Water, water everywhere: Fine crime: Paint your manhole: Sheep bunny: Flip-flop lawn: and Paper cities.

Cold as the coldest thing you could think of at the Castle this morn, left at 4 of the am yestermorn and arrived home at 10 of the pm, met some people I didn’t like that much, was presented with an offer I couldn’t live with and had a lunch that was expensive and poorly “chef’ed”. 

I hate France...

 

Back in Blighty

It seems that the tosspots at Ofwat (or Orftwat) have decided that the foreign owners of our water will be allowed to increase prices by 5.7% from April to about £376 per household on average.

The regulator said that the average rise was made up of November's retail prices index of 5.2%, plus 0.5%.

"Inflation feeds through into water bills, and this is driving these rises, the twat at the top of Ofwat” Regina Finn, Ofwat's chief executive, said in a statement on Tuesday.

"We understand that any bill rise is unwelcome, particularly in tough economic times. We will make sure customers get value for money," she said.

 

Bollocks.....

And just to add to our misery

Old fart Ken Clarke has come up with punning clan to screw motorists even more.

Drivers could see standard £60 fines increase by almost 70 per cent to compensate victims of crime even though there is no direct victim in many motoring offences.

Those who go to court to challenge speeding tickets or for more serious driving offences could pay up to £120 in to the programme.

The fines for motorists come as part of a huge expansion in the Victims Surcharge scheme, which currently levies just £15 on top of fines issued by courts.

Half of the additional revenues from speeding fines will be used to compensate victims, while the remainder will be used for road safety schemes or be used to boost Treasury coffers.

Ministers hope to raise around £30 million a year just from fixed penalty surcharges.

Fuck off....

East to the land where things can only get better

Apparently “artists” have been painting their manholes.

Go on click on the link; mind you once you have seen one manhole.....

West to the land where they know how to deal with more than an inch of snow  

On a farm near Käl, in Sweden there is a new shepherd-Champis the dwarf rabbit has made himself indispensable around the farm he lives on - by taking on the role of resident sheep dog.

Bless.

Dahn Unda

An Australian footwear company has reported ‘amazing’ sales after launching a new pair of flip flops made of fake grass.

The company’s website shows sun seekers walking along the beach in the grass slippers which occasionally need to be fluffed for added comfort.

The KUSA website explains: ‘Love the feeling of bare feet on freshly mowed grass?  Why not have that feeling anywhere, anytime. KUSA flip flops give you the opportunity to do just that. 

‘Where would you rather be? What would you rather be doing?  Close your eyes and you are there!’

The bizarre footwear seems to have been a hit with customers across the globe, appearing on various trendsetting and fashion websites.

Customers have been advised not to mow the grass to avoid damaging the product.

Thongs ain’t what they used to be...

And finally: 

Somewhere in the wobbly world

Origami architect, Ingrid Siliakus, can spend up to two months painstakingly creating entire cities purely from folding pieces of paper.

 

About time she got a proper job... 

That’s it: I’m orf to keep well away from large speakers.

And today’s thought:

Angus