm with his brother-in-law Antony Little in 1968. George Osborne retains a 15pc stake via a trust.
Sir Peter, the 17th holder of a hereditary baronetcy, said the rise in raw material prices had reduced its gross margins to 53pc and that had directly led to the loss.
Osborne & Little made use of its banking facilities with HSBC, drawing more heavily on its invoice financing and its overdraft during the year. The overdraft is up for renewal in January and the directors said they were confident the bank would renew the facilities.
Oh dear what a shame....
A runaway gritter hit black ice, skidded down a hill and crashed into the garden of an Inverness home.
Audrey Barnett, 40, was woken by a loud noise on Tuesday morning and found the vehicle embedded in the front garden of her home.
The gritter’s crew was unhurt, although a neighbour’s car was also damaged in the crash.
“I heard a loud bang, and thought, this sounds close. I looked out of the window and there was a snow plough sitting in my garden,” Mrs Barnett said. “It had bashed into my next door neighbour’s car, then through the dividing fence and completely taken out the top half of my garden.
“I could see two shocked men in the plough. They opened the doors, and the driver got out and fell on the ice before they came over.”
Having offered what help they could and given Mrs Barnett a council phone number to ring, the men then reversed the vehicle and left. Highland Council officials visited her house on Tuesday and confirmed they would rebuild the garden and foot the bill.
Ironic or what....
Photography tuition company Red Cloud has launched the contest to find the country’s most inept snapper.
Entrants have included blurred faces, missed animal shots and extreme close-ups that go so far they miss the subject.
Organisers said they want to prove even the most hapless photographer can be turned into a budding pro.
‘We think everyone has the potential to take great photos with a little help and training,’ said Red Cloud founder Lee Brown.
Pictures should be submitted, with the photographer’s permission, to email@example.com before the end of February.
Competition entries can be viewed at www.redclouddays.co.uk, where people will be able to vote for their favourite ‘worst’ image.
Already sent in my entry...
Andy Simpson says his new delicacy of Brussels coated in finest Belgian chocolate are selling like hot cakes at just 25p each.
Andy, who has a store at the Elsecar Heritage Centre, near Barnsley, South Yorks, came up with the idea while on one of his regular visits to schools, where he teaches pupils about the origins of their favourite treat.
The 49-year-old said: "I am always looking for something new and with Christmas approaching Brussels sprouts immediately popped into my mind.
"I decided to try them out on customers and they are proving popular and I'm hoping to sell a lot more to people looking for something a little different to have with their Christmas dinner.
"I know Brussels sprouts are a bit like Marmite, you either love them or loathe them. I like them, they are a nice chocolatey shape but I must admit they are an acquired taste."
Think I’ll pass on that one.
Cabin crew from a Philippine airliner who danced to fame after incorporating Lady Gaga into their safety demo have learnt a new routine set to Mariah Carey's All I Want For Christmas.Manila-based Cebu Pacific airline gained fame by dancing through their safety routine to the backing of Lady Gaga, but this time have updated it for the festive holiday period.
The Philippine airline says the choreographed dance helps passengers pay more attention to the demonstration, which instructs passengers of how to use their seat belts and life jackets.
Candice Iyog, an airline spokesman, said: "Now that it's Christmas, we wanted to bring a little more fun into the flight."
They haven’t been watching the news have they...
That’s it: I’m orf to count the toes on a Jumbo
And today’s thought: