Argy Atlantis: Boris exposed: Seven fingered Numpty: Brazilian virus: Death Wish Coffee: and Glowing with health.

Miserable misty stuff, much lack of warm, minimal atmospheric movement and sod all solar stuff at the Castle this morn, the butler is feeding fat, carbon neutral teenagers into the furnace with a will and his Maj has discovered the joy of ambush from the top of the kitchen cupboards.

I am orf to the General Medic tomorrow to have my elbow “pecked” so there may not be a post for a day-or three...

 

West to the land of ‘Orses and grass

Apparently until the 1980s, Villa Epceun was a thriving tourist hotspot 350 miles south of the Argentinean capital Buenos Aires. All that changed on November 10, 1985 though, when a prolonged period of heavy rain caused the salt water lagoon that brought so many visitors to the area to burst its banks, submerging the entire village in 30 feet of water.

But 27 years later the waters have almost entirely receded and the town has re-emerged from the murk.

Roads can still clearly be made out, particularly around the town's slaughterhouse and its religious monuments.

A launderette, complete with tumble dryers and washing machines, can be seen in one image but, as with much of the rest of the town, the sheer force of the water that engulfed it has left the area in ruins.

And as always an Argy has claimed a bit of land and has moved back in, the village's sole occupant Pablo Novak said he spends his days cycling around the ruins, remembering his home town's “glory days”.

The 81-year-old said: “Until about four or five years after the flood, when the waters were still high, nobody came around here at all...I was totally alone. All day, every day”.

Mr Novak says that in recent months, more and more visitors have been returning to the area, some to view the waterlogged village, while others return in an attempt to salvage possessions they never thought they'd see again.

 

Spiffing; with the extra territory they don’t need the Falklands then....

 

And Auntie is “doing” Boris

In a forthcoming BBC 2 documentary, the mayor of London says he thinks the job of PM is "very, very tough".

But he will say he would like to "have a crack" at it "if the ball came loose from the back of a scrum".

The mayor has been talked up as a possible future Conservative leader, but he has always said he would see out his second term as mayor until 2016.

Documentary maker Michael Cockerell told the Radio Times that when asked whether he harboured any desires for the top job, Mr Johnson answered: "I think it's a very tough job being prime minister.

"Obviously, if the ball came loose from the back of a scrum - which it won't - it would be a great, great thing to have a crack at.

"But it's not going to happen."

In the documentary, Mr Johnson says he feels embarrassed about his past as a member of the notorious Bullingdon Club, a dining group for ex-public schoolboys at Oxford University, whose members also included Mr Cameron.

"This is a truly shameful vignette of almost superhuman undergraduate arrogance, toffishness and twittishness," he said.

"But at the time you felt it was wonderful to be going round swanking it up. Or was it? Actually I remember the dinners being incredibly drunken."

Asked about the club's reputation for smashing up restaurants, he admitted: "Yes. And the abiding memory is of deep, deep self-loathing."

 

Bonkers Boris also reveals there is a strategy behind his public persona: "As a general tactic in life, it is often useful to give the slight impression that you are deliberately pretending not to know what's going on - because the reality may be that you don't know what's going on, but people won't be able to tell the difference."

 

No change there then.....

 

West again to where people have the right to bare arms

Police in Pennsylvania said a man is facing weapons charges after shooting his own finger while attempting to "get rid of his wedding ring."

Bradford police said officers responded at 8:56 p.m. March 2 to a home on a report of a man intentionally shooting off his own finger and they arrived to find Alfredo Fortunato Malespini III, 31, a lieutenant at the Federal Correctional Institution-McKean, bleeding from a severe wound to his left hand, The Bradford Era reported Monday.

Malespini, who police said was highly intoxicated, told officers he was "trying to get rid of his wedding ring" and had decided to "shoot it off."

Police said the man's attempt had been unsuccessful, as the finger was nearly severed but the ring was still attached.

Twat....should have used some Vaseline-I’m sure there is an ample supply in the prison.

 

 And East more than a whimsy

Allegedly having a Brazilian is bad for your health, a dermatologist in Nice, France, observed more and more patients coming to his office with molluscum contagiosum virus (MCV) outbreaks in their nether regions. About 93 percent of these 30 patients, both male and female, shaved, waxed, or clipped their pubic hair. This made Dr. Francois Desruelles, MD, wonder about the relationship between grooming downstairs and the spread of MCV.  

“Pubic hair removal is a body modification for the sake of fashion, especially in young women and adolescents, but also growing among men,” writes Desruelles in a letter published online in the British Medical Journal. “Anyway, pubic hair removal may be a risk factor for STMC [sexually transmitted MCV] or perhaps other STIs …”

MCV, a pox virus, spreads by skin-to-skin contact, from sharing items such as towels or clothes, or sexual contact. It causes pearly papules with dimples in the middle. While MCV looks unsightly, it is not painful and often goes away without treatment. Although a few bumps might be an inconvenience, some people develop hundreds of these papules, which can be embarrassing and disfiguring.

After looking at cases of sexually transmitted MCV, Desruelles believes that people are self-inoculating, meaning they are giving themselves pubic MCV from grooming. A person might shave a papule on her leg, for example, and the virus remains on the blade, which transfers it to her lady parts.

 

You’d need a strimmer to sort out my nether hair...

  

Left again to the place where apples are large

A New York man is marketing the world's strongest coffee - under the brand name of Death Wish Coffee.

Double the strength of an espresso, Death Wish Coffee even comes with a disclaimer warning drinkers to expect 'many sleepless nights'.

Mike Brown, the man behind the blend, used to work in a small coffee shop in New York, but got fed up with customers asking for stronger coffee.

"I always had customers coming in asking for our strongest and boldest roast," he said.

"I had to go through the process every day of explaining to them that dark roasts were actually the least caffeinated.

"This began my journey for finding and roasting the Death Wish bean and after many trial and error processes I found it.

"The type of blend, bean and roasting process we use makes Death Wish Coffee the strongest in the world.

"Its actual process is a secret because we have created something revolutionary and we do not want it stolen."

The extra-strong coffee is available to buy on Amazon and can be bought in packs of either ground coffee or whole beans.

 

Think I’ll stick to the instant stuff...

 

And finally:

 

From the country of European invaders

 

The largest pain management centre in the world, and a popular health tourism destination, the Healing Caves of Gastein welcome over 75,000 people every year. They all flock to this miraculous place to undergo a controversial form of therapy with radioactive radon gas used to cure a variety of medical conditions, from arthritis to psoriasis.

When the people of Gastein started exploring the nearby Radhausberg Mountain in search of gold, they had no idea they would discover something infinitely more valuable – naturally occurring low levels of radon gas. In time, they realized that the radioactive gas combined with the mountain caves’ high humidity and temperatures of up to 41.5° Celsius helped strengthen their immune system and cured some very serious illnesses. Word about the Gastein Healing Caves spread like wild fire throughout all of Austria, Germany and other Central European countries, and today Gastein is known not only as a world-class skiing destination, but also as a miraculous place of healing with a mind-blowing success rate of 90%. Most of the people who come here for radon treatment say a few sessions in the caves keep them pain-free for a whole year. Apparently, the radioactive gas is absorbed through the skin and lungs, activating the body at a cellular level and stimulating the self-healing process.

 

Pass.....

 

That’s it: I’m orf to track the old eyes

 

And today’s thought:

Who is next...?

 

 

Angus