Monday, 12 December 2011

Dwarf King: PO “locals”: Oh no-no Cocoa: Painting the town: Chuffin Crimbo: and Poodle plod.


Layers of the white crusty stuff at the Castle this morn, the butler is happily storing fat teenagers in the furnace, his Maj managed to go out, do his business and return to the warm in less than a minute and the ducks are ice skating on the moat.




Think of the barmiest thing you can imagine and then add a bit-Old fart and still living in Politico world Tony Benn has come up with a stonking plan.
He thinks that the Queen could be replaced by the House of Commons' Speaker in a republican Britain which maintains a titular head of state.
"If you're looking for a titular head of state I think the Speaker of the House of Commons would be perfect - he's respected, he understands the constitution," Mr Benn added.
 

Bollocks; dopey can’t even control his missus, let alone the country....



Allegedly Up to 2,000 rural post offices will close from next summer and be replaced by limited counter services in garages and shops.
Under plans that will be rolled out from June, one fifth of the branch network will be converted into new "PO Locals", which offer a downgraded service within other commercial premises.
Customers will not be able to apply for driving licences, send post bulky mail overseas, pay car tax or make cash withdrawals using passbooks.
The changes will affect one in five of the 11,500 post offices across the country.
Last night the Department for Business, Innovation and Skills, which is expected to take over the running of the post office network from Royal Mail in April next year, defended the plans.
Customers would also benefit from being able to access post office services round the clock, during the hours that the convenience store or garage is open.
A BIS spokesman said: “The Post Office network will be maintained at its current size and coverage of 11,500 outlets nationwide and strict access criteria must be met to ensure reasonable access to services for all.

“This is about making sure that people have access to the services they want and need from their post office, at times they want them, and making running a post office more profitable for hard working sub-postmasters.”


As long as they don’t want to “apply for driving licences, send post bulky mail overseas, pay car tax or make cash withdrawals using passbooks.

  


Apparently a shortage of cocoa could lead to a drop in production of chocolate all over the world.
Industry insiders predict a one-million-ton shortage of cocoa within eight years, fuelled by growing demand in Asia, mainly from China.
It means an area the size of the Ivory Coast must become included in cocoa cultivation to boost production to the required levels.
Farmers also need more training to help increase their cocoa bean crops or prices will rise, warn experts.
More cocoa substitutes could be used in making chocolate.


That’ll make finding fat teenagers for the furnace a bit harder for the butler....




Tucked away in one corner of the large city of Taichung, Taiwan lies a modest ‘military dependents’ village’ – a community built in the late 1940s and the 1950s to serve as provisional housing for Nationalist soldiers, but ended up becoming permanent settlements.
Over the years, many military dependents' villages have suffered from urban problems such as housing dereliction, abandonment, urban decay, and urban slum. This drab place has now been transformed into a beautiful and vibrant tourist hotspot, thanks to the colourful paintings of Huang Yung-fu, an 86-year-old veteran from Taichung City.

Cheerful, hope he got planning permission...



National Rail launched its new timetables yesterday.
Changes come into effect across the whole country and will remain in place until Sunday, 20 May 2012.
The main alterations affect service run by the following train operating companies: Arriva Trains Wales, c2c, Chiltern Railways, East Coast, East Midlands Trains, First Capital Connect, First Great Western, Grand Central, London Midland, Merseyrail, National Express East Anglia, Northern Rail, ScotRail, South West Trains , Southeastern and Stansted Express.

Among the changes are:
Retimed early morning trains between Bridgend and Cardiff have been retimed
An increased peak-time service at West Ham, giving additional connections to London Underground and Docklands Light Railway
Reduced journey times to and from London Marylebone
More East Coast trains calling at Berwick-upon-Tweed on Saturdays
An increased number of trains to and from Lincoln
An increased number of carriages on some peak-time Thameslink trains between Bedford and Brighton
A Sunday service during the winter months on the line between Par and Newquay
Faster journey times for several trains between London Paddington and Reading, and on Thames Valley branches (Henley-on-Thames / Marlow)
Additional carriages on trains to and from Walsall, Shrewsbury, Leamington Spa, Stourbridge, Hereford and Stratford-upon-Avon
Increased number of Chester services during the morning peak hours
A new service between Broxbourne and London Liverpool Street, and trains between Bishops Stortford and Stratford running every 30 minutes
Additional evening-peak services between Manchester Piccadilly, Marple, New Mills and Sheffield
Additional trains on several ScotRail routes, including Inverness - Glasgow and Edinburgh, Dundee - Glasgow, Elgin / Aberdeen - Inverness, and Ayr - Girvan
Additional train services during the day between Bromley South and Grove Park

 Click here for live arrivals and departures at your local station if you still have one.....


And finally:



Police in the western Japanese prefecture of Tottori unveiled two unusual new recruits - a pair of toy poodles, the Nihonkai Shimbun reported.
Fuga, two, and Karin one, passed the police canine test in July and will be put to work finding missing hikers in the mountainous region.
The female toy poodles, one of which is gray and the other brown, also would take part in criminal manhunts, the report said.
Poodles are an unusual choice of police dog -- normally, larger breeds are preferred.
"Their trainers thought the dogs had keen senses and responded exceptionally well to commands," AFP quoted a spokesman as saying.
The remote Tottori prefecture, some 300 miles (480 kilometres) from Tokyo, does not have a full-time police canine force and relies on about 20 domestic dogs with special training to help when needed.
 

What can you say.....

  


And today’s thought:


Angus

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