Friday, 11 May 2012

Royal Mail fail: Job costs: Orbiting the Olympics: Bangers and Mash point (without the mash): Costa club: Fish bites cat: and want a Sea Shadow?


The big yellow thing has finally appeared at the Castle this morn, bit chilly with a whimsy of wind but it is DRY!-so far.


Yestermorn (just) a postcard dropped onto the mat inside the portcullis from the Royal Fail to inform me that apparently they couldn’t deliver something because the sender failed to pay the ransom by a whole 9p, and they want to charge me £1 for the privilege:

If I want to retrieve my goods I can -


Put £1.09 worth of stamps on said ransom demand and stagger dahn to the post-box, and then wait another week.

Drive dahn to the ‘sorting office’, pay £1 to park and then hand over £1.09 in cash to the kidnappers.
 

Allegedly they will keep my goods which I own (a small pack of 20mm fence staples for the bamboo screen) for eighteen days and then post it back to the sender.

Is it me or has Blighty gone completely barmy? Click on the pic to read this load of old bollocks.





Each new job created by a flagship government scheme could cost taxpayers as much as £200,000.
The Regional Jobs Fund was designed to help businesses create private sector jobs in parts of the country with high levels of public sector employment.
But the National Audit Office (NAO) said value for money had not been "optimised".
The government has already made changes to improve the scheme, Business Secretary Vince Cable claimed.
The NAO examined the first £1.4bn awarded from the fund and found it could lead to an extra 41,000 jobs over the next seven years.
The average cost per job created was £33,000, but they said the cost could vary "from under £4,000 to over £200,000".
 

Another Piss Poor Policy from “our” coulda, woulda, shoulda Millionaires Club Coalition...





The big red helter skelter has been opened, the completed steel sculpture - known as ArcelorMittal Orbit - stands at the heart of the Olympic Park.
It was designed by Turner Prize-winning artist Anish Kapoor and structural designer Cecil Balmond.
From the end of July, visitors will be able to climb on the £22.7m structure to take in panoramic views across London's skyline.
With a height of 114.5 metres (376ft), it is the tallest sculpture in the UK.
Visitors will be able to go up the 35-storey structure in a lift, and will have the option of walking down its spiralling staircase.
Steel company ArcelorMittal provided £19.2m towards the cost of building the Orbit, with the remaining £3.1m being funded by London Development Agency.


Oh joy-I hope there is plenty of rust proofing on it....





A butcher has invented a device to be stocked with gourmet goodies such as cheese stuffed bangers and rare white varieties.

 And to access the meaty treats, all customers have to do is use their credit card and pin number.

Steffen Schutze, 31, also sells marinated steak and chicken wings from the machine, but admits that sausages are his main seller.

"It's a great idea for busy people who can't get to the shops. Now all he needs is another machine to dispense potatoes," said one customer.



Yeah right...





Paris, the City of lots of people in France, is also the city with the most expensive club sandwich in the world, according to a global survey released Wednesday by an online travel service.

Hotels.com said it price-checked club sandwiches at more than 750 hotels in 26 cities in Asia, Europe, North America and South America to help travellers size up the affordability of different national capitals.

The result? Paris topped the list with an average price of $33.10 for the iconic chicken, bacon, egg, lettuce and mayonnaise sandwich that's a fixture on virtually every hotel restaurant and room-service menu.

Geneva placed second at $32.56, followed by Oslo at $30.50. New Delhi was cheapest at $9.57. Berlin and Brasilia were bang in the middle at $17.77 each -- slightly more expensive than New York's $16.93.

Tokyo came in at $27.65, Hong Kong at $18.35, London at $18.71 and Toronto at $16.05.





I’m orf to New Delhi then-with a bucket...and a toilet roll...and a butt plug...




A pussy turns into a chicken.



And finally:




The US military has put its $195 million stealth ship built back in 1984 (but the world didn't see the Sea Shadow for nine years because it was loaded with the type of stealth technology that made the US Air Force's F-35 Lightning II so famous)  up for sale, starting price is $50,000 .

The snag is that once you own it you have to scrap it.

"The ex-Sea Shadow shall be disposed of by completely dismantling and scrapping within the USA," the description on the sale item reads.

"Dismantling is defined as reducing the property such as it has no value except for its basic material content."


Not much of a bargain then...but if you want a pile of metal you can bid on it Here





And today’s thought:
21st century delivery system




Angus  

4 comments:

Bernard said...

"... all customers have to do is use their credit card and pin number."
Then open the door and remove the entire contents!
Can you see how they limit you to the one item you paid for?

Angus said...

Not too sure Bernard the banger-is that a door under the card thingy?

But is it a perfect target for the Romanian chip and pin cloners:)

CherryPie said...

I am not at all sure about that Olympic structure!

Angus said...

It just doesn't look finished CherryPie:)